“Amy Webb found her true love after a search that's both charmingly romantic and relentlessly data-driven. Anyone who uses online dating sites must read her funny, fascinating book.”—Gretchen Rubin, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Happiness Project After yet another disastrous date, Amy Webb was preparing to cancel her JDate membership when epiphany struck: her standards weren’t too high, she just wasn’t approaching the process the right way. Using her gift for data strategy, she found which keywords were digital-man magnets, analyzed photos, and then adjusted her (female) profile to make the most of that intel. Then began the deluge—dozens of men who actually met her own stringent requirements wanted to meet her. Among them: her future husband, now the father of her child.
The #1 New York Times Bestseller “An engaging look at the often head-scratching, frequently infuriating mating behaviors that shape our love lives.” —Refinery 29 A hilarious, thoughtful, and in-depth exploration of the pleasures and perils of modern romance from Aziz Ansari, the star of Master of None and one of this generation’s sharpest comedic voices At some point, every one of us embarks on a journey to find love. We meet people, date, get into and out of relationships, all with the hope of finding someone with whom we share a deep connection. This seems standard now, but it’s wildly different from what people did even just decades ago. Single people today have more romantic options than at any point in human history. With technology, our abilities to connect with and sort through these options are staggering. So why are so many people frustrated? Some of our problems are unique to our time. “Why did this guy just text me an emoji of a pizza?” “Should I go out with this girl even though she listed Combos as one of her favorite snack foods? Combos?!” “My girlfriend just got a message from some dude named Nathan. Who’s Nathan? Did he just send her a photo of his penis? Should I check just to be sure?” But the transformation of our romantic lives can’t be explained by technology alone. In a short period of time, the whole culture of finding love has changed dramatically. A few decades ago, people would find a decent person who lived in their neighborhood. Their families would meet and, after deciding neither party seemed like a murderer, they would get married and soon have a kid, all by the time they were twenty-four. Today, people marry later than ever and spend years of their lives on a quest to find the perfect person, a soul mate. For years, Aziz Ansari has been aiming his comic insight at modern romance, but for Modern Romance, the book, he decided he needed to take things to another level. He teamed up with NYU sociologist Eric Klinenberg and designed a massive research project, including hundreds of interviews and focus groups conducted everywhere from Tokyo to Buenos Aires to Wichita. They analyzed behavioral data and surveys and created their own online research forum on Reddit, which drew thousands of messages. They enlisted the world’s leading social scientists, including Andrew Cherlin, Eli Finkel, Helen Fisher, Sheena Iyengar, Barry Schwartz, Sherry Turkle, and Robb Willer. The result is unlike any social science or humor book we’ve seen before. In Modern Romance, Ansari combines his irreverent humor with cutting-edge social science to give us an unforgettable tour of our new romantic world.
A wise, lyrical memoir about the power of literature to help us read our own lives—and see clearly the people we love most. “Transcendent.”—The Washington Post • “You’d be hard put to find a more moving appreciation of Woolf’s work.”—The Wall Street Journal NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY TOWN & COUNTRY Katharine Smyth was a student at Oxford when she first read Virginia Woolf’s modernist masterpiece To the Lighthouse in the comfort of an English sitting room, and in the companionable silence she shared with her father. After his death—a calamity that claimed her favorite person—she returned to that beloved novel as a way of wrestling with his memory and understanding her own grief. Smyth’s story moves between the New England of her childhood and Woolf’s Cornish shores and Bloomsbury squares, exploring universal questions about family, loss, and homecoming. Through her inventive, highly personal reading of To the Lighthouse, and her artful adaptation of its groundbreaking structure, Smyth guides us toward a new vision of Woolf’s most demanding and rewarding novel—and crafts an elegant reminder of literature’s ability to clarify and console. Braiding memoir, literary criticism, and biography, All the Lives We Ever Lived is a wholly original debut: a love letter from a daughter to her father, and from a reader to her most cherished author. Praise for All the Lives We Ever Lived “This searching memoir pays homage to To the Lighthouse, while recounting the author’s fraught relationship with her beloved father, a vibrant figure afflicted with alcoholism and cancer. . . . Smyth’s writing is evocative and incisive.”—The New Yorker “Like H Is for Hawk, Smyth’s book is a memoir that’s not quite a memoir, using Woolf, and her obsession with Woolf, as a springboard to tell the story of her father’s vivid life and sad demise due to alcoholism and cancer. . . . An experiment in twenty-first century introspection that feels rooted in a modernist tradition and bracingly fresh.”—Vogue “Deeply moving – part memoir, part literary criticism, part outpouring of longing and grief… This is a beautiful book about the wildness of mortal life, and the tenuous consolations of art.”—The Times Literary Supplement “Blending analysis of a deeply literary novel with a personal story... gently entwining observations from Woolf's classic with her own layered experience. Smyth tells us of her love for her father, his profound alcoholism and the unpredictable course of the cancer that ultimately claimed his life.”—Time
The City of Dating, A Memoir, is a hilariously unique look into the truths of New York City dating through Stevie Bowen's honest and daringly real thank you letters to past dates? or lack thereof. Facing the new millennial horrors of online dating, ghosting, and finance bros, Stevie shares her personal struggles with navigating relationships, hollow crushes, and one-night-stands in the excitingly daunting big city. In her search for self-love, she finds friendship at the core of her story. She makes an unwavering group of best friends who guide her through the complicated life of dating. In this unapologetic personal memoir, she bares hard lessons of love, desires, and self-discovery. A brilliant nod to strong, independent women everywhere!You will constantly relate to the intimate and bittersweet memories of heartbreak and happiness. Stevie's thank you letters will inspire you to put yourself out there once again and embrace the soulmates you find along the way, your best friends!
