The Irish mix wit and wisdom the way they do whiskey and water, and to the same intoxicating effect. Irish wit is an art form that can be sage, silly, insulting, or profound, but it's always entertaining. The Wee Book of Irish Wit & Malarkey is a pint-sized draft of potent mirth and malarkey from Oscar Wilde, Jonathan Swift, Brendan Behan, and many other wags, including 'yer man' – your everyday son of the sod – on everything from love and marriage to death and dying and everything in between.
What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 9 pints What do you call a man with a 2 inch penis? Justin What's pink and hard in the morning? The Financial Times crossword Did you hear about the consignment of Viagra pills stolen from a warehouse? Police are on the lookout for hardened criminals An aeroplane is about to crash, when a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, 'If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman.' She removes all her clothing and asks, 'Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?' A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, 'Here, iron this!' The greatest ever collection of dirty jokes guaranteed to offend and outrage the prudish. Full of hilarious gags, it's totally politically incorrect, unashamedly x-rated and downright filthy. Definitely one to keep well out of the way of the mother-in-law...
80TH BIRTHDAY EDITION - NOW WITH 10 NEW TALL TALES! THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER 'Connolly's raucous run through his life is as furious, funny and foul-mouthed as you'd expect' Sunday Times In December 2018, after fifty years of belly-laughs, energy and outrage, Billy Connolly announced his retirement from live stand-up comedy. It had been an extraordinary career. When he first started out in the late sixties, Billy played the banjo in the folk clubs of Scotland. Between songs, he would improvise a bit, telling anecdotes from the Clyde shipyard where he'd worked. In the process, he made all kinds of discoveries about what audiences found funny, from his own brilliant mimes to the power of speaking irreverently about politics or explicitly about sex. He began to understand the craft of great storytelling. Soon the songs became shorter and the monologues longer, and Billy quickly became recognised as one of the most exciting comedians of his generation. Tall Tales and Wee Stories brings together the very best of Billy's storytelling for the first time and includes his most famous routines including, The Last Supper, Jojoba Shampoo, Incontinence Pants and Shouting at Wildebeest. With an introduction and original illustrations by Billy throughout, it is an inspirational, energetic and riotously funny read, and a fitting celebration of our greatest ever comedian.
Dispelling much of what he terms the 'mythology' of the Scotch-Irish, James Leyburn provides an absorbing account of their heritage. He discusses their life in Scotland, when the essentials of their character and culture were shaped; their removal to Northern Ireland and the action of their residence in that region upon their outlook on life; and their successive migrations to America, where they settled especially in the back-country of Pennsylvania, Virginia, the Carolinas, and Georgia, and then after the Revolutionary War were in the van of pioneers to the west.
Discover a world of law-breaking leprechauns and sly faerie folk in the instant New York Times bestseller from actor and writer Thomas Lennon! Fourteen-year-old Ronan Boyle is the youngest and lowliest recruit to the secret Garda, an Irish police force that handles the misdeeds of numerous magical creatures. Ronan’s parents are in jail, but Ronan is convinced that they were framed by the wee people. So, despite his small size, poor eyesight, and social awkwardness, he’s determined to learn all he can in the Garda in order to prove his parents’ innocence. To show he’s got what it takes, he’ll have to confront a fiery leprechaun, a sinister harpy, and a whole world of monsters hidden in plain sight next to real-life Ireland. Fast paced, action packed, and completely hilarious, this is the start to an exciting new middle-grade series by actor and writer Thomas Lennon.
Over 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.
