Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me
Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me

Author: Chelsea's Family, Friends, and Other Victims

Publisher: Borderline Amazing/A Chelsea Handler Book

Published: 2011-05-10

Total Pages: 174

ISBN-13: 1455504653

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A hilarious #1 bestselling collection of essays from those nearest and dearest to comedian Chelsea Handler--the people she's lied to. "My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate." -- Chelsea Handler, from Chapter 10 of Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang It's no lie: Chelsea Handler loves to smoke out "dumbassness," the condition people suffer from that allows them to fall prey to her brand of complete and utter nonsense. Friends, family, co-workers--they've all been tricked by Chelsea into believing stories of total foolishness and into behaving like total fools. Luckily, they've lived to tell the tales and, for the very first time, write about them.

Uganda Be Kidding Me
Uganda Be Kidding Me

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

Published: 2014-03-04

Total Pages: 245

ISBN-13: 1455599727

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In this uproarious collection of travel essays, Chelsea Handler sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever. On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea. But whether she's fumbling the seduction of a guide by not knowing where tigers live (Asia, duh) or wearing a bathrobe into the bush because her clothes stopped fitting seven margaritas ago, she's always game for the next misadventure. The situation gets down and dirty as she defiles a kayak in the Bahamas, and outright sweaty as she escapes from a German hospital on crutches. When things get truly scary, like finding herself stuck next to a passenger with bad breath, she knows she can rely on her family to make matters even worse. Thank goodness she has the devoted Chunk by her side-except for the time she loses him in Telluride. Complete with answers to the most frequently asked traveler's questions, hot travel trips, and travel etiquette, none of which should be believed, Uganda Be Kidding Me has Chelsea taking on the world, one laugh-out-loud incident at a time.

My Horizontal Life
My Horizontal Life

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

Published: 2013-04-30

Total Pages: 141

ISBN-13: 1455577529

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In this raucous collection of true-life stories, Chelsea Handler recounts her time spent in the social trenches with that wild, strange, irresistible, and often gratifying beast: the one-night stand. You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool. Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty. Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.

Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2009-12-29

Total Pages: 274

ISBN-13: 1416596364

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In a word: hilarious. . . . These are some of the funniest stories I have ever read and they're also some of the most unexpectedly heartfelt--Laura Zigman, author of "Animal Husbandry."

Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me
Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher:

Published: 2011

Total Pages: 392

ISBN-13:

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The friends, family, and co-workers of the late-night talk show host on the E! network describe how they have all been tricked by her into believing tales of utter nonsense and behaving like total fools.

Female Force: Chelsea Handler
Female Force: Chelsea Handler

Author: Melissa Seymour

Publisher: StormFront Entertainment

Published: 2014-09-10

Total Pages: 24

ISBN-13: 1632942208

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Chelsea Handler, the only female late-night TV host, is a trailblazer for women in comedy. Whether she’s joking with stars on Chelsea Lately, writing hilarious memoirs, or supporting LGBTQ issues, Handler always has our attention. Check out this comic to learn more about Handler’s successes, mistakes, and of course, some ridiculous quotes.

Just Kidding
Just Kidding

Author: Louis R. Franzini

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield

Published: 2012

Total Pages: 207

ISBN-13: 1442213361

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Just Kidding is for anyone who wants to learn how to use humor more effectively in their daily lives. It includes opinions, advice, and examples from comics, celebrities, and politicians. Topics include basic principles of comedy, political correctness, strategies to avoid potential pitfalls, and exercises to build humor skills.

Craniama
Craniama

Author: Bryan Sisson

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

Published: 2015-05-08

Total Pages: 243

ISBN-13: 1503513866

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In this highly intelligible age of technology and bewildering medical advances, researches are amassing large amounts of quantitative information regarding the causes and symptoms of the varied styles of brain injuries that cause troubles for so many. This book is an ethnographically valid expos through which I hope others can better understand the internal thought processes of those having experienced severe, closed-head injuries. By sharing countless, candid examples from my personal ethnography of fifteen years coping with closed-head injury, I wish to provide hopefulness in survivors and their families. The message of Craniama is not only about sorrowful inquiry, but one of celebration! After all, it is only through the natural integrity of survival that objective awareness can be realized. Recovery won't be easy, but when you can, dont be afraid to reawaken! I'm confident the medical community will help you during this time, but Id like to provide a road-map to those who wish to know more, at this very moment.

Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang
Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Author: Chelsea Handler

Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

Published: 2010-04-01

Total Pages: 139

ISBN-13: 0446563536

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In these personal essays, the hilarious comedian and Chelsea Lately host reflects on family, love life, and the absurdities of adulthood with "cheeky candor" and signature wit (Philadelphia Inquirer). Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the #1 bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood. Family moments are fair game, whether it's writing a report on Reaganomics to earn a Cabbage Patch doll, or teaching her father social graces by ordering him to stay indoors. It's open season on her love life, from playing a prank on her boyfriend (using a ravioli, a fake autopsy, and the Santa Monica pier) to adopting a dog so she can snuggle with someone who doesn't talk. And everyone better duck for cover when her beach vacation turns into matchmaking gone wild. Outrageously funny and deliciously wicked, Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang is good good good good! Chelsea Handler on . . . Being unpopular: "My parents couldn't have been more unreasonable when it came to fads or clothes that weren't purchased at a pharmacy." Living with her boyfriend: "He's similar to a large toddler, the only difference being he doesn't cry when he wakes up." Appreciating her brother: "He's a certified public accountant, and I have a real life." Arm-wrestling a maid of honor: "It wasn't her strength that intimidated me. It was the starry way her eyes focused on me, like Mike Tyson getting ready to feed."

How to Write a Book That Sells You
How to Write a Book That Sells You

Author: Robin Colucci

Publisher: Archway Publishing

Published: 2013

Total Pages: 253

ISBN-13: 1480802050

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More than eighty percent of Americans believe they should write and publish a book, but less than one percent actually does so. In How to Write a Book That Sells You, author Robin Colucci guides coaches, consultants, and entrepreneurs in writing and publishing a book that can become a power tool in their businesses. The steps presented in this guide seek to help you avoid or handle most of the blocks, distractions, and misunderstandings that prevent people from becoming authors. It teaches you how to excavate your most radical, leading-edge ideas and write a book that excites your audience and expands your impact. "If you are serious about creating a book that doesn't limp across the finish line, you need Robin Colucci's How to Write a Book That Sells You. It is the perfect launching pad to craft and create a book that generates superb credibility, connects you with your target audience, and seeds your financial empire. This is a title that delivers what it says. Judith Briles, Author YOU: Creating and Building Your Author and Book Platforms "Robin Colucci's How to Write a Book That Sells You shows readers the steps to write a book that builds credibility, influence, and drives readers to buy. A must read for anyone who wants to profit beyond book sales." Jill Lublin, 3x best selling author. Visit publicitycrashcourse.com/freegift "Whether you're just a beginner or a seasoned author, How to Write A Book that Sells You is required reading for success in today's electronically evolving market. Michael R. Drew, Promote A Book, 79 Consecutive Wall Street Journal, USA Today & New York Times best-sellers