Loving through Your Differences

Loving through Your Differences

Author: James L. Creighton

Publisher: New World Library

Published: 2019-02-05

Total Pages: 202

ISBN-13: 1608685667

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FIND HAPPINESS AND FULFILLMENT THROUGH — RATHER THAN DESPITE — YOUR DIFFERENCES Dr. James Creighton has worked with couples for decades, facilitating communication and conflict resolution and teaching them the tools to build healthy, happy relationships. He has found that many couples start out believing they like the same things, see people the same way, and share a united take on the world. But inevitably differences crop up, and it can be profoundly discouraging to find that one's partner sees a person, situation, or decision completely differently. Although many relationships flounder at this point, Creighton shows that this can actually be an opportunity to forge stronger ties. In Loving through Your Differences, he draws on the latest research in cognitive science and developmental psychology to show how we invent our realities with our perceptual minds. He then provides clear, concrete tools for shifting our perceptions and reframing our responses. The result moves couples out of the fear and alienation of "your way or my way" and into a deep understanding of the other that allows for an "our way." As Creighton shows, this way of being together, based on the reality of individuality rather than the illusion of sameness, sets the stage for long-term excitement, discovery, and fulfillment.


Conflict in Intimate Relationships

Conflict in Intimate Relationships

Author: Dudley D. Cahn

Publisher: Guilford Press

Published: 1992-09-26

Total Pages: 164

ISBN-13: 9780898629828

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Why is the potential for conflict so great for intimate partners? This volume integrates research from psychology, sociology, communications, and family studies to provide a comprehensive, practical synthesis of findings concerning conflict in close personal relationships. Combining discussion of both theory and practice, the volume illuminates why conflict occurs frequently between friends, romantic partners, distressed couples, and divorcing spouses, and also offers professionals a framework for understanding conflict as they try to help defuse strife. The book establishes conflict as a process that lies dormant in any mutually dependent relationship. Depending on the partners' strategies in conflict, the potential for disagreement can quickly become a real obstacle between them and can even threaten to end the relationship. To better determine the source of stress, three different research paradigms are presented to explain the conflict process and why it occurs, as well as to suggest what can be done to help partners manage conflict and preserve intimacy. The systems-interactionists' approach is presented first. This section discusses methods used to characterize destructive and constructive communication behavior patterns and strategies for dispute resolution. Next, the rules-interventionist approach examines ways in which a mediator can help divorcing couples end one relationship and begin another. Finally, the cognitive-exchange approach is considered. Methods used to determine the antecedent conditions which influence partners' reactions during conflict are presented and approaches for helping them modify destructive communication strategies are discussed. Throughout, terminology and measurements are made to correspond across disciplines so that the work is accessible to all. In addition to relating particular studies and research programs to their appropriate research approaches, the book shows how conflict is uniquely handled when distressed partners engage in problem solving, when disputing partners engage in mediation, and when same and opposite sex partners participate in developing relationships. Comparison and contrast emphasize the role played by conflict communication behavior, rules, and strategies found in developing intimate relationships, the destructive conflict characteristic of emotionally distressed couples, and the bargaining/negotiation characteristic of formal mediation. Drawing together the wide array of research on the topic in a user-friendly format, this book is an ideal resource for any investigator interested in distressed relationships. Offering practical methodology firmly founded in theory, it is invaluable reading for clinicians working with people in conflict. The book also serves as a text for advanced undergraduate and graduate students of conflict in interpersonal relationships, and as supplementary reading for a variety of courses where conflict is a focus of study.


