Women need to understand that divorce is no longer a remote possibility, particularly if you are fifty years old. At that age, it is a likelihood. Women in mid life are often thrown away, always traumatized by being thrown away, and never prepared. Being over-fifty and thrown away in today's society can be devastating on a number of levels, including of course, emotionally, but particularly financially. This book will give you some things to think about and help you be prepared. It's worth reading, ladies.
Older women are thrown away every day by husbands who suddenly want to play. Families are broken apart and lives are destroyed. Men often "cloak" for one another, helping to destroy womens' lives as though it were just another game. Shockingly, society condones this behavior and thrown away wives are often blamed for getting themselves thrown away. Behind many older men driving flashy sports cars are wives whose lives have been completely devastated, good women whose identities have been stolen by younger, predatory women all too eager to take take over the identity of the wives. Besides the financial devastation of the throwaways is overwhelming traumatic stress and an insurmountable burden of struggling to rebuild late in life in a society that undervalues them. This book chronicles some of their stories, illuminates the truth behind inappropriately labeled "midlife crisis" of men and exposes the truth about what happens to thrown away women. I am sure you will be surprised by what you read.
Seventy now-adult children of divorce give their candid and often heart-wrenching answers to eight questions (arranged in eight chapters, by question), including: What were the main effects of your parents' divorce on your life? What do you say to those who claim that "children are resilient" and "children are happy when their parents are happy"? What would you like to tell your parents then and now? What do you want adults in our culture to know about divorce? What role has your faith played in your healing? Their simple and poignant responses are difficult to read and yet not without hope. Most of the contributors--women and men, young and old, single and married--have never spoken of the pain and consequences of their parents' divorce until now. They have often never been asked, and they believe that no one really wants to know. Despite vastly different circumstances and details, the similarities in their testimonies are striking; as the reader will discover, the death of a child's family impacts the human heart in universal ways.
The men who came to strangle me were shrinking my world like the most delicately tinted of bubbles, shrinking in ever narrowing circles from the upward gush of my own infancy. You've got to be crazy to see a psychiatrist. Don't call me if you're gnawing on a bad day, and all you want to do is have a discussion. We all marry our mirrors, someone who reflects how we feel about ourselves at the moment. Every wife is a mirror of her own husband's failures, and every husband a reflection of his wife's successes. If you want to make money, you find a void in society and fill it. With more than 60 percent of women being snuffed, it's no wonder a sharp promoter saturated the market with anarchists feeling their inadequacies. Their words fall like an embroidered saddle on a jackass. Remember when only female failures married when career success eluded them? Anarchists' dolls don't expand into motherhood. They're squeezed into silver plated girdles where the only private space is a purse.
The acclaimed author explores the hidden crises of Gen X women in this “engaging hybrid of first-person confession, reportage [and] pop culture analysis” (The New Republic). Ada Calhoun was married with children and a good career—and yet she was miserable. She thought she had no right to complain until she realized how many other Generation X women felt the same way. What could be behind this troubling trend? To find out, Calhoun delved into housing costs, HR trends, credit card debt averages, and divorce data. At every turn, she saw that Gen X women were facing new problems as they entered middle age—problems that were being largely overlooked. Calhoun spoke with women across America who were part of the generation raised to “have it all.” She found that most were exhausted, terrified about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed. And instead of being heard, they were being told to lean in, take “me-time,” or make a chore chart to get their lives and homes in order. In Why We Can’t Sleep, Calhoun opens up the cultural and political contexts of Gen X’s predicament. She offers practical advice on how to ourselves out of the abyss—and keep the next generation of women from falling in. The result is reassuring, empowering, and essential reading for all middle-aged women, and anyone who hopes to understand them.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A stunning “portrait of the enduring grace of friendship” (NPR) about the families we are born into, and those that we make for ourselves. A masterful depiction of love in the twenty-first century. NATIONAL BOOK AWARD FINALIST • MAN BOOKER PRIZE FINALIST • WINNER OF THE KIRKUS PRIZE A Little Life follows four college classmates—broke, adrift, and buoyed only by their friendship and ambition—as they move to New York in search of fame and fortune. While their relationships, which are tinged by addiction, success, and pride, deepen over the decades, the men are held together by their devotion to the brilliant, enigmatic Jude, a man scarred by an unspeakable childhood trauma. A hymn to brotherly bonds and a masterful depiction of love in the twenty-first century, Hanya Yanagihara’s stunning novel is about the families we are born into, and those that we make for ourselves. Look for Hanya Yanagihara’s latest bestselling novel, To Paradise.
