Imagine the look on your sister's face when they see you reading this book. If you're really looking for the top 10 ways to kill your sister, stop what you are doing and seek psychiatric help immediately! For the rest of you, bring some dark humor to your day! This book is all about the reaction you get when someone sees it sitting on your desk or if they witness you actually reading it! Take it on a trip. Chill out with it in the living room. There is a funny little story within the book, but that's secondary to the response you'll get when people catch a glimpse of you with this! Great for a practical joke or some light hearted black humor, this prank book will surely bring a demented smile to the faces of those who share the same morbid sense of humor as you. Also makes a great gag gift for a brother, sister, relatives or anyone who enjoys some sick death humor. Fun for the whole dysfunctional family!
What would you do when faced with an impossible choice? An unputdownable thriller from the bestselling author of the Hangman series. 'Pure twist from start to finish' SARAH BAILEY 'twisted . . . fiendish . . . startling' GABRIEL BERGMOSER 'Survivor on steroids' GREG WOODLAND Would you kill your brother to save yourself? After months of searching, disgraced athlete Elise Glyk has finally found her missing brother, Callum. He's being held in a backyard prison by Stephanie Hartnell, a former sheep farmer with an axe to grind. But before she can free Callum or call for help, Elise is captured and locked up alongside him. Stephanie Hartnell doesn't have room for two prisoners, and she has nothing against Elise. But she needs to make sure Elise can't go to the police. So she offers her a deal: kill Callum, and you're free to go. Of course, Elise won't even consider the deal. No way. It's unthinkable. But she's running out of time to find another way out. And her brother may not have told her the whole truth ... A twisted roller-coaster of action and suspense from the acclaimed bestselling author of Hangman. 'Utterly compelling. A complex sibling relationship twisting and turning on itself . . . shades of Stephen King. Yes, it's that good . . . A wickedly delicious feast of a thriller.' SARAH THORNTON, author of Lapse
A searing family memoir, hailed as “remarkable” (The New York Times), “compelling” (People), and “engrossing” (Kirkus Reviews), of a trial lawyer’s tempestuous boyhood in Texas that led to the vicious murder of his brother by the father of actor Woody Harrelson. In 1968, David Berg’s brother, Alan, was murdered by Charles Harrelson, a notorious hit man and father of Woody Harrelson. Alan was only thirty-one when he disappeared (David was twenty-six) and for more than six months his family did not know what had happened to him—until his remains were found in a ditch in Texas. There was an eyewitness to the murder: Charles Harrelson’s girlfriend, who agreed to testify. For his defense, Harrelson hired Percy Foreman, then the most famous criminal lawyer in America. Despite the overwhelming evidence against him, Harrelson was acquitted. After burying his brother all those years ago, David Berg rarely talked about him. Yet in 2008 he began to remember and research Alan’s life and death. The result is Run, Brother, Run: part memoir—about growing up Jewish in 1950s Texas and Arkansas—and part legal story, informed by Berg’s experience as a seasoned lawyer. Writing with cold-eyed grief and a wild, lacerating humor, Berg tells us first about the striving Jewish family that created Alan Berg and set him on a course for self-destruction, and then about the miscarriage of justice when Berg’s murderer was acquitted. David Berg brings us a painful family history, a portrait of an iconic American place, and a true-crime courtroom murder drama that “elegantly brings to life the rough-and-tumble boomtown that was 1960s-era Houston, and conveys with unflinching force the emotional damage his brother’s death did to his family” (The New York Times).
Bella Mackie’s How to Kill Your Family is a darkly humorous debut novel that follows a cunning antihero as she gets her revenge. When I think about what I actually did, I feel somewhat sad that nobody will ever know about the complex operation that I undertook. Getting away with it is highly preferable, of course, but perhaps when I’m long gone, someone will open an old safe and find this confession. The public would reel. After all, almost nobody else in the world can possibly understand how someone, by the tender age of twenty-eight, can have calmly killed six members of her family. And then happily got on with the rest of her life, never to regret a thing. When Grace Bernard discovers her absentee millionaire father has rejected her dying mother’s pleas for help, she vows revenge and coldly sets out to get her retribution—by killing them all, one by one. Compulsively readable, Bella Mackie’s debut novel is driven by a captivating first-person narrator who talks of self-care and social media while calmly walking the reader through her increasingly baroque acts of murder. But then, Grace is imprisoned for a murder she didn’t commit. Outrageously funny, compulsive, and subversive, How to Kill Your Family is a wickedly dark romp about class, family, love . . . and murder. “Funny, sharp, dark, and twisted.” —Jojo Moyes
In a personal memoir, the author describes her relationships with the two men closest to her--her father and his brother, Joseph, a charismatic pastor with whom she lived after her parents emigrated from Haiti to the United States.
