Marriage aims at the glory of God through intimate companionship. God meant husband and wife to walk together, talk together, work together, and sleep together. As the Puritans said, God did not make the woman out of man's head to control him, or out of his feet for him to trample on her, but out of his side to be embraced near to his heart. Here is a book of practical encouragements for two key aspects of marriage: companionship and sex. Dr. Joel Beeke draws upon the wisdom of the Holy Scriptures and over three decades of pastoral ministry to present a dozen practical principles for fanning into flame the fire of love between husband and wife. The Bible has a higher aim than a satisfying marriage, namely, glorying in God forever. Marriage will one day be done, made obsolete by the magnificent relationship between Christ and His people. Even now, marriage is neither the chief purpose nor the highest joy of man. But the Scriptures do call wedded people to glorify God here and now through their marriages. Dr. Beeke's book aims to assist them in this. In Part I ("Friends"), the book explores the meaning, cultivation, and threats to friendship in marriage. Friendship is that personal bond of shared life that brings people together in delightful harmony. It is rooted God's created order of making men and women in His image. We broke this harmonious order when our first parents sinned against God, simultaneously turning against each other. But Christ is the great peacemaker and friendship-restorer. Cultivating friendship with your spouse is hard work, but profoundly rewarding. It revolves around sharing life together. The book gives guidance in how to share yourself with your spouse through the gifts of time, discussing decisions, listening to each other's feelings, talking about how God is at work in your lives, praying together, building trust, laughing together, giving thanks, pleasing your spouse, and finding shared interests. It also walks the reader through the minefields of giving and receiving correction, honoring in-laws, having balanced friendship with others, and supporting on another in crises. Above all, we must remember that our most important friendship is with our Lord Jesus Christ, who alone can walk with us through life, death, and eternity. In Part II ("Lovers"), Dr. Beeke sets forth several ways in which the gospel energizes married Christians to enjoy sex in holy delight. The words "gospel," "sex," and "holy," may not seem to go together. This book shows that in reality sexual love between husband and wife is both a holy duty pleasing to God and blessed privilege empowered by Christ's grace. Rather than splitting our lives into different compartments such as sex and religion, God calls us to respond to Christ's mercies by offering our whole existence to Him as a living sacrifice. The Bible teaches us doctrines like the image of God in man, the creation mandate God laid upon the human race, the moral law for marriage, forgiveness of sins by faith in Christ, sanctification by divine grace, Christ's call to take up our cross, adoption by God, and turning from idols to give thanks to God. All these doctrines have massive implications for our sexual relationship with our spouses. However these doctrines must do more than sit in our minds; they must sink into our hearts. In Reformed, experiential fashion, Dr. Beeke leads the reader to know, believe, feel, and act based upon God's Word applied by God's Spirit.
NATIONAL BESTSELLER • From Nobel Prize–winning author Alice Munro come nine short stories with “the intimacy of a family photo album and the organic feel of real life” (The New York Times) “In Munro’s hands, as in Chekhov’s, a short story is more than big enough to hold the world—and to astonish us, again and again.”—Chicago Tribune FINALIST FOR THE NATIONAL BOOK CRITICS CIRCLE AWARD • A TIME BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR • ONE OF THE NEW YORK TIMES’S 100 BEST BOOKS OF THE 21ST CENTURY In the nine breathtaking stories that make up this collection, Alice Munro creates narratives that loop and swerve like memory, conjuring up characters as thorny and contradictory as people we know ourselves. The fate of a strong-minded housekeeper with a “frizz of reddish hair,” just entering the dangerous country of old-maidhood, is unintentionally (and deliciously) reversed by a teenaged girl’s practical joke. A college student visiting her aunt for the first time and recognizing the family furniture stumbles on a long-hidden secret and its meaning in her own life. An inveterate philanderer finds the tables turned when he puts his wife into an old-age home. A young cancer patient stunned by good news discovers a perfect bridge to her suddenly regained future. A woman recollecting an afternoon’s wild lovemaking with a stranger realizes how the memory of that encounter has both changed for her and sustained her through a lifetime. Hateship, Friendship, Courtship, Loveship, Marriage is Munro at her best—tirelessly observant, serenely free of illusion, deeply and gloriously humane.
