Wired for Love
Wired for Love

Author: Stan Tatkin

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2024-06-01

Total Pages: 332

ISBN-13: 1648482988

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"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.

Wired for Dating
Wired for Dating

Author: Stan Tatkin

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2016-01-02

Total Pages: 245

ISBN-13: 1626253056

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In the age of online dating, finding a real connection can seem more daunting than ever! So, why not stack the odds of finding the right person in your favor? This book offers simple, proven-effective principles drawn from neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find the perfect mate. Everybody wants someone to love and spend time with, and searching for your ideal partner is a natural and healthy human tendency. Just about everyone dates at some point in their lives, yet few really understand what they're doing or how to get the best results. In Wired for Dating, psychologist and relationship expert Stan Tatkin—author of Wired for Love—offers powerful tips based in neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find a compatible mate and go on to create a fabulous relationship. Using real-life scenarios, you’ll learn key concepts about how people become attracted to potential partners, move toward or away from commitment, and the important role the brain and nervous system play in this process. Each chapter explores the scientific concepts of attachment theory, arousal regulation, and neuroscience. And with a little practice, you’ll learn to apply these exercises and practical techniques to your dating life. If you’re ready to get serious (or not!) about dating, meet your match, and have more fun, this book will be your guide.

Wired for Love
Wired for Love

Author: Stephanie Cacioppo

Publisher: Flatiron Books

Published: 2022-04-05

Total Pages: 205

ISBN-13: 125079062X

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From the world’s foremost neuroscientist of romantic love comes a personal story of connection and heartbreak that brings new understanding to an old truth: better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. At thirty-seven, Dr. Stephanie Cacioppo was content to be single. She was fulfilled by her work on the neuroscience of romantic love—how finding and growing with a partner literally reshapes our brains. That was, until she met the foremost neuroscientist of loneliness. A whirlwind romance led to marriage and to sharing an office at the University of Chicago. After seven years of being inseparable at work and at home, Stephanie lost her beloved husband, John, following his intense battle with cancer. In Wired for Love, Stephanie tells not just a science story but also a love story. She shares revelatory insights into how and why we fall in love, what makes love last, and how we process love lost—all grounded in cutting-edge findings in brain chemistry and behavioral science. Woven through it all is her moving personal story, from astonishment to unbreakable bond to grief and healing. Her experience and her work enrich each other, creating a singular blend of science and lyricism that’s essential reading for anyone looking for connection.

Wired for Story
Wired for Story

Author: Lisa Cron

Publisher: Ten Speed Press

Published: 2012-07-10

Total Pages: 274

ISBN-13: 1607742462

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This guide reveals how writers can utilize cognitive storytelling strategies to craft stories that ignite readers’ brains and captivate them through each plot element. Imagine knowing what the brain craves from every tale it encounters, what fuels the success of any great story, and what keeps readers transfixed. Wired for Story reveals these cognitive secrets—and it’s a game-changer for anyone who has ever set pen to paper. The vast majority of writing advice focuses on “writing well” as if it were the same as telling a great story. This is exactly where many aspiring writers fail—they strive for beautiful metaphors, authentic dialogue, and interesting characters, losing sight of the one thing that every engaging story must do: ignite the brain’s hardwired desire to learn what happens next. When writers tap into the evolutionary purpose of story and electrify our curiosity, it triggers a delicious dopamine rush that tells us to pay attention. Without it, even the most perfect prose won’t hold anyone’s interest. Backed by recent breakthroughs in neuroscience as well as examples from novels, screenplays, and short stories, Wired for Story offers a revolutionary look at story as the brain experiences it. Each chapter zeroes in on an aspect of the brain, its corresponding revelation about story, and the way to apply it to your storytelling right now.

We Do
We Do

Author: Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT

Publisher: Sounds True

Published: 2018-12-01

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 1622038940

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“If you and your prospective partner adopt the principles and skills I describe here, your relationship will be successful—not just for starters, but for the long run.” An indispensable guide for any couple ready to set the foundation for a loving and lasting union Committing fully to a loving partnership—a “we”—can be one of the most beautiful and fulfilling experiences you’ll ever have. Yet as anyone in a long-term relationship will tell you, it can also be one of the most challenging. Almost half of all first marriages end in divorce, and chances go down from there. So how do you beat the odds? “All successful long-term relationships are secure relationships,” writes psychotherapist Stan Tatkin. “You and your partner take care of each other in a way that ensures you both feel safe, protected, accepted, and secure at all times.” In We Do, Tatkin provides a groundbreaking guide for couples. You’ll figure out whether you and your partner are right for each other in the long term, and if so, give your relationship a strong foundation so you can enjoy a secure and lasting love. Highlights include: Create a shared vision for your relationship, the key to a strong foundationIt’s all about prevention—learn tools and techniques for preventing problems before they occurUnderstand how to work with the psychological and biological influences in your relationship—neuroscience, arousal regulation, attachment theory, and moreNumerous case studies with helpful examples of healthy and unhealthy interactions, sample dialogues, and reflectionsDozens of exercises—the newlywed game, reading facial expressions, and many more fun and serious practices to develop intimacy and securityHandling conflict—how to broker win-win outcomesBuild a loving relationship that helps you thrive and grow as both individuals and a couple Common interests, physical attraction, shared values, and good communication skills are the factors most commonly thought to indicate a good partnership. Yet surprisingly, current research reveals that these are only a small part of what makes for a healthy marriage—much more important are psychological and biological influences. With We Do, you’ll learn to navigate these elements and more, giving your relationship the best possible chance to succeed.