"Brother Love: Murder, Money, and a Messiah details the incredible rise and fall of Yahweh Ben Yahweh (born Hulon Mitchell, Jr.) and his Nation of Yahweh. In a section of town rotten with drugs and violence and torn apart by riots, this self-proclaimed messiah captivated thousands of black men and women who hungered for a leader. Under his rule they seemed able to bring order and discipline to a place where there had been none, and Yahweh Ben Yahweh was hailed as a savior of the ghetto by Miami's power elite. But the hope that the black messiah brought ended in turbulence and death. Yahweh Ben Yahweh's story reveals much about modern American opportunism and hypocrisy, violence and religious fanaticism, and the search for identity and solidarity in the midst of our ongoing racial malaise."--BOOK JACKET.Title Summary field provided by Blackwell North America, Inc. All Rights Reserved
“An intense snapshot of the chain reaction caused by pulling a trigger.” —Booklist (starred review) “Astonishing.” —Kirkus Reviews (starred review) “A tour de force.” —Publishers Weekly (starred review) A Newbery Honor Book A Coretta Scott King Honor Book A Printz Honor Book A Time Best YA Book of All Time (2021) A Los Angeles Times Book Prize Winner for Young Adult Literature Longlisted for the National Book Award for Young People’s Literature Winner of the Walter Dean Myers Award An Edgar Award Winner for Best Young Adult Fiction Parents’ Choice Gold Award Winner An Entertainment Weekly Best YA Book of 2017 A Vulture Best YA Book of 2017 A Buzzfeed Best YA Book of 2017 An ode to Put the Damn Guns Down, this is New York Times bestselling author Jason Reynolds’s electrifying novel that takes place in sixty potent seconds—the time it takes a kid to decide whether or not he’s going to murder the guy who killed his brother. A cannon. A strap. A piece. A biscuit. A burner. A heater. A chopper. A gat. A hammer A tool for RULE Or, you can call it a gun. That’s what fifteen-year-old Will has shoved in the back waistband of his jeans. See, his brother Shawn was just murdered. And Will knows the rules. No crying. No snitching. Revenge. That’s where Will’s now heading, with that gun shoved in the back waistband of his jeans, the gun that was his brother’s gun. He gets on the elevator, seventh floor, stoked. He knows who he’s after. Or does he? As the elevator stops on the sixth floor, on comes Buck. Buck, Will finds out, is who gave Shawn the gun before Will took the gun. Buck tells Will to check that the gun is even loaded. And that’s when Will sees that one bullet is missing. And the only one who could have fired Shawn’s gun was Shawn. Huh. Will didn’t know that Shawn had ever actually USED his gun. Bigger huh. BUCK IS DEAD. But Buck’s in the elevator? Just as Will’s trying to think this through, the door to the next floor opens. A teenage girl gets on, waves away the smoke from Dead Buck’s cigarette. Will doesn’t know her, but she knew him. Knew. When they were eight. And stray bullets had cut through the playground, and Will had tried to cover her, but she was hit anyway, and so what she wants to know, on that fifth floor elevator stop, is, what if Will, Will with the gun shoved in the back waistband of his jeans, MISSES. And so it goes, the whole long way down, as the elevator stops on each floor, and at each stop someone connected to his brother gets on to give Will a piece to a bigger story than the one he thinks he knows. A story that might never know an END…if Will gets off that elevator. Told in short, fierce staccato narrative verse, Long Way Down is a fast and furious, dazzlingly brilliant look at teenage gun violence, as could only be told by Jason Reynolds.
