Break free from toxic relationships once and for all. Dating is challenging enough in general, but if you’ve been through the emotional meat grinder of a toxic relationship, then it is even more difficult. You may struggle with fear and self-doubt, and you may wonder if it’s even possible for you to trust again, let alone fall in love. You may get all kinds of well-intended or invalidating bad advice, such as “you need to let down your guard and love like you’ve never been hurt” or “not every man (or woman) out there is like your ex”. You want to believe what these people say, but deep down, you have so many questions and you doubt your own judgment. In Dear Dana: FAQs About Dating After Narcissistic Abuse, you will discover: How to stop attracting narcissists What makes a relationship dysfunctional What makes a relationship healthy Red flags in online dating Early red flags of abuse When to tell your new partner about your abusive ex How to tell the difference between listening to your fear and listening to your intuition How to know when you are ready to date again How to know if your standards are too high And much more.
Lying. Cheating. Manipulating. Will they ever change? What will it take to get through to them? They apologized, but will this time be different...or will they just get better at hiding what they are up to? This book will help you get out of the fog of confusion and into the clarity you are looking for. FOG is an acronym that stands for "Fear, Obligation, and Guilt." These three emotions are often at the core of manipulation, and are often how narcissists, sociopaths, and other types of emotional manipulators go about controlling their targets. However, this type of destructive manipulation isn't just limited to narcissists and sociopaths. There is no shortage of people with well-intended bad advice out there who unintentionally fall into the FOG as well, and push targets of abuse into keeping the relationship going. The FOG is one of the main reasons that people stay "stuck" in abusive relationships for so long, why they continue to get involved with abusive people, why they feel that they are the problem, and why they tend to feel that the abuse is somehow their fault. When a person is being manipulated they have a hard time figuring out who has the problem, what is normal, what is problematic, and if their wants, needs, and feelings are valid. The disasterous effects of being lost in the FOG are confusion, crazymaking, people pleasing, and an erosion of boundaries. What makes this well-intended bad advice so damaging is that, on the surface, it seems like good advice--especially if it's coming from people who seem to have our best interests in mind, such as friends, family, church members, support group members, or a therapist. Some examples of this well-intended bad advice that comes from other people is: "Who are you to judge?" "No one is perfect." "You need to forgive them." "She's your mother, you need to have a relationship with her...she's not getting any younger you know." "Commitment is forever." What can be so crazymaking for targets is that they are often getting two very different messages. On one hand, they are told that they need to work towards a solution, and on the other, they are told that need to leave a partner who lies, cheats, steals, hits, yells, or belittles them. This book compares and contrasts of these concepts so that targets of any type of manipulation and abuse can make a more empowered decision. Some of the concepts covered are: Who are You to Judge vs. Being Discerning No One is Perfect vs. Tolerating Abuse You Need to Forgive Them vs. Keeping Yourself Safe A Parent vs. A Predator Commitment vs. Codependency Self-love vs. Selfishness A Person Acting the Part vs. A Person Actually Changing Gut Instincts vs. Hypervigilance A Friend vs. Someone Being Friendly Caring vs. Caretaking Being in Love With Them vs. Being in Love With Who They Pretended to Be Workable Behavior vs. Deal Breakers Acceptance vs. Allowance Going Through So Much Together vs. Being Put Through So Much By Them Sincerity vs. Intensity Healthy Bonding vs. Trauma Bonding Insincere Remorse vs. Sincere Remorse Reacting vs. Responding ...and many more.
Are you in a relationship or dynamic with a person that can be best described as an emotional rollercoaster, toxic, draining, crazy-making, or confusing? Have you wondered why they never seem to change--no matter how much you are willing to do for them, or how much love, understanding, rehab, religion, therapy, second (or twenty-second) chances you've given them? Do you feel as though if you tried harder that eventually you could earn their love, respect, loyalty, honesty, or be treated with dignity and respect? If so, you are not alone and this book is a great place to start. This book covers: - The most common words and definitions (along with examples) surrounding narcissists, sociopaths, and narcissistic abuse, such as "flying monkeys," "hoovering," "narcissistic abuse," "love bombing," "trauma bonding," "C-PTSD," "scapegoat," and "reactive abuse," as well as dozens of additional helpful words and concepts. - Understanding the cycle of narcissistic abuse (and what is really looks like in motion). - The different ways that emotional manipulators go about exploiting your vulnerabilities. - Frequently asked questions about narcissistic abuse. - Elements to consider if you are planning to leave so you can do it as safely as possible. - What to anticipate after breaking up with a narcissist, sociopath, psychopath, or any other type of emotional manipulator. - How to find a support group and privacy concerns to consider when joining one. - A section for friends and family for how to help support a loved one who is in a narcissistically abusive relationship or dynamic. And much, much more.
EBONY is the flagship magazine of Johnson Publishing. Founded in 1945 by John H. Johnson, it still maintains the highest global circulation of any African American-focused magazine.