The new hit movie Love and Friendship starring Kate Beckinsale is based on two early works by Jane Austen, Lady Susan and Love and Freindship - both of which are included here. Fans of the movie will find the bulk of the plot has been taken from Lady Susan and the title from Love and Freindship.
Women in Victorian England wore jewelry made from each other's hair and wrote poems celebrating decades of friendship. They pored over magazines that described the dangerous pleasures of corporal punishment. A few had sexual relationships with each other, exchanged rings and vows, willed each other property, and lived together in long-term partnerships described as marriages. But, as Sharon Marcus shows, these women were not seen as gender outlaws. Their desires were fanned by consumer culture, and their friendships and unions were accepted and even encouraged by family, society, and church. Far from being sexless angels defined only by male desires, Victorian women openly enjoyed looking at and even dominating other women. Their friendships helped realize the ideal of companionate love between men and women celebrated by novels, and their unions influenced politicians and social thinkers to reform marriage law. Through a close examination of literature, memoirs, letters, domestic magazines, and political debates, Marcus reveals how relationships between women were a crucial component of femininity. Deeply researched, powerfully argued, and filled with original readings of familiar and surprising sources, Between Women overturns everything we thought we knew about Victorian women and the history of marriage and family life. It offers a new paradigm for theorizing gender and sexuality--not just in the Victorian period, but in our own.
The modern idea of Victorians is that they were emotionless prudes, imprisoned by sexual repression and suffocating social constraints; they expressed love and affection only within the bounds of matrimony—if at all. And yet, a wealth of evidence contradicting this idea has been hiding in plain sight for close to a century. In Manly Love, Axel Nissen turns to the novels and short stories of Victorian America to uncover the widely overlooked phenomenon of passionate friendships between men. Nissen’s examination of the literature of the period brings to light a forgotten genre: the fiction of romantic friendship. Delving into works by Mark Twain, Henry James, William Dean Howells, and others, Nissen identifies the genre’s unique features and explores the connections between romantic friendships in literature and in real life. Situating love between men at the heart of Victorian culture, Nissen radically alters our understanding of the American literary canon. And with its deep insights into the emotional and intellectual life of the period, Manly Love also offers a fresh perspective on nineteenth-century America’s attitudes toward love, friendship, marriage, and sex.
Excerpt from Friendship, Love and Marriage No word is oftener on the lips of men than Friendship. And indeed no thought is more familiar to their aspirations . All men are dreaming of it. And its drama. Which is always a tragedy. Is enacted daily. It is the secret of the universe. You may thread the town. You may wander the country. And none shall ever speak of it. Yet thought is everywhere busy about it. And the idea of what is possible in this respect afiects our behavior toward all new men and women. And a great many old ones. Nevertheless. I can remember only two or three essays on this subject in all literature fix No wonder that the Mythology. And Arabian Nights. And Scott's novels and Shakespeare entertain us - we are poets and fablers and novelists and dramatists ourselves. We are continually acting a part in a more interesting drama than any written. We are dreaming that our Friends are our Friends. And that we are our Friends' Friends. Our actual Friends are but distant relations of those to whom we are pledged. We never exchange more than three words with a Friend in our lives on that level to which our thoughts and feelings almost habitually rise. One goes forth prepared to say. Sweet Friends! And the salutation is. Damn your eyes But. Never mind; faint heart never won true Friend/ 0 my Friend. May it come to pass, once. That when you are my Friend I may be yours. ); Of what use the friendliest disposition even. If there are no hours given to Friendship. If it is forever postponed to unimportant duties and relations? Friendship is first. Friendship last. But it is equally impossible to forget our Friends. 12and to make them answer to our ideal. When they say farewell. Then indeed we begin to keep them company. How often we find ourselves turning our backs on our actual Friends. That we may go and meet their ideal cousins I would that I were worthy to be any man's Friend. About the Publisher Forgotten Books publishes hundreds of thousands of rare and classic books. Find more at www.forgottenbooks.com This book is a reproduction of an important historical work. Forgotten Books uses state-of-the-art technology to digitally reconstruct the work, preserving the original format whilst repairing imperfections present in the aged copy. In rare cases, an imperfection in the original, such as a blemish or missing page, may be replicated in our edition. We do, however, repair the vast majority of imperfections successfully; any imperfections that remain are intentionally left to preserve the state of such historical works."