From the bestselling horror author of Within These Walls and The Bird Eater comes a terrifying novel that follows a teenager determined to break from his family’s unconventional—and deeply disturbing—traditions. Deep in the heart of Appalachia stands a crooked farmhouse miles from any road. The Morrows keep to themselves, and it’s served them well so far. When girls go missing off the side of the highway, the cops don’t knock on their door. Which is a good thing, seeing as to what’s buried in the Morrows’ backyard. But nineteen-year-old Michael Morrow isn’t like the rest of his family. He doesn’t take pleasure in the screams that echo through the trees. Michael pines for normalcy, and he’s sure that someday he’ll see the world beyond West Virginia. When he meets Alice, a pretty girl working at a record shop in the small nearby town of Dahlia, he’s immediately smitten. For a moment, he nearly forgets about the monster he’s become. But his brother, Rebel, is all too eager to remind Michael of his place…
From the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Small Great Things and the modern classics My Sister’s Keeper, The Storyteller, and more, comes a “complex, compassionate, and smart” (The Washington Post) novel about a family torn apart by a murder accusation. When your son can’t look you in the eye…does that mean he’s guilty? Jacob Hunt is a teen with Asperger’s syndrome. He’s hopeless at reading social cues or expressing himself well to others, though he is brilliant in many ways. He has a special focus on one subject—forensic analysis. A police scanner in his room clues him in to crime scenes, and he’s always showing up and telling the cops what to do. And he’s usually right. But when Jacob’s small hometown is rocked by a terrible murder, law enforcement comes to him. Jacob’s behaviors are hallmark Asperger’s, but they look a lot like guilt to the local police. Suddenly the Hunt family, who only want to fit in, are thrust directly in the spotlight. For Jacob’s mother, it’s a brutal reminder of the intolerance and misunderstanding that always threaten her family. For his brother, it’s another indication why nothing is normal because of Jacob. And for the frightened small town, the soul-searing question looms: Did Jacob commit murder? House Rules is “a provocative story in which [Picoult] explores the pain of trying to comprehend the people we love—and reminds us that the truth often travels in disguise” (People).
"This laugh-out-loud hilarious book is mandatory reading for parents, and should be taught in schools as the "cautionary tale" portion of Sex Ed. Run don't walk to buy it, and if you're a baby with lethal parents, crawl don't roll." --Rob Kutner (writer, The Daily Show, Conan, The Future According To Me) "Unlike babies themselves, copies of Jacob Sager Weinstein's book can be bought and sold on the open market. Buy two and bring joy and laughter to the lives of a copy-less couple." --Jose Arroyo (writer, Conan) "The "s-a-g-e" in Jacob's middle moniker indicates exactly that. He is a whimsically wise and hysterically funny fellow whom any child (or book buying adult) would be wise to listen to." --Dennis Miller "If you don't buy this book and then your baby dies, how are you going to feel? Pretty bad, I imagine." --Larry Doyle (writer, I Love You Beth Cooper; Go, Mutants!; The Simpsons) Have you ever read a parenting book that left you feeling inadequate and/or terrified? In other words, have you ever read any parenting book whatsoever? If so, you need How Not To Kill Your Baby, a hilarious parody of every fear-mongering, crazy-making pregnancy and parenting manual you've ever cringed over. Just consider the following advice: * "As you know if you have ever seen someone give birth in a movie or television show, all newborns emerge with adorable round faces, pudgy limbs, and twinkling eyes. If, by contrast, the nurse hands you a tiny, squawling creature with the face of an old man and skin covered in goo, hand it back immediately. There has clearly been some sort of mixup with a nearby ward for senile midgets." * "It's essential that you keep careful track of your baby's every bodily function. That way, when she is president of the United States and a paranoid-minded conspiracy movement springs up denying her eligibility for the position, you will have documentary proof that she did, in fact, poop on U.S. soil at 8:23AM on February 23." * "When choosing a nursery school, make sure to visit first, and ask the teachers about their educational philosophies. Then ask about their criminal records. If they insist they have none, you may need to keep asking, perhaps while shining a bright light in their face. Also, take their fingerprints, then follow them home from a discreet distance and go through their trash. Oh, and don't forget to thank them for their dedication to helping the young!" * "It is easy to adjust your parenting techniques as your children grow: simply do and say the exact same things, but raise your voice by one decibel for every year of your child's age." How Not To Kill Your Baby is printed on child-safe, 100% piranha-free paper, and bound without the use of exploding staples. You'll get no such promise from What To Expect When You're Expecting. How Not To Kill Your Baby is the book for you... unless you're some kind of baby-hating creep who wants to parent all wrong.
