A unique book helping parents whose relationship with their older or adult child has not turned out as they expected deal with their pain, shame, and sense of loss, and take steps toward healing. This unique book supports parents who have lost the opportunity to be the parent they desperately wanted to be and who are mourning the loss of a harmonious relationship with their child. Through case examples and healing exercises, Dr. Coleman helps parents: • Reduce anger, guilt, and shame • Learn how temperament, the teen years, their own or a partner’s mistakes, and divorce can harm the parent-child bond • Come to terms with their imperfections and their child’s • Develop strategies for reaching out and for maintaining their self-esteem through trying times • Understand how society’s expectations contribute to the risk of parental wounds. By helping parents recognize what they can do and let go of what they cannot, Dr. Coleman helps families develop more positive ways of relating to themselves and each other.
A guide for parents whose adult children have cut off contact that reveals the hidden logic of estrangement, explores its cultural causes, and offers practical advice for parents trying to reestablish contact with their adult children. “Finally, here’s a hopeful, comprehensive, and compassionate guide to navigating one of the most painful experiences for parents and their adult children alike.”—Lori Gottlieb, psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone Labeled a silent epidemic by a growing number of therapists and researchers, estrangement is one of the most disorienting and painful experiences of a parent's life. Popular opinion typically tells a one-sided story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents. However, the reasons for estrangement are far more complex and varied. As a result of rising rates of individualism, an increasing cultural emphasis on happiness, growing economic insecurity, and a historically recent perception that parents are obstacles to personal growth, many parents find themselves forever shut out of the lives of their adult children and grandchildren. As a trusted psychologist whose own daughter cut off contact for several years and eventually reconciled, Dr. Joshua Coleman is uniquely qualified to guide parents in navigating these fraught interactions. He helps to alleviate the ongoing feelings of shame, hurt, guilt, and sorrow that commonly attend these dynamics. By placing estrangement into a cultural context, Dr. Coleman helps parents better understand the mindset of their adult children and teaches them how to implement the strategies for reconciliation and healing that he has seen work in his forty years of practice. Rules of Estrangement gives parents the language and the emotional tools to engage in meaningful conversation with their child, the framework to cultivate a healthy relationship moving forward, and the ability to move on if reconciliation is no longer possible. While estrangement is a complex and tender topic, Dr. Coleman's insightful approach is based on empathy and understanding for both the parent and the adult child.
In this New York Times bestseller, one of America’s premier physicians offers a must-read account of the new challenges facing parents today and a program for how we can better prepare our children to navigate the obstacles they face In The Collapse of Parenting, internationally acclaimed author Leonard Sax argues that rising levels of obesity, depression, and anxiety among young people can be traced to parents abdicating their authority. The result is children who have no standard of right and wrong, who lack discipline, and who look to their peers and the Internet for direction. Sax shows how parents must reassert their authority - by limiting time with screens, by encouraging better habits at the dinner table, and by teaching humility and perspective - to renew their relationships with their children. Drawing on nearly thirty years of experience as a family physician and psychologist, along with hundreds of interviews with children, parents, and teachers, Sax offers a blueprint parents can use to help their children thrive in an increasingly complicated world.
