Love and Freedom

Love and Freedom

Author: Jorge N. Ferrer

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield

Published: 2021-06-24

Total Pages: 213

ISBN-13: 153815658X

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In Love and Freedom, Jorge Ferrer proposes a paradigm shift in how romantic relationships are conceptualized, a step forward in the evolution of modern relationships. In the same way that the transgender movement surmounted the gender binary, Ferrer defines how a parallel step can—and should—be taken with the relational style binary. This book offers the first systematic discussion of relationship modes beyond monogamy and polyamory, as well as introduces the notion of “relational freedom” as the capability to choose one’s relational style free from biological, psychological, and sociocultural conditionings. To achieve these goals, Ferrer first discusses a number of critical categories—specifically, monopride/polyphobia, and polypride/monophobia—that mediate the contemporary “mono–poly wars,” that is, the predicament of mutual competition among monogamists and polyamorists. The ideological nature of these “mono–poly wars” is demonstrated through a review of available empirical literature on the psychological health and relationship quality of monogamous and polyamorous individuals and couples. Then, after showing how monogamy and polyamory ultimately reinforce each other, Ferrer articulates three relational pathways to living in-between, through, and beyond the mono/poly binary: fluidity, hybridity, and transcendence. Moving beyond that binary opens a fuzzy, liminal, and multivocal relational space that Ferrer calls novogamy. In this groundbreaking book, readers will learn practical tools to not only transform jealousy, but also enhance their relational freedom while being aware of key issues of diversity and social justice. They will also learn novel criteria to evaluate the success of their intimate relationships, and be introduced to a transformed vision of romantic love beyond both monocentrism and emerging polynormativities.


Love's Refraction

Love's Refraction

Author: Jillian Deri

Publisher: University of Toronto Press

Published: 2015-01-01

Total Pages: 164

ISBN-13: 1442628693

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In Love's Refraction, Jillian Deri explores the distinctive question of how and why polyamorists – people who practice consensual non-monogamy – manage jealousy. Her focus is on the polyamorist concept of “compersion” – taking pleasure in a lover's other romantic and sexual encounters.


The Jealousy Workbook

The Jealousy Workbook

Author: Kathy Labriola

Publisher: SCB Distributors

Published: 2013-09-13

Total Pages: 157

ISBN-13: 0937609641

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From the initial stages of trying to agree who can do what with whom, through advanced issues such as coping with logistics and seeking compersion, every relationship sooner or later confronts jealousy – and some relationships do not survive the confrontation. Between these covers you will find forty-two exercises with supporting text, developed by a professional relationship counselor and refined by hundreds of clients trying to find their own paths through jealousy. They range from basic (Exercise Two, Clarify Your Relationship Orientation) through challenging (Exercise Thirty-Four, Imagine Looking Through Their Eyes and Being In Their Shoes). All can be done solo, with a partner, or under the supervision of a helping professional, and all can be done before a problem emerges or in the throes of a jealousy crisis. Along the way, you will find solutions to the issues that bedevil even the most happily open relationships.


Compersion

Compersion

Author: Hypatia from Space

Publisher: Independently Published

Published: 2018-05-07

Total Pages: 284

ISBN-13: 9781980465904

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Compersion can be defined as the opposite of jealousy. Hypatia, famous polyamorous blogger and inspirational writer, has intensively focused her research on this feeling somewhat unknown to most people. Through her careful research as well as her personal experience, she has come to the conclusion that compersion is within the reach of every polyamorous individual. However, this feeling of joy towards the happiness of our partners does not happen by chance, or without effort. Her hypothesis: Each polyamorous has specific individual needs that, once fulfilled, allow them to experience a solid and lasting sentiment of compersion. Hypatia warmly invites the reader on a journey of self-discovery to explore their inner selves to see what their essential compersion needs are. She also addresses the fundamental topic of how one can successfully support their partners and metamours in their own journey towards this liberating experience. Last, not least, she evokes the state of mind necessary for those who wish to develop, or integrate more fully, compersion into their lives. Controlling jealousy is great, but cultivating compersion is way better!


The Many Faces of Polyamory

The Many Faces of Polyamory

Author: Magdalena J. Fosse

Publisher: Routledge

Published: 2021-05-23

Total Pages: 277

ISBN-13: 135138113X

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The Many Faces of Polyamory: Longing and Belonging in Concurrent Relationships provides new perspectives on polyamory and the longing to belong in the relatively uncharted territory of nonnormative relationships. This volume offers a valuable and compelling account on how to approach polyamorous relationships from the clinical perspective. While there is no uniform answer, Dr. Fosse’s compassionate and discerning approach that combines relative neutrality, an open-minded embrace of nontraditional lifestyle choices, and skilful attention to countertransference dynamics is likely to be inspiring. Dr. Fosse exposes the dynamics of love, sex, jealousy, and compersion as they play out in lives of those interested in polyamory, and more broadly, consensual nonmonogamy. Her focus is on relationships worth having. With its nuanced clinical focus, The Many Faces of Polyamory will be an essential resource for psychotherapists, educators, students, and anyone inside and outside of the mental health field drawn to the intricacies of sexuality, intimacy, and how they are intertwined with relational satisfaction


