You Don't Look Fat, You Look Crazy

You Don't Look Fat, You Look Crazy

Author: Ashley Longshore

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2017-02-07

Total Pages: 170

ISBN-13: 1682450457

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“Carpe diem, bitches.” —Ashley Longshore Pour a glass of champagne, slip off your designer heels, pull up your big girl panties and enjoy pop-artist extraordinaire Ashley Longshore’s unapologetic, raw, and literally laugh-out-loud funny guide to living an “ambitchous” life. For Ashley Longshore, the path from reluctant Southern Belle to badass artist and aspiring mogul hasn’t always been a smooth one. As a reformed Trophy-Wife-in-Training, Ashley has overcome failure, healed heartbreak, and worked damn hard, all with her signature killer attitude, to conquer the art world one glittery pop-art masterpiece at a time. You Don’t Look Fat, You Look Crazy is a window into the world of Longshore’s irreverent, glamorous, and stunningly visual pop-art-filled life, where bedazzled flowers sit next to diamonds and Valium boxes, Jesus holds a black Amex and Wonder Woman dresses in Chanel. With tongue-in-cheek advice straight from her canvas, such as “There’s No Crying At Bergdorf’s,” “Always Ask For More,” and “What Would Blue Ivy Do,” Ashley’s honesty and DGAF attitude will grab you by your Givenchy lapels and hit you across the face with the donut you promised yourself you wouldn’t eat. So be confident, grab life by the Birkins, embrace your “ambitchion,” and remember, you don’t look fat—you look crazy!


Don’t Push the Button!

Don’t Push the Button!

Author: Bill Cotter

Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.

Published: 2013-11

Total Pages: 32

ISBN-13: 1402287488

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There's only one rule in Larry's book: don't push the button. (Seriously, don't even think about it!) Even if it does look kind of nice, you must never push the button. Who knows what would happen? Okay, quick. No one is looking... push the button. Uh, oh.


How to Never Look Fat Again

How to Never Look Fat Again

Author: Charla Krupp

Publisher: Springboard Press

Published: 2014-08-21

Total Pages: 410

ISBN-13: 9781599959214

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The new style guide from the bestselling author of "How Not to Look Old" offers tips and tricks on how to look 10 pounds lighter, 10 years younger, and 10 times sexier every day, all year--without dieting. (Fashion/Grooming)


Lose Weight Like Crazy Even If You Have a Crazy Life!

Lose Weight Like Crazy Even If You Have a Crazy Life!

Author: Autumn Calabrese

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2020-08-18

Total Pages: 333

ISBN-13: 1940358531

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You can lose weight like crazy, and you can achieve anything! Autumn Calabrese shares the revolutionary step-by-step approach to lose weight that made her one of the top fitness and nutrition celebrities in the world. No cutting corners and no BS: In this book she reveals the personal struggles that shaped her approach to overcome excuses that led to this 30-day plan to succeed at weight loss, and life! Hey there! I’m Autumn Calabrese. I’m a Midwest girl, a single working mom who really had no business being in the business of health and fitness. But I found my passion in helping people achieve their weight-loss and health goals. I turned myself into a mini mega-mogul of nutrition and fitness with two of Beachbody’s most successful programs ever: 21 Day Fix and The Ultimate Portion Fix. I’ve led a crazy life and it’s still crazy—probably a lot like yours. I’ve faced tremendous hardships and disappointments that have deflated my self-confidence. But I’ve found a way to turn “failures” into “redirections” that have transformed my life. And you can do it, too! Over the past five years, I’ve helped hundreds of thousands of people finally get control of food and lose 10, 20, 30, even more than 100 pounds with my breakthrough weight-loss programs. And, now I’m going to do the same for you! Imagine enjoying your favorite CARBS, WINE AND COCKTAILS, AND EVEN CHOCOLATE CAKE and still melt fat to build the lean, fit, healthy body you’ve always wanted! Here’s my proposition: Give me just 30 days of your time, trust my process, GO ALL IN, and see what happens to your body. If you’ve ever struggled to lose weight before, I know why, and I have the solution. Lose Weight Like Crazy is NOT a DIET. There’s Zero Deprivation. It works by automatically controlling your portion sizes, eliminating those unhealthy, sugary processed foods that trigger cravings, and filling you up on a proven ratio of healthy whole foods. It’s simple. It’s backed by science. And it works. You Won't Count Calories! You won’t feel hungry or deprived! You can enjoy dessert! You can have a cocktail with your friends! You can speed up your results by adding fast, fun exercise routines that you’ll love! (free lifetime access to my 2 new workout videos included with the book!) You can maintain your new body and feel amazing—for life!


You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!

You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!

Author: Kate Kelly

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2006-04-25

Total Pages: 504

ISBN-13: 0743288947

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A revised and updated edition of the classic self-help book that has served as a lifeline to the millions of adults who have ADHD! With over a quarter million copies in print, You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! is one of the bestselling books on attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder ever written. There is a great deal of literature about children with ADHD, but what do you do if you have ADHD and aren't a child anymore? This indispensable reference—the first of its kind written for adults with ADHD by adults with ADHD—focuses on the experiences of adults, offering updated information, practical how-tos, and moral support to help readers deal with ADHD. It also explains the diagnostic process that distinguishes ADHD symptoms from normal lapses in memory, lack of concentration or impulsive behavior, offering guidance on how your reframe our view of ADHD and embrace its benefits. Here's what's new: The new ADHD medications and their effectiveness The effects of ADHD on human sexuality The differences between male and female ADHD—including falling estrogen levels and its impact on cognitive function The power of meditation ADHD coaching tricks and tips And the book still includes the tried-and-true advice about: Achieving balance by analyzing one's strengths and weaknesses Getting along in groups, at work and in intimate and family relationships—including how to decrease discord and chaos Learning the mechanics and methods for getting organized and improving memory Seeking professional help, including therapy and medication