Conquering the dating market—from an economist’s point of view After more than twenty years, economist Paul Oyer found himself back on the dating scene—but what a difference a few years made. Dating was now dominated by sites like Match.com, eHarmony, and OkCupid. But Oyer had a secret weapon: economics. It turns out that dating sites are no different than the markets Oyer had spent a lifetime studying. Monster.com, eBay, and other sites where individuals come together to find a match gave Oyer startling insight into the modern dating scene. The arcane language of economics—search, signaling, adverse selection, cheap talk, statistical discrimination, thick markets, and network externalities—provides a useful guide to finding a mate. Using the ideas that are central to how markets and economics and dating work, Oyer shows how you can apply these ideas to take advantage of the economics in everyday life, all around you, all the time. For all online daters—and for anyone else swimming in the vast sea of the information economy—this book uses Oyer’s own experiences, and those of millions of others, to help you navigate the key economic concepts that drive the modern age.
Internet Dating deals primarily with the experiences of UK and Australian daters, examining their online accounts to see what kinds of narratives, norms, emotions and ‘chemistry’ shape their dating. Has the emergence and growth of internet dating changed the dating landscape for the better? Most commentators, popular and academic, ask whether online dating is more efficient for individuals than offline dating. We prefer a socio-political perspective. In particular, the book illustrates the extent to which internet dating can advance gender and sexual equality. Drawing on the voices of internet daters themselves, we show that internet dating reveals how social change often arises in the unassuming, everyday and familiar. We also pay attention to often ignored older daters and include consideration of daters in Africa, Scandinavia, South America, Asia and the Middle East. Throughout, we explore the pitfalls and pleasures of men and women daters navigating unconventional directions towards more equitable social relations.
In Love at First Site, dating coach Erika Ettin has taken her expertise—previously only available to her clients—and laid it out in an easy-to-use and exciting guide to the world of online dating. Erika shows her readers how to increase their odds for connections by marketing themselves well. Her background in economics helps her use the numbers game in her favor. It’s a simple equation: more profile views equal more dates, more dates equal a better chance at finding your match. With her tips and tricks, Erika can show you exactly how to increase your online dating odds. Erika’s advice includes pointers for choosing your best profile picture, writing a winning profile, crafting emails that catch someone’s attention, and planning the first date. Erika’s knowledge is rooted in her highly successful coaching business as well as her own experience with online dating. Questions from Erika’s clients will save you the time of wondering how to approach strange situations—they’re all in here! And tales of dating adventures from Erika herself will leave you both encouraged and entertained. Erika holds a BA in economics from Cornell University and an MBA from Georgetown University. Since launching her online dating consulting business, A Little Nudge, Erika has helped hundreds of clients in the United States and abroad find happiness. She currently lives in Washington, D.C.
It is possible to find true love through dating. In True Love Dates, Debra Fileta encourages singles not to "kiss dating goodbye" but instead to experience a season of dating as a way to find real love. Through powerful, real-life stories and Fileta's personal journey, this book offers profound insights from the expertise of a professional counselor. Christians are looking for answers to finding true love. They are disillusioned with the church that has provided little practical application in the area of love and relationships. They're bombarded by Christian books that shun dating, idolize courting, fixate on spirituality, and in the end, offer little real relationship help. True Love Dates provides honest help for dating by providing a guide into vital relationship essentials. Debra is a professional Christian counselor who reaches millions with her popular blog, Truelovedates.com, and her book offers sound advice grounded in Christian spirituality. She delivers insight, direction, and counsel when it comes to entering the world of dating and learning to do it right the first time around. Drawing on the stories and struggles of hundreds of young men and women who have pursued the search for true love, Fileta helps readers bypass unnecessary pain while focusing on the things that really matter in the world of dating.
Does the thought of joining a dating site invoke feelings of fear and anxiety—or, worse, insecurity or unworthiness? If so, then The Grown Woman’s Guide to Online Dating is the book for you. With practical advice about how these sites work, what to expect, and when to join and quit, along with proven tips for making the most of them, The Grown Woman’s Guide equips readers with all they need to take the plunge. Four years after an unexpected divorce, bestselling writer and funny lady Margot Starbuck found herself venturing into the unknown waters of online dating. What she discovered surprised her—and changed her. With her signature sharp wit and a solid biblical foundation, Margot shares what she learned, including how to: determine which sites are best and what to expect; write a first message that is most likely to get a response; avoid common pitfalls in creating your profile; and live out the truth that you are God’s beloved. So dive into embracing your true value and drawing closer to God even in the midst of fear and questions. Because whatever your endgame might be, richness awaits. Margot promises, “You got this, girl!” “Gives you concrete steps for dating well, from the beginning to the end, all while reminding you just how loved you already are.” —Chrystal Evans Hurst, bestselling author and speaker “With humor, wisdom, and practical answers, Margot’s heart and voice shine through this book, and I can’t wait to send it to my single friends!” —Bianca Juarez Olthoff, pastor, speaker, and author of the bestselling How to Have Your Life Not Suck
The Psychology of Modern Dating: Websites, Apps, and Relationships is a resource guide outlining the major observations of trends currently applicable to online dating via dating sites and apps. This text outlines the theoretical foundation and evidentiary support for the motivations of online dating use as well as the shift witnessed within a new form of romantic relationship development created by online dating platforms. This book will also examine the significance of self theory in the creation of online profiles as well as analyze the influence of factors, including age, gender, sexual orientation and race and the roles they plan in online dating interactions. Future thoughts and directions for investigation will be offered as consideration for ongoing study.
