When Maggie Lee agrees to help her Dad retrieve something from a safety deposit box, she inadvertently puts herself and someone she loves in danger. Will a botched bank robbery be the end of our favorite bumbling assassin? Don't miss the next wacky misadventure in the Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman series.
Maggie Lee is not your average hitwoman. For one thing, she's never killed anyone. For another, after hitting her head in the car accident that killed her sister, her new best friend is a talking lizard—a picky eater, obsessed with Wheel of Fortune, that only Maggie can hear. Maggie, who can barely take care of herself, is desperate to help her injured and orphaned niece get the best medical care possible, so she reluctantly accepts a mobster's lucrative job offer: major cash to kill his monstrous son-in-law. Paired with Patrick Mulligan, a charming murder mentor (who happens to moonlight as a police detective), Maggie stumbles down her new career path, contending with self-doubt, three meddling aunts, a semi-psychic friend predicting her doom, and a day job she hates. Oh, and let's not forget about Paul Kowalski, the sexy beat cop who could throw her ass in jail if he finds out what she's up to. Training has never been so complicated! And, this time, Maggie has to get the job done. Because if she doesn't . . . she's the mob's next target.
The klutzy contract killer must enlist the help of both her psychic friend, Armani, and her ever-growing collection of talking pets, as she desperately searches for not one, but two, missing relatives. At the same time she’s trying to keep the peace in her crazy family and complete an unwanted assignment from mob boss, Delveccio, which could end with her on ice. And oh yeah, she’s got a date with a certain hot manny. Maggie and friends follow a crazy and convoluted path to try to save the day, but will an unexpected enemy get the upper hand?
Imagine a high-strung, comfort loving hitwoman at a rustic spiritual retreat. Things are finally looking up for Maggie Lee. Her almost-lover Patrick is taking steps (albeit deadly ones) to insure they’ll have a future together, her niece Katie is about to be released from the hospital, her sister Marlene has stopped turning tricks and started tossing pizzas, and Maggie has a chance to land a new (legal) job. If only God would stop hounding her to apologize to her mother, Maggie would be pretty close to content with her life. When Maggie agrees to take out a new target, using a spiritual retreat as her cover story, she ends up with a spoon (long story), an odd, selectively mute roommate, and a chance to save a life. As Maggie struggles to balance all the important people in her life and deliver on the deadly contract, she begins to believe that God may be right about the act of contrition he’s demanded…but will she live long enough to do it?
Bumbling hitwoman Maggie Lee has discovered the sister she thought was dead might be alive. She’s desperate to find her, but all of her bosses are making unreasonable demands. Demands she can’t afford not to meet. Once again, Delveccio, the chocolate pudding loving mob boss, needs someone whacked. Her obnoxious boss at her day job insists she intervene on his behalf with her semi-psychic friend, Armani. And the mysterious organization with the power to put her almost-lover Patrick behind bars has saddled her with an annoying new partner and sent her on a mission that has gone to the dogs. With the clock ticking, Maggie (along with her snarky lizard, dyslexic Doberman and Southern belle cat) does her best to pull off every job without winding up in jail or dead…but is her best good enough?
Maggie Lee's dedication to her family knows no limits. Even though her life is in chaos, she'll take any chance to repair her fractured family. All she has do is: Get out of the loony bin Eliminate the killer who’s hunting her sister Make sure her family doesn’t go off the rails (yup, this one’s the toughest) Thankfully she’s got the help of an ex-lover, a conman, and a sexy sailor, along with her psychic friend, her loyal, but bickering, pets, and her favorite mob boss. If only she could rely on them to help her stop the man who wants her sister dead. With two hitmen already killed for going after him, Maggie could use all the help she can get. Maggie’s skills (and sanity) are put to the test and the stakes have never been higher.
How do you solve a murder when the victim is still alive? Maggie Lee’s murder mentor (and almost lover) Patrick Mulligan wants her to find out who poisoned him before it’s too late. Keeping the man she loves alive would be hard enough if all she had to worry about was not getting caught, but nothing’s ever that simple. In between dealing with her strung out cat, searching for Patrick’s poisoner, meeting a deadline to deliver a mysterious gift for her mobster boss and keeping a curious reporter on his toes, she finds herself entangled in the complicated (and potentially dangerous) romantic affairs of her Aunt Susan and her semi-psychic friend Armani. Hearts and lives are in peril. Can the kooky, klutzy assassin save them?
So many men….so little help. Maladroit hitwoman Maggie Lee has never been one to ask for help. But now she’s found out that her niece, Katie, will soon be discharged from the hospital - making Maggie her guardian not just in name - and her semi-psychic friend Armani Vasquez has been kidnapped. Suddenly Maggie could really use some help. While her crazy, but lovable, aunts are ready to help out with Katie, none of the men in her life are willing (or able) to lend a hand to save Armani. With both cops and bad guys telling her not to go after Armani alone, she knows the smart thing to do would be to listen to them. But Maggie’s not the type to abandon those she loves. Even with Patrick, Maggie's murder-mentor and almost-lover, and her old friend Zeke out of the picture, Maggie’s not desperate enough to bring herself to involve crime reporter Jack Stern in her quest. Armed with only Armani’s cryptic clues, and assisted by her snarky lizard, her dumb, but extremely loyal dog, and a one-eyed cat, Maggie decides to take on whoever's taken Armani. Will the lack of human help prove to be her undoing? Or will a special guy come through for her in the end?
Even a good man makes mistakes... In Maggie Lee’s topsy-turvy world, Angel Delveccio is one of the good guys, but now it seems he’s gotten himself into some trouble. Can she get him out of it? It’s not like she doesn’t have enough problems of her own. She’s struggling to pacify both the people and pets of her household -- all of whom aren’t shy about voicing their litany of complaints and demands about their new home. Stretched thin, Maggie attempts to broker familial peace while simultaneously contending with an external threat that revolves around a human skull. And let’s not forget that a certain mobster has tasked her with keeping his nephew out of hot water. Can Maggie protect Angel while keeping her family safe and together, or will someone be lost?
A USA TODAY BESTSELLER! From Edgar-Award nominee Elle Cosimano, comes Finlay Donovan Knocks 'Em Dead—the hilarious and heart-pounding follow-up to Finlay Donovan is Killing It. "Cosimano skillfully combines suspense and laughs in the manner of Janet Evanovich’s early (and best) novels, finished off with a metafictional twist."—New York Times Book Review "A funny and smart, twisty and surprising series."—Megan Miranda Finlay Donovan is—once again—struggling to finish her next novel and keep her head above water as a single mother of two. On the bright side, she has her live-in nanny and confidant Vero to rely on, and the only dead body she's dealt with lately is that of her daughter's pet goldfish. On the not-so-bright side, someone out there wants her ex-husband, Steven, out of the picture. Permanently. Whatever else Steven may be, he's a good father, but saving him will send her down a rabbit hole of hit-women disguised as soccer moms, and a little bit more involvement with the Russian mob than she'd like. Meanwhile, Vero's keeping secrets, and Detective Nick Anthony seems determined to get back into her life. He may be a hot cop, but Finlay's first priority is preventing her family from sleeping with the fishes... and if that means bending a few laws then so be it. With her next book's deadline looming and an ex-husband to keep alive, Finlay is quickly coming to the end of her rope. She can only hope there isn't a noose at the end of it...