Calming Upset People with Ear

Calming Upset People with Ear

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2021-05-11

Total Pages: 160

ISBN-13: 9781950057207

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The level of stress and conflict in today's world is higher than seen in decades. We all can use tools for managing the emotions this has caused. At the same time, there also appear to be more "high conflict" people who are preoccupied with blaming others and verbally venting or attacking those around them. Yet, these upset emotions and conflicts can often be calmed immediately through the use of a simple EAR Statement(TM), a method developed and refined by Bill Eddy over the past fifteen years and taught to hundreds of thousands of professionals and individuals. Following on the success of his widely-known BIFF Response(R) method and books, this new book by Bill Eddy on EAR Statements will come in handy in all kinds of upset situations: family conflicts, workplace disputes, neighbor controversies, and any other setting. A simple statement communicating empathy, attention and/or respect to an angry, sad, mentally ill or any upset person at any time can work wonders in minutes. Yet it's not as easy as it looks. It takes practice and this book gives over twenty examples of applying this method in families, communities, customer relations, volunteer organizations, public service, politics, business, police encounters, racial conflicts, schools, mental health settings, and others. Empathy, attention and respect are what all people are looking for, especially when upset or in a conflict. This book will give you the details of how to calm upset people with EAR every day.


Biff

Biff

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2011-05

Total Pages: 158

ISBN-13: 1936268353

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This little book gives more than 20 examples of BIFF responses--brief, informative, friendly, and firm--for all areas of life, plus additional tips to help readers deal with high-conflict people anywhere. 158 pp.


High Conflict People in Legal Disputes

High Conflict People in Legal Disputes

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2012-03-30

Total Pages: 274

ISBN-13: 1936268000

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An easy and practical book for legal professionals or anyone else disputing with someone with a high-conflict personality.


It's All Your Fault!

It's All Your Fault!

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2012-02

Total Pages: 370

ISBN-13: 1936268027

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Provides answers for keeping everyday problems in the workplace, family or neighborhood from becoming "high-conflict" disputes.


5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life

5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2018-02-06

Total Pages: 208

ISBN-13: 1524705098

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Some difficult people aren’t just hard to deal with—they’re dangerous. Do you know someone whose moods swing wildly? Do they act unreasonably suspicious or antagonistic? Do they blame others for their own problems? When a high-conflict person has one of five common personality disorders—borderline, narcissistic, paranoid, antisocial, or histrionic—they can lash out in risky extremes of emotion and aggression. And once an HCP decides to target you, they’re hard to shake. But there are ways to protect yourself. Using empathy-driven conflict management techniques, Bill Eddy, a lawyer and therapist with extensive mediation experience, will teach you to: - Spot warning signs of the five high-conflict personalities in others and in yourself. - Manage relationships with HCPs at work and in your private life. - Safely avoid or end dangerous and stressful interactions with HCPs. Filled with expert advice and real-life anecdotes, 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life is an essential guide to helping you escape negative relationships, build healthy connections, and safeguard your reputation and personal life in the process. And if you have a high-conflict personality, this book will help you help yourself.


BIFF for Co-Parents

BIFF for Co-Parents

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2020-09-29

Total Pages: 200

ISBN-13: 9781950057108

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In divorce and co-parenting, not only do parents need to deal with their own emotions, they may be faced with a daily barrages of hostile calls, texts, social media blasts, and/or emails. How can you regain a sense of control and peace for your own sake and for the kids? For more than a decade, the BIFF method of responding to hostile and misinforming emails, texts and conversations, has grown in use by thousands of people dealing with a person with a high conflict personality. This third book in the BIFF Communication series is especially devoted to parents dealing with issues in and after separation and divorce as they co-parent their children, complete with instructions in the four-step BIFF method and numerous examples for dealing with co-parent situations. When parents use this approach, not only do they feel good about their end of the written or verbal conversation, but it tends to influence the other parent to communicate more productively as well. While it's simple and practical, it's not natural for most of us because we are hooked by the emotional intensity. This book can help you reduce the conflict and regain your sanity by learning what to write and what not to write. Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm. The BIFF is a communication game changer--it works!


Mediating High Conflict Disputes

Mediating High Conflict Disputes

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2021-05-06

Total Pages: 232

ISBN-13: 9781950057214

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High conflict mediation requires a paradigm shift from traditional mediation--high conflict experts Bill Eddy and Michael Lomax show you how. Over the past ten years the authors have been developing and practicing tips for managing high conflict clients in mediation, which is now a fully developed new method called New Ways for Mediation(R).Mediating High Conflict Disputes gives all of the little tips which any mediator can use, as well as the step-by-step structure of the New Ways for Mediation method for those who want to have better control of the process in high conflict cases--or any cases. Bill Eddy is primarily a family mediator in San Diego, California, with a worldwide reputation for training mediators, lawyers, judges and counselors in methods for working with clients with "high conflict" personality disorders or traits. Michael Lomax is a mediator dealing with family, workplace, military and government agency disputes in British Columbia, Canada. Both have provided training in this method for High Conflict Institute over the past ten years. This book is divided into three parts: Part 1 provides a thorough explanation of the thinking and behavior of parties with high conflict personalities, with an emphasis on what does not work and should be avoided. Part 2 provides a detailed description of the New Ways for Mediation method, including several paradigm shifts in each step of the process for greater success. Its similarities and differences with interest-based negotiations and transformative mediation methods are explained. Part 3 includes numerous examples describing cases with special issues in several settings, including family, workplace, and disputes involving government agencies.