Love In Abundance

Love In Abundance

Author: Kathy Labriola

Publisher: SCB Distributors

Published: 2011-03-28

Total Pages: 200

ISBN-13: 0937609471

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Beyond the basics of polyamory lies a complex web of negotiations, agreements, pitfalls and rewards. Kathy Labriola, a relationships counselor who has worked for many years with singles, couples and groups in polyamorous and open relationships, sets forth some of the realities of alternative lifestyles: dealing with some of the common relationship-disrupters, managing jealousy, choosing compatible partners, combining BDSM with polyamory, distinguishing between sex addiction and polyamory, and much more.


The Emotions

The Emotions

Author: Peter Goldie

Publisher: Oxford University Press

Published: 2002-08

Total Pages: 276

ISBN-13: 9780199253043

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Peter Goldie opens the path to a deeper understanding of our emotional lives through a lucid philosophical exploration of this surprisingly neglected topic. He illuminates the phenomena of emotion by drawing not only on philosophy but also on literature and science. He considers the roles of culture and evolution in the development of our emotional capabilities. He examines the links between emotion, mood, and character, and places the emotions in the context of such related phenomena as consciousness, thought, feeling, and imagination. He explains how it is that we are able to make sense of our own and other people's emotions, and how we can explain the very human things which emotions lead us to do. A key theme of The Emotions is the idea of a personal perspective or point of view, contrasted with the impersonal stance of the empirical sciences. Goldie argues that it is only from the personal point of view that thoughts, reasons, feelings, and actions come into view. He suggests that there is a tendency for philosophers to over-intellectualize the emotions, and investigates how far it is possible to explain emotions in terms of rationality. Over-intellectualizing can also involve neglecting the centrality of feelings, and Goldie shows how to put them where they belong, as part of the intentionality of emotional experience, directed towards the world from a point of view. Goldie argues that the various elements of emotional experience—including thought, feeling, bodily change, and expression—are tied together in a narrative structure. To make sense of one's emotional life one has to see it as part of a larger unfolding narrative. The narrative is not simply an interpretative framework of a life: it is what that life is. Goldie concludes by applying these ideas in a close study of one particular emotion: jealousy. This fascinating book gives an accessible but penetrating exploration of a subject that is important but mysterious to all of us. Any reader interested in emotion, and its role in our understanding of our lives, will find much to think about here.


Love

Love

Author: Ronald De Sousa

Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA

Published: 2015

Total Pages: 153

ISBN-13: 019966384X

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Explores the philosophical notion of love, and argues that love is more complex than conventional thought would have us believe.


Jealousy Survival Guide

Jealousy Survival Guide

Author: Kitty Chambliss

Publisher:

Published: 2017-10-31

Total Pages: 104

ISBN-13: 9781978247871

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Jealousy can have an enormous impact on some people, so it is no surprise that people (especially those who practice consensual non-monogamy) think, talk, and write about it quite a bit. In "Jealousy Survival Guide", Kitty Chambliss does the homework for you and collects the best tidbits on life and emotions to give you inspiration and provide tools to gain and practice new skills. Combining her own life experience with these pearls of wisdom, Kitty focuses on jealousy in consensually non-monogamous relationships, what it is, how it expresses, and specific ways to manage it. Kitty's frank discussion of her own struggles with jealousy and focus on specific skills and techniques - without a shred of blame - makes "Jealousy Survival Guide" a delightfully useful read for anyone struggling with jealousy or consensually non-monogamous relationships and polyamory. This is a comprehensive guidebook and step-by-step template for recognizing feelings of jealousy and insecurity as they come up with effective tools for sorting through those emotions, and when, if, and how to bring up challenging or potentially emotionally charged conversations with loved ones. What People are Saying about "Jealousy Survival Guide""I'm only a few chapters into Kitty's 'Jealousy Survival Guide' but have already felt the positive impact her book has had on me personally. Her book has helped me recognize some of the reasons I am the person I am today and areas of my personality which can use improvement. This book covers so much more than jealousy and relationships. It allows for the discovery of oneself and helps pave an optimistic path for growth. I look forward to what the remaining chapters have in store for me and the journey ahead!"- Tina C., Relationship Coaching ClientNote: Kindle version also available. Audible coming soon.


The Polyamory Breakup Book

The Polyamory Breakup Book

Author: Kathy Labriola

Publisher:

Published: 2019

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781944934811

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Labriola uses real life examples and expert insight as a counselor and nurse. From how to handle jealousy to the practicalities of managing money and time with multiple partners, this book includes tips and insights from the polyamory community.