Hurt provided a vivid and insightful view into the world of today's teenagers. Now leading youth ministry expert Chap Clark substantially updates and revises his groundbreaking bestseller (over 55,000 copies sold). Hurt 2.0 features a new chapter on youth at society's margins and new material on social networking and gaming. Each chapter has been thoroughly revised with new research, statistics, quotations, and documentation. Praise for the first edition "Based on solid research and years of insightful observation, Hurt offers a deep and penetrating look into the contemporary adolescent experience that will serve us well as we work to have a prophetic, preventive, and redemptive influence on the world of today's youth culture."--Walt Mueller, Center for Parent/Youth Understanding "A daring yet hopeful glance into the underworld of teen promiscuity, self-mutilation, and suicide. . . . A groundbreaking resource for parents, youth ministers, and counselors."--ForeWord "Clark's classic book [is] highly recommended by youth workers and educators who write about teenage stress. It is foundational reading that provides valuable insight into the hurting hearts of young people."--YouthWorker Journal "Clark has been stepping inside the world of teenagers for many years. This book is a unique invitation for us to join him in their world. When we finish this journey, we will care more about kids and understand who they are and the challenges they face."--Denny Rydberg, Young Life "Drawing together research from many others along with his fresh exploration into the world beneath, Clark paints a compelling picture of adolescent life. . . . This book is a must-read for anyone who has any contact with adolescents."--Journal of Youth Ministry
Parents of a child in pain want nothing more than to offer immediate comfort. But a child with chronic or recurring pain requires much more. His or her parents need skills and strategies not only for increasing comfort but also for helping their child deal with an array of pain-related challenges, such as school disruption, sleep disturbance, and difficulties with peers. This essential guide, written by an expert in pediatric pain management, is the practical, accessible, and comprehensive resource that families and caregivers have been awaiting. It offers in-the-moment strategies for managing a child’s pain along with expert advice for fostering long-term comfort. Dr. Rachael Coakley, a clinical pediatric psychologist who works exclusively with families of children with chronic or recurrent pain, provides a set of research-proven strategies—some surprisingly counter-intuitive—to achieve positive results quickly and lastingly. Whether the pain is disease-related, the result of an injury or surgery, or caused by another condition or syndrome, this book offers what every parent of a child in pain most needs: effective methods for reversing the cycle of chronic pain.
When Anger Hurts Your Kids: is the result of a two-year study of 285 parets, exploring when, how and why parents get angry at their kids, and the best way to handle anger.
Without avoiding the grim statistics, this book reveals the real hope that hurting children can be healed through adoptive and foster parents, social workers, and others who care. Includes information on foreign adoptions.
BONUS: This edition contains an excerpt from Dr. Susan Forward's Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them. When you were a child... Did your parents tell you were bad or worthless? Did your parents use physical pain to discipline you? Did you have to take care of your parents because of their problems? Were you frightened of your parents? Did your parents do anything to you that had to be kept secret? Now that you are an adult... Do your parents still treat you as if you were a child? Do you have intense emotional or physical reactions after spending time with your parents? Do your parents control you with threats or guilt? Do they manipulate you with money? Do you feel that no matter what you do, it's never good enough for your parents? In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward drawn on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents -- and discover an exciting new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.
As parents, we have a strong impulse to protect our children, but that very protection can end up handicapping them for life. Rather than seek to save them from the hard things, we must teach our kids how to cope with and rise above their problems. In one of his most important books to date, internationally known psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Kevin Leman shows parents how to - be good listeners - tell the truth, even when it's difficult - find balance between being protective and being overprotective - approach hurt and injustice as a learning experience rather than fostering a victim mentality - and much more Whether a child is dealing with a difficult family situation, bullies, the loss of friends, the death of a loved one, discrimination, abuse, a teen pregnancy, or even just trying to make sense of what they see in the news, this compassionate and practical book will help parents equip them to process, learn from, and rise above their situation.
A police car rolls up in front of your house--with your son in the back seat. A voice on the phone says your daughter is all right but won't tell you where she is--and then hangs up. A wallet disappears from your dresser and you're sure who took it--at least, somewhat sure. Many parents face problems beyond their ability to cope. John White ofers comfort to parents of children with severe problems--alcoholism, homosexuality, even suicide. Though he gives practical suggestions, this is not a how-to manual for making rebellious children behave. Rather the author helps all parents deal with their own guilt, frustration, anger and sense of inadequacy. White first asks, Why has the child rearing become such a complicated task? He looks to common sense, science and the Bible for an answer. Next he focuses on the parent-child relationship itself as trust erodes, arguments arise and the need for professional or legal counsel develops. Finally, he cautions us to avoid parenting techniques which emphasize pragmatism at the expense of what is moral and just. A book of comfort and counsel to parents in pain.