Winner of the Labriola Center American Indian National Book Award Despite what major media sources say, violence against Native women is not an epidemic. An epidemic is biological and blameless. Violence against Native women is historical and political, bounded by oppression and colonial violence. This book, like all of Sarah Deer’s work, is aimed at engaging the problem head-on—and ending it. The Beginning and End of Rape collects and expands the powerful writings in which Deer, who played a crucial role in the reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act in 2013, has advocated for cultural and legal reforms to protect Native women from endemic sexual violence and abuse. Deer provides a clear historical overview of rape and sex trafficking in North America, paying particular attention to the gendered legacy of colonialism in tribal nations—a truth largely overlooked or minimized by Native and non-Native observers. She faces this legacy directly, articulating strategies for Native communities and tribal nations seeking redress. In a damning critique of federal law that has accommodated rape by destroying tribal legal systems, she describes how tribal self-determination efforts of the twenty-first century can be leveraged to eradicate violence against women. Her work bridges the gap between Indian law and feminist thinking by explaining how intersectional approaches are vital to addressing the rape of Native women. Grounded in historical, cultural, and legal realities, both Native and non-Native, these essays point to the possibility of actual and positive change in a world where Native women are systematically undervalued, left unprotected, and hurt. Deer draws on her extensive experiences in advocacy and activism to present specific, practical recommendations and plans of action for making the world safer for all.
The quality of your life depends largely on the degree of self-awareness that you have. If your life isn't running as smoothly as you'd like, then perhaps taking a few steps back and asking yourself some thought-provoking questions will help. This book includes over 150 questions organized by different facets of your life: personal, emotional, physical, spiritual, and financial. Get the clarity you need in order to move forward and create the best life possible. Most people feel like they know themselves pretty well. But what if you could know yourself just a little bit better—and with this small improvement, get a big payoff…not just in your career, but in your life? Research shows that self-awareness—knowing who we are and how others see us—is the foundation for high performance, smart choices, and lasting relationships. There’s just one problem: most people don’t see themselves quite as clearly as they could. Get ready to feel inspired from the inside out and embark on an adventure of self-discovery. 150+ Questions for Self-Awareness illuminates a path to inner transformation that delivers the positive, feel-good experiences that you have been looking for. Become more aware of how you think and feel today to live a more empowered life - NOW!
Providing therapists practical solutions to managed care's erosion of their freedom to practice, this book presents a working blueprint for a private-pay psychotherapy practice. Dana C. Ackley casts out the distortions that have crept into many clinicians' thinking as a result of reliance on third-party reimbursement. Based on his own experience, he shows how you can serve clients--and yourself--better by developing real alternatives to the pressures and bureaucracy of managed care. In clear step-by-step detail, including practical exercises and checklists, sample marketing materials, and payment plans, the volume shows you how to: *Rediscover the economic and clinical value of your work *Discard assumptions that might block your progress *Educate yourself about the needs of potential clients *Market and sell your services effectively *Learn ethical, reasonable business-of-practice skills *Diversify into the rewarding area of psychological consultation to businesses. No matter what your clinical style, theoretical orientation, or practice history, you will benefit from the hard-won lessons Dr. Ackley shares in this book.
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful book on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused. These people are well liked, they are often the pillars of the community. Parents, spouses, bosses, and friends who are covert narcissists come across as the nicest people. They can be spiritual leaders, they are moms who bring over casseroles to needy people, they are the bosses that everyone loves and feels so lucky to work for. These relationships are incredibly confusing and damaging. They leave you questioning your own sanity and reality. Even though they are treating you terribly, you wonder if you are the problem, if you are the one to blame. You are filled with constant self-doubt when it comes to these people in your life. When you are around them you feel confused and muddled inside. You have a hard time seeing clearly. These relationships can bring you to a state of deep depression and complete depletion of energy. You may wonder if you will ever see clearly and heal from these destructive and debilitating relationships. This book will give you hope that you can heal and feel alive again, or maybe for the first time. You will learn what the traits of a covert narcissist are as well as how they control and manipulate. Your eyes will open and your experience will be validated. You will also learn ways to heal and actually enjoy life again. Debbie Mirza uses decades of her own experience with covert narcissists as well as her years of practice as a life coach who specializes in helping people recover and heal from these types of relationships.
She thought, brightly, This is the worst life decision I have ever made! And she marvelled at herself for a while, at the mystery of this person who’d just done this bizarre, inexplicable thing. Margot meets Robert. They exchange numbers. They text, flirt and eventually have sex – the type of sex you attempt to forget. How could one date go so wrong? Everything that takes place in Cat Person happens to countless people every day. But Cat Person is not an everyday story. In less than a week, Kristen Roupenian’s New Yorker debut became the most read and shared short story in their website’s history. This is the bad date that went viral. This is the conversation we’re all having. This gift edition contains photographs by celebrated photographer Elinor Carucci, who was commissioned by the New Yorker to capture the image that accompanied Kristen Roupenian’s Cat Person when it appeared in the magazine. You Know You Want This, Kristen Roupenian’s debut collection, will be published in February 2019.