Wired for Love
Wired for Love

Author: Stephanie Cacioppo

Publisher: Robinson

Published: 2022-04-07

Total Pages: 224

ISBN-13: 9781472145543

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From the world's foremost neuroscientist of romantic love comes a personal story of connection and heartbreak that brings new understanding to an old truth: better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.At thirty-seven, Dr. Stephanie Cacioppo was content to be single. She was fulfilled by her work on the neuroscience of romantic love; how finding and growing with a partner literally reshapes our brains. That was, until she met the foremost neuroscientist of loneliness. A whirlwind romance led to marriage, to sharing an office at the University of Chicago. After seven years of being inseparable at work and home, she lost her beloved husband following a devastating battle with cancer.In Wired for Love, Dr. Stephanie Cacioppo tells not just not just a science story, but also a love story. She shares revelatory insights into how we fall in love, and why; what makes love last; and how we process love lost-all grounded in cutting-edge findings in brain chemistry and behavioural science. Woven through it all is her moving personal story, from astonishment, to unbreakable bond, to grief and healing. Her experience and her work enrich each other, creating a singular blend of science and lyricism that's essential reading for anyone looking for connection.

Wired Love
Wired Love

Author: Ella Cheever Thayer

Publisher: Good Press

Published: 2019-11-19

Total Pages: 152

ISBN-13:

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This is an adorable story of online love in the late Victorian era. It tells about the affection that emerged from the telegraph chat of two operators that had never seen each other before. Although it was written in the 1880s, the story's spirit is amazingly contemporary. The main character wanted to solve the confusion of a misspelled word with another operator, known as "C." From this point, they started exchanging messages. Their story is full of charm—unexpected turns and pitfalls known to everyone who started their relations online.

Getting the Love You Want
Getting the Love You Want

Author: Harville Hendrix

Publisher: Macmillan

Published: 2001

Total Pages: 340

ISBN-13: 9780805068955

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I know of no better guide for couples who genuinely desire a maturing relationship.M. Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled A remarkable bookthe most incisive and persuasive I have ever read on the knotty problems of marriage relationships. Ann Roberts, former president, Rockefeller Family Fund

Rewire Your Brain for Love
Rewire Your Brain for Love

Author: Marsha Lucas, Ph.D.

Publisher: Hay House, Inc

Published: 2012-02-01

Total Pages: 242

ISBN-13: 1401931626

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In Rewire Your Brain for Love, neuropsychologist Marsha Lucas brings together neuroscience and mindfulness meditation in an exciting program to help readers create and sustain better, healthier, juicier romantic relationships. With a passion for neuroscience and the ability to relay it in a clear, unintimidating--and funny--manner, Lucas delves into how the human brain works in relationships, exploring the neurological connections that fuel our reactions. In an inviting and reassuring tone, she describes how we developed our current relationship wiring and how to modify it through mindfulness meditation. Focusing on nine high-voltage benefits-including everything from being able to better manage your reactions, to improved communication with yourself and others, to an enhanced ability to handle fear-Lucas shows how a short daily meditation practice can change the way you interact with everyone around you…especially those closest to you. Each chapter focuses on one benefit, including an in-depth description of exactly what that benefit is and how it will improve the reader's life. She looks at the science and research associated with mindfulness meditation in relation to each benefit, and then provides readers with a specific meditation to help bring that benefit into their relationships. Imagine, instead of blowing up at an off-hand statement your partner makes, you are able to stop, breathe, and respond in a thoughtful manner. And as the author says, "You don't have to become a monk, or a vegetarian, or spend hours contemplating your navel"; you simply need to notice your mind's busyness and not get all tangled up in it. This simple process truly can change your life.

A Book About Love
A Book About Love

Author: Jonah Lehrer

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2016-07-12

Total Pages: 304

ISBN-13: 1476761396

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“Jonah Lehrer has a lot to offer the world….The book is interesting on nearly every page….Good writers make writing look easy, but what people like Lehrer do is not easy at all.” —David Brooks, The New York Times Book Review Science writer Jonah Lehrer explores the mysterious subject of love. Weaving together scientific studies from clinical psychologists, longitudinal studies of health and happiness, historical accounts and literary depictions, child-rearing manuals, and the language of online dating sites, Jonah Lehrer’s A Book About Love plumbs the most mysterious, most formative, most important impulse governing our lives. Love confuses and compels us—and it can destroy and define us. It has inspired our greatest poetry, defined our societies and our beliefs, and governs our biology. From the way infants attach to their parents, to the way we fall in love with another person, to the way some find a love for God or their pets, to the way we remember and mourn love after it ends, this book focuses on research that attempts, even in glancing ways, to deal with the long-term and the everyday. The most dangerous myth of love is that it’s easy, that we fall into the feeling and then the feeling takes care of itself. While we can easily measure the dopamine that causes the initial feelings of “falling” in love, the partnerships and devotions that last decades or longer remain a mystery. This book is about that mystery. Love, Lehrer argues, is not built solely on overwhelming passion, but, fascinatingly, on a set of skills to be cultivated over a lifetime.