Don't Look Back

Don't Look Back

Author: Jennifer L. Armentrout

Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers

Published: 2014-04-15

Total Pages: 384

ISBN-13: 1423187733

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Samantha is a stranger in her own life. Until the night she disappeared with her best friend, Cassie, everyone said Sam had it all???popularity, wealth, and a dream boyfriend. Sam has resurfaced, but she has no recollection of who she was or what happened to her that night. As she tries to piece together her life from before, she realizes it's one she no longer wants any part of. The old Sam took "mean girl" to a whole new level, and it's clear she and Cassie were more like best enemies. Sam is pretty sure that losing her memories is like winning the lottery. She's getting a second chance at being a better daughter, sister, and friend, and she's falling hard for Carson Ortiz, a boy who has always looked out for her???even if the old Sam treated him like trash. But Cassie is still missing, and the facts about what happened to her that night isn't just buried deep inside of Sam's memory???someone else knows, someone who wants to make sure Sam stays quiet. All Sam wants is the truth, and if she can unlock her clouded memories of that fateful night, she can finally move on. But what if not remembering is the only thing keeping Sam alive?


Too Fat to Fish

Too Fat to Fish

Author: Artie Lange

Publisher: Random House

Published: 2009-06-02

Total Pages: 354

ISBN-13: 0385526571

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Outrageous, raw, and painfully funny true stories straight from the life of the actor, comedian, and much-loved cast member of The Howard Stern Show—with a foreword by Howard Stern. When Artie Lange joined the permanent cast of The Howard Stern Show in 2001, it was possibly the greatest thing ever to happen in the Stern universe, second only to the show’s move to the wild, uncensored frontier of satellite radio. Lange provided what Stern had yet to find all in the same place: a wit quick enough to keep pace with his own, a pathetic self-image to dwarf his own, a personal history both heartbreaking and hilarious, and an ingrained sense of self-sabotage that continually keeps things interesting. A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for—sports and comedy. Tragically, Artie Lange Sr. never saw the truth in that prediction: He became a quadriplegic in an accident when Artie was eighteen and died soon after. But as with every trial in his life, from his drug addiction to his obesity to his fights with his mother, Artie mines the humor, pathos, and humanity in these events and turns them into comedy classics. True fans of the Stern Show will find Artie gold in these pages: hilarious tales that couldn’t have happened to anyone else. There are stories from his days driving a Jersey cab, working as a longshoreman in Port Newark, and navigating the dark circuit of stand-up comedy. There are outrageous episodes from the frenzied heights of his coked-up days at MADtv, surprisingly moving stories from his childhood, and an account of his recent U.S.O. tour that is equally stirring and irreverent. But also in this volume are stories Artie’s never told before, including some that he deemed too revealing for radio. Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, Too Fat to Fish is Artie Lange giving everything he’s got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.


Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat?

Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat?

Author: Lisa Scottoline

Publisher: Macmillan

Published: 2015-07-07

Total Pages: 301

ISBN-13: 1250059941

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"Lisa and Francesca are back with another collection of warm and witty stories that will strike a chord with every woman. This five book series is among the best reviewed humor books published today and has been compared to the late greats, Erma Bombeck and Nora Ephron. Delia Ephron said of the fifth book in the series, Have a Nice Guilt Trip, "Lisa and Francesca, mother and daughter, bring you the laughter of their lives once again and better than ever. You will identify with these tales of guilt and fall in love with them and fierce (grand)Mother Mary." This sixth volume will not disappoint as it hits the humorous and poignant note that fans have come to expect from the beloved mother-daughter duo"--


Whoever You Are

Whoever You Are

Author: Mem Fox

Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

Published: 2007

Total Pages: 60

ISBN-13: 9780152060664

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Despite the differences between children around the world, there are similarities that join us together, such as pain, joy, and love. Inside they are the same.


The Wreckage of My Presence

The Wreckage of My Presence

Author: Casey Wilson

Publisher: HarperCollins

Published: 2021-05-04

Total Pages: 304

ISBN-13: 0062960636

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"Magnificent." —People Magazine The instant New York Times bestseller: Laugh-out-loud, deeply insightful, and emotion-filled essays from multitalented actress, comedian, podcaster, and writer Casey Wilson. Casey Wilson has a lot on her mind and she isn’t afraid to share. In this dazzling collection, each essay skillfully constructed and brimming with emotion, she shares her thoughts on the joys and vagaries of modern-day womanhood and motherhood, introduces the not-quite-typical family that made her who she is, and persuasively argues that lowbrow pop culture is the perfect lens through which to examine human nature. Whether she’s extolling the virtues of eating in bed, processing the humiliation over her father’s late in life perm, mourning her mother's passing, or revealing her patented method for keeping the mystery alive in a marriage, Casey is witty, candid, and full of poignant and funny surprises. Humorous dives into her obsessions and areas of personal expertise—self-help, nice guys, cool girls (not her) and how to receive visitors in the bath—are matched by touching meditations on female friendship, anger, grief, motherhood, and identity. Reading The Wreckage of My Presence is like spending time with a close friend—a deeply passionate, full-tilt, joyous, excessive, compulsive, shameless, hungry-for-it-all, loyal, cheerleading friend. A friend who is ready for any big feelings that come her way—and isn’t afraid to embrace them.