Merry Fucking Christmas

Merry Fucking Christmas

Author: Joe Movick

Publisher:

Published: 2020-11-19

Total Pages: 130

ISBN-13: 9781736098004

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Christmas is a time of family, stress, love, wanting, resentment, and occasional violence.It's tradition.Frozen turkeys, drunk in-laws, gifts that bite, Santa breaking and entering, death, infidelity?Six short comedies to help you wind down during the holidays.


Denis Leary's Merry F#%$in' Christmas

Denis Leary's Merry F#%$in' Christmas

Author: Denis Leary

Publisher: Running Press Adult

Published: 2012-10-30

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9780762447626

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For everyone who loves the holidays - and those of us who can't wait until they're over - Denis Leary has a special gift this season: Merry F***in' Christmas. This adult parody of a children's book, in the vein of Go The Fuck To Sleep, takes aim at bad presents, drunk Santas, boring relatives, ugly sweaters, greedy kids and all the other things that make December such a pain in the ass. Just like he did in The Ref - the cult classic Christmas film that skewers dysfunctional families - Denis will have you laughing out loud about just how unhappy the holidays can be.


Merry F*cking Christmas

Merry F*cking Christmas

Author: Diane Cormack

Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform

Published: 2016-11-08

Total Pages: 62

ISBN-13: 9781539996613

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Does the holiday season drive you NUTS? Do you know somebody who'd put Scrooge to shame with their festive grumblings?Merry F*cking Christmas is the perfect antidote to Christmas cheer and festive overload. It's the ideal gift for friends who hate Christmas or year-round grumps!Relax and unwind with:- 20 single-sided coloring pages- 2 mini test images of each coloring page to experiment on- snarky phrases to help you vent your frustration ('how about I KICK you under the mistletoe?', "Silent night... I bloody wish')- a range of beautiful designs, flowers, doodles, and abstract patterns- perfect gift for grumpy friends or secret santaNot suitable for children or the easily offended.


Twelve Nights at Rotter House

Twelve Nights at Rotter House

Author: J.W. Ocker

Publisher: Turner Publishing Company

Published: 2019-10-29

Total Pages: 190

ISBN-13: 1684423708

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Felix Allsey is a travel writer with a keen eye for the paranormal, and he’s carved out a unique, if only slightly lucrative, niche for himself in nonfiction; he writes travelogues of the country’s most haunted places, after haunting them himself. When he convinces the owner of the infamous Rotterdam Mansion to let him stay on the premises for 13 nights, he believes he’s finally found the location that will bring him a bestseller. As with his other gigs, he sets rules for himself: no leaving the house for any reason, refrain from outside contact, and sleep during the day. When Thomas Ruth, Felix's oldest friend and fellow horror film obsessive, joins him on the project, the two dance around a recent and unspeakably painful rough-patch in their friendship, but eventually fall into their old rhythms of dark humor and movie trivia. That’s when things start going wrong: screams from upstairs, figures in the thresholds, and more than what should be in any basement. Felix realizes the book he’s writing, and his very state of mind, is tilting from nonfiction into all out horror, and the shocking climax answers a question that’s been staring these men in the face all along: In Rotter House, who’s haunting who?


The Elf on the Shelf

The Elf on the Shelf

Author: Carol V. Aebersold

Publisher:

Published: 2012-02-01

Total Pages: 32

ISBN-13: 9780984365173

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The Elf on the Shelf: A Christmas Tradition is an activity the entire family will enjoy. Based on the tradition Carol Aebersold began with her family in the 1970s, this cleverly rhymed children's book explains that Santa knows who is naughty and/or nice because he sends a scout elf to every home. During the holiday season, the elf watches children by day and reports to Santa each night. When children awake, the elf has returned from the North Pole and can be found hiding in a different location. This activity allows The Elf on the Shelf to become a delightful hide-and-seek game.


People I Want to Punch in the Throat

People I Want to Punch in the Throat

Author: Jen Mann

Publisher: Ballantine Books

Published: 2014-09-09

Total Pages: 226

ISBN-13: 0345549988

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NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear


Festive As Fuck: a Hilarious Christmas Swear Word Coloring Book

Festive As Fuck: a Hilarious Christmas Swear Word Coloring Book

Author: Cindy Booth

Publisher:

Published: 2016-11-10

Total Pages: 58

ISBN-13: 9781539989523

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Celebrate the holiday season with this hilarious Christmas swear word coloring book for adults, filled with cursing Santas, mean reindeer, sarcastic snowmen, and other holiday-themed illustrations dripping with inappropriate language. With illustrations ranging from simple to complex, this adult coloring book will provide hours of fun and relaxation to help you get through the Christmas season!


Mother California

Mother California

Author: Kenneth E. Hartman

Publisher: Atlas and Company

Published: 2010-09-27

Total Pages: 206

ISBN-13: 1934633941

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"A magnificent inquiry into the human condition."—Publishers Weekly, starred review Thirty years ago, when Kenneth Hartman was nineteen, he murdered a homeless man in a Los Angeles park. Sentenced to life without parole, Hartman gradually evolved into a devoted husband, father, and prison reform activist. Mother California offers definite proof that there is no such thing as a life beyond redemption.


Happy F*cking Holidays

Happy F*cking Holidays

Author: Sasha O'hara

Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform

Published: 2016-11

Total Pages: 64

ISBN-13: 9781539679370

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From the creator of the Best Seller Calm the Fck Down 'Tis the season to get snarky! It's that time again. Time to put on your elastic waistband pants, spike your eggnog, and brace yourself for the crazy "Holidaze". Why let the dark days of winter get you down when you can enjoy your own cynical and sassy Christmas coloring adventure? This holiday season, color the things you can't say and still keep Peace on Earth. Happy fucking Holidays is an irreverent and subversive take on Christmas and is the perfect way to unwind and relax for Christmas. It's an ideal gift, for anyone who is stressed, and for those with a subversive and irreverent sense of humor. Enjoy these humorous illustrations that let you fill your holiday season with inappropriate and unapologetic joy. Includes 26 single-sided adult coloring pages and 2 color test pages. Illustrations range from Simple to complex to color, and most are moderate in detail. Irreverent Images include: Santa, ornaments, a cat, a snowman, an Elf, candy canes, wreaths, reindeer, and many more... Sassy sayings include: It's beginning to feel a lot like fuck this, I peed in your eggnog, sweet and twisted, naughty, kiss my ass, fat judgmental bastard, sleigh me, and many more humorous and subversive sayings.... For more information, for free coloring page downloads, contests and more, visit www.sashaohara.com CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE. NOT INTENDED FOR CHILDREN.


Subversive Cross Stitch

Subversive Cross Stitch

Author: Julie Jackson

Publisher: powerHouse Books

Published: 2015-02-17

Total Pages: 121

ISBN-13: 1576877558

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Julie Jackson is back and more subversive than ever! This new anniversary edition of her classicSubversive Cross Stitchcelebrates more than 10 years of delightfully snarky, in-your-face cross stitch with 50 full-color patterns including17 brand-new designs, such as "Don't Be Such A Baby" and "Cheer Up, Loser." Subversive Cross Stitch: 50 F*cking Clever Designs For Your Sassy Sideinvites stitchers of all levels to fully express their bad-ass crafty selves, whether they need to release their inner curmudgeon or let fly with a witty insult. With alphabet charts and easy-to-follow instructions for every design,Subversive Cross Stitch: 50 F*cking Clever Designs For Your Sassy Sideincludes everything you need to get your craft on from the original instigator of subversive stitching.