The Almost Completely Ultimate Weegie Jokebook
The Almost Completely Ultimate Weegie Jokebook

Author: Ian Black

Publisher: Black & White Publishing

Published: 2007-10-01

Total Pages: 100

ISBN-13: 1845028570

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If there's one thing that sets Weegies apart, it's our sense of humour. Come crisis time, we not only laugh in the face of danger, but we spit on its shadow, follow it around, and occasionally set about it. Take John Smeaton, the baggage handler who clobbered the Glasgow Airport terrorists. He showed the kind of heroism, down-to-earth decency and self-deprecating humour that we all aspire to, and it turned him into an instant worldwide icon. Mere houses after he'd banjoed the terrorists the jokes started. Some of them are in here. "This is Glasgow. We'll set about ye." Got the t-shirt yet? Bin Laden's got one. And he's not coming back, at least not on John's shift. As well as paying homage to El Smeato, The Almost Completely Ultimate Weegie Jokebook is a collection of stories, jokes and anecdotes about the things that make us laugh - ourselves mostly. You are either on the Glesca bus or you're not. Welcome aboard.

The Treehouse Joke Book 2
The Treehouse Joke Book 2

Author: Andy Griffiths

Publisher: Pan Macmillan

Published: 2021-05-27

Total Pages: 256

ISBN-13: 152907312X

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Find the perfect silly joke in this collection from Andy Griffiths and Terry Denton, the creators of the internationally bestselling Treehouse series. Q: How do monkeys make toast? A: They put it under a gorilla! Q: What's grey and powdery? A: Instant elephant mix! From Bears to Birds, Penguins to Pirates, School to Space, The Treehouse Joke Book 2 is packed full of hilarious jokes and silly one-liners that will make anyone laugh their socks off. The perfect gift for any Treehouse fan, join Andy and Terry as they find the ideal joke for any occasion!

P Is for Pterodactyl
P Is for Pterodactyl

Author: Raj Haldar

Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.

Published: 2018-11-13

Total Pages: 35

ISBN-13: 1492695335

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A New York Times Bestseller! A "raucous trip through the odd corners of our alphabet." —The New York Times Let's get real—the English language is bizarre. A might be for apple, but it's also for aisle and aeons. Why does the word "gnat" start with a G but the word "knot" doesn't start with an N? It doesn't always make sense, but don't let these rule-breaking silent letters defeat you! This whimsical, funky book from Raj Haldar (aka rapper Lushlife) turns the traditional idea of an alphabet book on its head, poking fun at the most mischievous words in the English language and demonstrating how to pronounce them. Fun and informative for word nerds of all ages!

How to Be Funny
How to Be Funny

Author: Jon Macks

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2010-06-15

Total Pages: 196

ISBN-13: 1451603479

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An invaluable guide on how to "lighten up" from a distinguished pro who has provided laughs for JAY LENO, BILLY CRYSTAL, STEVE MARTIN, ROBIN WILLIAMS, BRAD GARRETT, WHOOPI GOLDBERG, AND MANY MORE. Who hasn't wished for the perfect withering comeback line, a clever tension-breaking quip, or a winning flirtatious remark? Being funny is hard work and not everyone is a natural. How to Be Funny is a witty guide that teaches readers precisely how to be funnier in everyday life. It's a must-read for anyone who has to speak in public, be engaging and funny at work or at play, or who hopes to one day go out on a date. Jon Macks, a comedy writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, the Academy Awards, the Emmy Awards, Hollywood Squares, and the nation's top comedians, politicians, and corporate leaders, knows his funny business. Here he demystifies the process of making people laugh, breaks down the basic building blocks and types of humor -- which include self-deprecation, misdirection, deadpan delivery, sarcasm, and "the reverse" -- and reveals the best approaches to use in common situations. How to Be Funny features helpful (and hilarious) tips and anecdotes from the comic legends Mack's worked with -- including Jay Leno, Arsenio Hall, Gilbert Gottfried, Billy Crystal, Rita Rudner, Dave Barry, and Carrie Fisher -- in his eleven years as one of the nation's top television writers. Whether the goal is to give a memorable public address or deliver a killer line with friends, How to Be Funny is a charming, instructive, and practical read.

The Museum of Kitschy Stitches
The Museum of Kitschy Stitches

Author: Stitchy Mcyarnpants

Publisher: Quirk Books

Published: 2006-06-01

Total Pages: 144

ISBN-13: 9781594741111

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A Fashion Tour-de-Farce! Welcome to The Museum of Kitschy Stitches, the astonishingly awful collection of the finest knitting and crocheting horrors the twentieth century has to offer. From hideous hats and gender-bending sweater sets to a set of bonus patterns that will bring the kitsch home, this gallery of notorious knits delivers it all. Remember, one person’s inspiration can become another’s desperation quicker than you can drop a stitch!

I'm Perfect, You're Doomed
I'm Perfect, You're Doomed

Author: Kyria Abrahams

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2010-11

Total Pages: 368

ISBN-13: 1416556869

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I'm Perfect, You're Doomed is the story of Kyria Abrahams's coming-of-age as a Jehovah's Witness -- a doorbell-ringing "Pioneer of the Lord." Her childhood was haunted by the knowledge that her neighbors and schoolmates were doomed to die in an imminent fiery apocalypse; that Smurfs were evil; that just about anything you could buy at a yard sale was infested by demons; and that Ouija boards -- even if they were manufactured by Parker Brothers -- were portals to hell. Never mind how popular you are when you hand out the Watchtower instead of candy at Halloween. When Abrahams turned eighteen, things got even stranger. That's when she found herself married to a man she didn't love, with adultery her only way out. "Disfellowshipped" and exiled from the only world she'd ever known, Abrahams realized that the only people who could save her were the very sinners she had prayed would be smitten by God's wrath. Raucously funny, deeply unsettling, and written with scorching wit and deep compassion, I'm Perfect, You're Doomed explores the ironic absurdity of growing up believing that nothing matters because everything's about to be destroyed.

The Seuss, the Whole Seuss and Nothing But the Seuss
The Seuss, the Whole Seuss and Nothing But the Seuss

Author: Charles Cohen

Publisher: Random House Books for Young Readers

Published: 2004-02-24

Total Pages: 402

ISBN-13: 0375822488

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Theodor Seuss Geisel, creator of Horton the Elephant, the Grinch, the Cat in the Hat, and a madcap menagerie of the best-loved children’s characters of all time, stands alone as the preeminent figure of children’s literature. But Geisel was a private man who was happier at the drawing table than he was across from any reporter or would-be biographer. Under the thoughtful scrutiny of Charles D. Cohen, Geisel’s lesser known works yield valuable insights into the imaginative and creative processes of one of the 20th century’s most original thinkers.

I Even Funnier
I Even Funnier

Author: James Patterson

Publisher: jimmy patterson

Published: 2013-12-09

Total Pages: 281

ISBN-13: 0316206962

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In James Patterson's follow-up to I Funny, middle schooler Jamie Grimm is ready for the national comedy semi-finals. . . but when his family and friends need his help, will he have to put his dreams on hold? In this follow up to the #1 New York Times bestseller I Funny, middle schooler Jamie Grimm has big dreams of being the best stand-up comic in the world-and he won't let the fact that he's wheelchair-bound stand in his way. After winning the New York state finals in the Planet's Funniest Kid Comic Contest, Jamie's off to Boston to compete in the national semi-finals. But when one of his best buddies runs into trouble at school and a sudden family health scare rears its head, Jamie has to put his comedic ambitions on hold and stand by the people he cares about. Can Jamie pass up the big competition for the sake of his friends and family?