***THE NOVEL OF THE HIT INDIE FILM*** 'If, like me, you like your Austen subversive, cruel, funny and outrageous, then you will love Stillman's Love & Friendship' The Times 'Lady Susan is finally getting some long overdue respect' New York Times 'Lady Susan remains deliciously wicked' Vogue With a pitch-perfect Austenian sensibility and wry social commentary, filmmaker and writer Whit Stillman cleverly re-imagines and completes one of our greatest writers' unfinished works. Love & Friendship is a sharp comedy of manners, and a fiendishly funny treat for Austen and Stillman fans alike. JANE AUSTEN'S FUNNIEST NOVEL IS ALSO HER LEAST KNOWN - UNTIL NOW. Impossibly beautiful, disarmingly witty, and completely self-absorbed: meet Lady Susan Vernon, both the heart and the thorn of Love & Friendship. Recently widowed with a daughter who's coming of age as quickly as their funds are dwindling, Lady Susan makes it her mission to find them wealthy husbands - and fast. But when her attempts to secure their futures result only in the wrath of a prominent conquest's wife and the title of 'most accomplished coquette in England', Lady Susan must rethink her strategy. Unannounced, she arrives at her brother-in-law's country estate. Here she intends to take refuge - in no less than luxury, of course - from the colorful rumors trailing her, while finding another avenue to 'I do'. Before the scandalizing gossip can run its course, though, romantic triangles ensue. A SPECIAL EDITION FEATURING JANE AUSTEN'S ORIGINAL NOVELLA AS ANNOTATED BY THE NARRATOR. PRAISE FOR LOVE & FRIENDSHIP THE FILM 'A RACY DELIGHT' Guardian ***** 'FIND ME A FUNNIER SCREEN STAB AT AUSTEN, AND I'M TEMPTED TO OFFER YOUR MONEY BACK PERSONALLY' Telegraph ***** 'TREMENDOUSLY WITTY' Independent ***** 'MAY JUST BE THE BEST JANE AUSTEN FILM EVER MADE' London Evening Standard *****
While observing exotic animal trainers for her acclaimed book Kicked, Bitten, and Scratched, journalist Amy Sutherland had an epiphany: What if she used these training techniques with the human animals in her own life–namely her dear husband, Scott? In this lively and perceptive book, Sutherland tells how she took the trainers’ lessons home. The next time her forgetful husband stomped through the house in search of his mislaid car keys, she asked herself, “What would a dolphin trainer do?” The answer was: nothing. Trainers reward the behavior they want and, just as important, ignore the behavior they don’t. Rather than appease her mate’s rising temper by joining in the search, or fuel his temper by nagging him to keep better track of his things in the first place, Sutherland kept her mouth shut and her eyes on the dishes she was washing. In short order, Scott found his keys and regained his cool. “I felt like I should throw him a mackerel,” she writes. In time, as she put more training principles into action, she noticed that she became more optimistic and less judgmental, and their twelve-year marriage was better than ever. What started as a goofy experiment had such good results that Sutherland began using the training techniques with all the people in her life, including her mother, her friends, her students, even the clerk at the post office. In the end, the biggest lesson she learned is that the only animal you can truly change is yourself. Full of fun facts, fascinating insights, hilarious anecdotes, and practical tips, What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage describes Sutherland’s Alice-in-Wonderland experience of stumbling into a world where cheetahs walk nicely on leashes and elephants paint with watercolors, and of leaving a new, improved Homo sapiens.