Communicating Interpersonal Conflict in Close Relationships

Communicating Interpersonal Conflict in Close Relationships

Author: Jennifer A. Samp

Publisher: Routledge

Published: 2016-09-01

Total Pages: 319

ISBN-13: 1317683803

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Communicating Interpersonal Conflict in Close Relationships: Contexts, Challenges, and Opportunities provides a state-of-the-art review of research on conflict in close personal relationships. This volume brings together both seasoned and new voices in communication research to address the challenges in evaluating conflict. Contributors review the current state of research on themes related to power, serial arguments, interpersonal and family dynamics, physiological processes, and mechanisms of forgiveness by presenting theoretical reviews, original unpublished data-driven research, and discussions about the methodological challenges and opportunities in studying interpersonal conflict. An essential resource for graduate students and faculty interested in interpersonal conflict in close relationships between romantic partners, families, or friends, this volume is intended for advanced coursework and individual study in communication, social psychology, and close relationship scholarship.


Wired for Love

Wired for Love

Author: Stan Tatkin

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2024-06-01

Total Pages: 332

ISBN-13: 1648482988

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"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.


The Oxford Handbook of Close Relationships

The Oxford Handbook of Close Relationships

Author: Jeffry A. Simpson

Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA

Published: 2013-05-02

Total Pages: 866

ISBN-13: 0195398696

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This book provides an in-depth and comprehensive summary of the psychology of close relationships, and showcases classic and contemporary theories, models, and empirical research that have been conducted in the field.


Why Marriages Succeed or Fail

Why Marriages Succeed or Fail

Author: John Gottman

Publisher: A&C Black

Published: 2012-04-12

Total Pages: 236

ISBN-13: 1408834448

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Psychologist and top marriage guru John Gottman has spent twenty years studying what makes a marriage last - now you can use his tested methods to evaluate, strengthen and maintain your long-term relationship. This ground-breaking book will enable you to see where your strengths and weaknesses lie, what specific actions you can take to improve your marriage and how to avoid the damaging patterns that can lead to divorce. It includes: - Practical exercises and techniques that will allow you to understand and make the most of your relationship - Ways to recognise and overcome the attitudes that doom a marriage - Questionnaires that will help you evaluate your relationship - Case studies and anecdotes from real life throughout


The Four Laws of Love

The Four Laws of Love

Author: Jimmy Evans

Publisher: XO Publishing

Published: 2020-02-11

Total Pages: 251

ISBN-13:

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The Four Laws of Love represents the culmination of Jimmy Evans’ influential career. In this deeply personal book, Jimmy Evans outlines the foundational pillars upon which God designed marriage. Without holding back, he tells the story of his own marriage, which was hurtling toward divorce until this self-proclaimed “bad husband” came to recognize and put into practice these four laws. This book sounds a wake-up call for every kind of marriage, including those that are barely surviving and those that seem to operate on autopilot. Couples who follow these simple guidelines ― recognizing the original intent and purpose of marriage―will inject new life into their unions. They’ll see hurting marriages find healing and watch good marriages become great. Each revitalized relationship will play a part in restoring marriage to its sacred role at the center of human civilization.


Close Relationships

Close Relationships

Author: Clyde Hendrick

Publisher: SAGE

Published: 2000

Total Pages: 506

ISBN-13: 9780761916062

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'The authors ...extend the reach of their comprehensive reviews into theoretically driven and innovating explorations. The scope of coverage across and within chapters is striking. The developmentalist, the methodologist, the feminist, the contextualist, and the cross-culturalist alike will find satisfaction in reading the chapters' - Catherine A Surra, University of Texas, Austin The science of close relationships is relatively new and complex. This volume has 26 chapters organized into four thematic areas: relationship methods, forms, processes, and threats, as well as a foreword and an epilogue.


Adult Attachment

Adult Attachment

Author: W. Steven Rholes

Publisher: Guilford Press

Published: 2004-07-12

Total Pages: 482

ISBN-13: 9781593850470

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With contributions from leading investigators, this volume presents important theoretical and empirical advances in the study of adult attachment. Chapters take stock of the state of knowledge in the field and introduce new, testable theoretical models to guide future research. Major topics covered include stability and change of attachment orientations across the lifespan; influences of attachment on cognitive functioning; and implications for the ways individuals experience intimacy, conflict, caregiving, and satisfaction in adult relationships. Also explored are the ways attachment theory and research can inform therapy with couples and can further understanding of such significant clinical problems as PTSD and depression.