poems i wrote not to be run over by a garbage truck, not to cut off my toes with a pair of scissors, not to die of electrocution while microwaving my phone and most of all not to sing a love song in a hailstorm.
Cheaper than therapy is the true story of a naive, sheltered young man from the northern suburbs of Detroit. The young man bobs and weaves his way through high school, and decides to go to college with all the forthought that goes into buying a candy bar at Walmart. Follow the author through those heady days of high school, including the first car, the first job, and a round or two with old John Barleycorn. His spur of the moment decision to go to college, finds him getting in over his head in the shark infested waters of academia, with some humorous misadventures along the way. During his college years he lands a job at a summer camp that changes his life forever. Follow him on a journey that takes him back to that very same camp, to have closure for an accident on a fateful day in July 1981. Cheaper than therapy is a labor of love. It is the author's baby, which took 25 years to deliver.
Running: Cheaper than Therapy is a witty and expertly compiled compendium of running wisdom and humour. From fantastic running quotes ('How do you know if someone ran a marathon? Don't worry, they'll tell you.' Jimmy Fallon) and hilarious spectator signs ('Worst parade ever!') to witty potted profiles of different types of runners (charity muggers, gadget gurus and inexplicably good old dears) and PB-busting training tips, Running: Cheaper than Therapy is designed to be the perfect gift for the runner, jogger or triathlete in your life. Written by a Telegraph and Guardian journalist and self-confessed running nut, this smartly packaged and brilliantly knowing miscellany details entertaining, real-life runners' stories (being overtaken by a kid/OAP or getting lost while training) and takes a humorous look at the mistakes runners make (wearing a brand new pair of trainers for half marathon or getting so pumped by your morning run you have arguments with everyone at work).
Running: So Much More Than Just Exercise... 2008 was the worst year of Ouida Brown's life. Her beloved mother, the heart of her life died of breast cancer. Ouida found herself in a dark place-lost, depressed, and angry. She didn't know who she was anymore...what had happened to her optimism, her energy, her bubbly personality? In her unhappiness, she turned to comfort food, abandoned her healthy eating habits, and gained weight. Her journey back to wholeness came when a trusted friend gently confronted her and told her she needed help. Ouida's path to healing included running along the Penn's Landing Waterfront. As she ran, she realized that running was a discipline and a therapy all its own-yes, it was about fitness and weight loss, but it was so much more than that. Through running, Ouida discovered another way to talk to God, a way to find herself, and the amazing support of a community that shared her passion. Running Is Cheaper Than Therapy is an inspiring story not only of a comeback from life's worst emotional traumas, but also of a comeback from athletic injury, as Ouida confronts and overcomes sports injuries to triumph as a marathon runner.
In the realm of amusing, deadpan greetings cards, Cath Tate is the original and best. In her thirty-year career she has created thousands of witty, original and often subversive cards, featuring grim-faced old ladies, ludicrously dressed 1920s gentlemen and bizarre-looking children, paired with text that perfectly captures her highly individual and devastatingly funny view on the world. This hilarious book – a perfect gift for a beloved friend – brings together the best of Cath's work on friendship. Whimsical, scurrilous and – very occasionally – tender, it is packed with insights into today's modern friendships, from belligerent bookclubs to over-enthusiastic drama queens to ridiculous hen parties. After all, as Cath says, 'A friend is someone who likes you even though they know you.'
Reviled by her snobby family but adored by her friends, unemployed etiquette expert Melissa Romney-Jones reinvents herself as Honey, and goes into business as a matchmaker for inept bachelors.