Why We Elect Narcissists and Sociopaths—And How We Can Stop!

Why We Elect Narcissists and Sociopaths—And How We Can Stop!

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers

Published: 2019-05-21

Total Pages: 225

ISBN-13: 1523085282

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Bestselling author, therapist, lawyer, and mediator Bill Eddy describes how dangerous, high-conflict personalities have gained power in governments worldwide—and what citizens can do to keep these people out of office. Democracy is under siege. The reason isn't politics but personalities: too many countries have come under the sway of high-conflict people (HCPs) who have become politicians. Most of these high-conflict politicians have traits of narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial (i.e., sociopathic) personality disorder, or both. This is the first and only guide for identifying and thwarting them. HCPs don't avoid conflict, they thrive on it, widening social divisions and exacerbating international tensions. Eddy, the world's leading authority on high-conflict personalities, explains why they're so seductive and describes the telltale traits that define HCPs—he even includes a helpful list of forty typical HCP behaviors. Drawing on historical examples from Hitler, Stalin, Mao, and Nixon to Trump, Maduro, and Putin, Eddy shows how HCPs invent enemies and manufacture phony crises so they can portray themselves as the sole heroic figure who can deal with them, despite their inability to actually solve problems. He describes the best ways to expose HCPs as the charlatans they are, reply to their empty and misleading promises, and find genuine leaders to support. Eddy brings his deep psychotherapeutic experience to bear on a previously unidentified phenomena that presents a real threat to the world.


The Happiest Baby on the Block

The Happiest Baby on the Block

Author: Harvey Karp, M.D.

Publisher: Bantam

Published: 2008-11-19

Total Pages: 250

ISBN-13: 0307485803

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Perfect for expecting parents who want to provide a soothing home for the newest member of their family, The Happiest Baby on the Block, the national bestseller by respected pediatrician and child development expert Dr. Harvey Karp, is a revolutionary method for calming a crying infant and promoting healthy sleep from day one. In perhaps the most important parenting book of the decade, Dr. Harvey Karp reveals an extraordinary treasure sought by parents for centuries --an automatic “off-switch” for their baby’s crying. No wonder pediatricians across the country are praising him and thousands of Los Angeles parents, from working moms to superstars like Madonna and Pierce Brosnan, have turned to him to learn the secrets for making babies happy. Never again will parents have to stand by helpless and frazzled while their poor baby cries and cries. Dr. Karp has found there IS a remedy for colic. “I share with parents techniques known only to the most gifted baby soothers throughout history …and I explain exactly how they work.” In a innovative and thought-provoking reevaluation of early infancy, Dr. Karp blends modern science and ancient wisdom to prove that newborns are not fully ready for the world when they are born. Through his research and experience, he has developed four basic principles that are crucial for understanding babies as well as improving their sleep and soothing their senses: ·The Missing Fourth Trimester: as odd as it may sound, one of the main reasons babies cry is because they are born three months too soon. ·The Calming Reflex: the automatic reset switch to stop crying of any baby in the first few months of life. ·The 5 “S’s”: the simple steps (swaddling, side/stomach position, shushing, swinging and sucking) that trigger the calming reflex. For centuries, parents have tried these methods only to fail because, as with a knee reflex, the calming reflex only works when it is triggered in precisely the right way. Unlike other books that merely list these techniques Dr. Karp teaches parents exactly how to do them, to guide cranky infants to calm and easy babies to serenity in minutes…and help them sleep longer too. ·The Cuddle Cure: the perfect mix the 5 “S’s” that can soothe even the most colicky of infants. In the book, Dr. Karp also explains: What is colic? Why do most babies get much more upset in the evening? How can a parent calm a baby--in mere minutes? Can babies be spoiled? When should a parent of a crying baby call the doctor? How can a parent get their baby to sleep a few hours longer? Even the most loving moms and dads sometimes feel pushed to the breaking point by their infant’s persistent cries. Coming to the rescue, however, Dr. Karp places in the hands of parents, grandparents, and all childcare givers the tools they need to be able to calm their babies almost as easily as…turning off a light. From the Hardcover edition.


The Angry Therapist

The Angry Therapist

Author: John Kim

Publisher: Parallax Press

Published: 2017-04-18

Total Pages: 170

ISBN-13: 1941529623

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Tackling relationships, career, and family issues, John Kim, LMFT, thinks of himself as a life-styledesigner, not a therapist. His radical new approach, that he sometimes calls “self-help in a shot glass” is easy, real, and to the point. He helps people make changes to their lives so that personal growth happens organically, just by living. Let’s face it, therapy is a luxury. Few of us have the time or money to devote to going to an office every week. With anecdotes illustrating principles in action (in relatable and sometimes irreverent fashion) and stand-alone practices and exercises, Kim gives readers the tools and directions to focus on what's right with them instead of what's wrong. When John Kim was going through the end of a relationship, he began blogging as The Angry Therapist, documenting his personal journey post-divorce. Traditional therapists avoid transparency, but Kim preferred the language of "me too" as opposed to "you should." He blogged about his own shortcomings, revelations, views on relationships, and the world. He spoke a different therapeutic language —open, raw, and at times subversive — and people responded. The Angry Therapist blog, that inspired this book, has been featured in The Atlantic Monthly and on NPR.