From the creator of the Bestseller Calm the F*ck Down Cheaper than Therapy is the Coloring Journal you need to color and journal the things you can't say out loud! With 32 Full Page Illustrations 31 Illustrated Journal Pages 31 Simple college rule lined journal pages A way to take out your creativity and frustration without breaking the law and more... What people are saying: "You have really outdone yourself this time!! I love every single thing about this book!...I feel like you went in my mind and took out my thoughts and put them in a book. The drawings are amazing and this book is just the ultimate best!" - Lina "I LOVE IT, LOVE IT, FREEEEAAAAKKKKING love it!!!... It is just perfect. Or as close as one can get. Have some chocolate and wine and chill out. JOB WELL DONE" - Bonnie "Awesome! Just abso-freakin-lutely awesome!!" - Bernadine "Love it! So many pages I saw that I want to grab and start coloring right now! LOL!" - Brandy Z "The perfect mix of intricate and open spaces coloring!" - Anita "LOVE IT!!!!!!!! It is not so busy for the person that does simple colors, and busy enough to keep the attention of the person, like me, who likes the fun detailed stuff. I like that there are coloring options on some of he journal pages, and the images are great! You got your Snark on, girl." - Anna From the back cover: "Grab your pens and pencils and pull up that damn couch, because it's time to get your snark on! When the shit show of life is making you crazy and everyone has lost their minds, let Cheaper than Therapy ease your stress with its insanely out of line pages. With over 30 shockingly subversive illustrations, plus plenty of colorable journaling pages, you're sure to get your sanity back in no time! Each single-sided coloring page ranges from moderate to detailed in complexity. Pages include sayings like "Good morning, I see the assassins have failed", "My happy place is your happy place burning to the ground", and "Are you fucking kidding me?!", "Ew. People" and more. Complete with added journal pages; now you can color, write, doodle, make lists for your world domination plan or use those badass mofo's as kindling for the bridges you'll burn. Color and journal the things you can't say and that your therapist shouldn't hear. It's just what the doctor ordered." For updates and downloads visit www.sashaohara.com CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE
The cupboards are overflowing, the linen closet holds towels and tools, and your once tidy family room might as well come with a ringmaster. But that's called living, right? Wrong! Marni Jameson is here to prove that you can turn a hectic home into a haven--and do so without being voted off the island. With chapters such as "Kids are Great--They Only Dismantle Your Home One Piece at a Time," you'll laugh as you learn whether to opt for solids or patterns; what constitutes "indestructible flooring"; how to organize your house from top to bottom; and how to decorate so home appeal goes up and blood pressure goes down. House of Havoc is that indispensable guide for making the most of the house you have without driving everyone around you nuts.
... no appointment necessary! Chocoholics unite! You've always known the cure for any serious ailment was a sweet chocolate treat, but now there is a cookbook to support your theory! Just turn to any page of this fun-filled book for some therapeutic pleasure. Recipes for beverages, breads, muffins, cookies, cakes and candies prove that chocolate is cheaper than therapy! Some favorite prescriptions are: Hot Cocoa Mochas, Cherry Cranberry Chocolate Chip Bread, Chocolate Mint Cheesecake, White Chocolate Macadamia Cookies and Rocky Road Candies. Book size: 5 1/4" x 8 1/4", 128 pages with brown plastic coil binding.
Denise Van Outen, original 90s 'ladette', West End star and primetime TV favourite, reveals for the first time the true story of grit and graft beneath the famous Essex sparkle. In this refreshingly candid memoir, Denise speaks openly and sensitively about her rollercoaster career, her struggles in a past high-profile relationship and the betrayal she suffered at the hands of those once closest to her, with the hope that in doing so, she can help empower others to avoid and overcome any similar difficulties they may face. Denise shot to fame on The Big Breakfast in her early twenties. After a decade grafting through theatre jobs and children's TV shows, she was finally living the dream. However her life soon turned into a nightmare off-screen and behind the headlines as her heart was broken in a very public relationship, whilst her every move was printed in the tabloids thanks to her phone being tapped. After receiving a panning by the critics for her late night TV show aimed at the post-pub crowd, she then auditioned for and accepted an offer to play Roxie Hart in Chicago, which turned out to be a life-changing experience. The role took her to Broadway, where she caught the eye of one Andrew Lloyd Webber, eventually landing a judging role on Any Dream Will Do, which saw her rise back to primetime and the career that she loves, where she has stayed and flourished. Now, in her first memoir, Denise tells her story with disarming candour, unafraid to reveal vulnerabilities beneath the cheerful exterior. Tackling difficult subjects of corrosive self-doubt, betrayal, invasions of privacy and professional struggles, interjected with the familiar humour that we all know and love, A Bit of Me is personal, at times raw, often mischievous and always compelling. Denise has lived the life, learned the lessons, and Basildon to Broadway and back is a hell of a journey.