Dangerous Love
Dangerous Love

Author: Chad Ford

Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers

Published: 2020-06-23

Total Pages: 263

ISBN-13: 1523089784

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

“Chad Ford reminds us that humanity lies within all of us, and although conflict is everywhere in today's world, we have the tools we need to overcome obstacles and to thrive. This is a fantastic, timely book that I highly recommend." —Steve Kerr, Head Coach, Golden State Warriors Knowing how to transform conflict is critical in both our personal and professional lives. Yet, by and large, we are terrible at it. The reason, says longtime mediator Chad Ford, is fear. When conflict comes, our instincts are to run or fight. To transform conflict, Ford says we need to turn toward the people we are in conflict with, put down our physical and emotional weapons, and really love them with the kind of love that leads us to treat others as fellow human beings, not as objects in our way. We have to open ourselves up with no guarantee that anyone on the other side will do the same. While this can feel even more dangerous than conflict itself, it allows us to see the humanity of others so clearly that their needs and desires matter to us as much as our own. Ford shows dangerous love in action through examples ranging from his work in the Middle East to a deeply moving story about reconciling with his father. He explains why we disconnect from people at the very time we need to be most connected and the predictable patterns of justification and escalation that ensue. Most importantly, he gives us a path to practice dangerous love in the conflicts that matter most to us.

Wired for Love
Wired for Love

Author: Stan Tatkin

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2024-06-01

Total Pages: 332

ISBN-13: 1648482988

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.

Dating Radar
Dating Radar

Author: Bill Eddy

Publisher: Unhooked Books

Published: 2017-08-22

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781936268122

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Why do so many of us commit to the wrong person? Most believe that attraction and compatibility are the keys to relationship success when, in reality, these are red flags in 15-20% of the population. When it comes to love, the brain is irrational and shortsighted. We make decisions based on incomplete information, biased understanding, and strong emotion. Love truly is blind. That's why you need dating radar, it gives you a way to detect hazards you might otherwise miss by recognizing: 1. Warning signs of certain personalities that can spell love relationship danger 2. Ways that they can jam your radar (deceive you) 3. Where your own blind spots might be Attorney, mediator, and social worker Bill Eddy and relationship expert Megan Hunter use their expertise in high-conflict personalities, complicated relationships and divorce to equip readers to see through the blinding spark of new love and spot potential toxic relationships before it is too late! If hindsight is 20/20, dating radar is x-ray vision. Bill Eddy is an award-winning author and president of High Conflict Institute.Megan Hunter is a publisher, author, speaker and the founder of Unhooked Media.

Learning to Love
Learning to Love

Author: Don Rosenthal

Publisher: Union Square + ORM

Published: 2009-09-18

Total Pages: 221

ISBN-13: 1402772750

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Couples—discover how to navigate conflict and foster a more loving, trusting, satisfying relationship with this guide by two seasoned experts. What holds a couple together? Why are we afraid of intimacy? How can we keep our hearts open to one another in the midst of hurt and resentment? In this provocative book, Don and Martha Rosenthal, acclaimed workshop leaders and founders of The Heartwork Center, help couples move through conflict and difficulty toward the love and trust essential to satisfying relationships. Based on nearly two decades of highly successful couples workshops, as well as the Rosenthals’ own 35 years as committed partners, this book is a rare combination of timeless wisdom and practical guidance. Written in clear, accessible language, it offers workable strategies for listening to your partner with an open heart; asking for change; giving and receiving; dealing with anger; and releasing one’s own feelings of guilt, fear, and defensiveness. Yet it does all this with a spiritual depth that is both rare and compelling. By embracing as material the full range of our feelings, the messiness of our imperfections, it speaks compassionately to the human condition we all share. Learning to Love is a spiritual guide to relationship that truly works. Its unique strength lies in showing partners how to use their inevitable conflicts as the means to a deeper intimacy. And its fruits, to those willing to cultivate them, are the tools and resources that can make the sharing of unconditional love a daily reality. Praise for Learning to Love “[A] deeply insightful and inspiring guide to love. Highly recommended.” —Marianne Williamson

Love Cycles, Fear Cycles
Love Cycles, Fear Cycles

Author: David Woodsfellow

Publisher: SelectBooks, Inc.

Published: 2018-03-27

Total Pages: 187

ISBN-13: 1590794788

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Love Cycles, Fear Cycles teaches readers the most important idea in all of couples therapy. This idea gives readers a new understanding of what’s been going wrong in their marriage – and a new way to make things right. The key idea is changing a couple’s negative cycle back into their positive cycle. Most relationships start in a positive cycle, where both people feel wonderful and respond lovingly. There are four words that describe each couple’s positive cycle – one for each person’s good feeling, and one for each person’s loving response. However, as challenges arise, people instinctively respond with some type of fight or flight. Over time, these responses spiral together into a negative cycle where each person feels bad and responds defensively. There are four words for each couple’s negative cycle – one for each person’s worst feeling, and one for each person’s defensive reaction. Many couples get trapped in their negative cycle and their relationship spirals deeper into hurt and loneliness. To have a good marriage, a couple needs to find a way out of their negative cycle and back into their positive cycle. Love Cycles, Fear Cycles teaches readers how to do that. From his decades as a couples therapist, Dr. Woodsfellow has distilled this one most-essential component of all successful marriage counseling. He now presents this to the general public in a way that is easy to understand and easy to use.

Conflict and Decision Making in Close Relationships
Conflict and Decision Making in Close Relationships

Author: Erich Kirchler

Publisher: Psychology Press

Published: 2013-01-11

Total Pages: 274

ISBN-13: 1135816956

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Love and money are important aspects of the everyday lives of couples. This book focuses on the daily routines of disagreement, conflict and joint decisions on these, and other issues such as work, leisure and children, create in the household. Central to the authors' research is a unique diary study of forty couples, who kept a daily record of their joint decisions over the course of a year. The diaries show how challenging, varied and complex the conflicts and decision making of normal everyday life can be and reveal that goals frequently change during the decision-making process with the result that the final outcome often achieves a goal distinct from the original intention. Furthermore, the dynamics of decision making differ according to the problem at stake, the decision-making history of the couple, and the quality of the partnership. The results of the diary study are discussed within the overall context of current research in the field as a whole, including discussion of joint decision-making case studies, close relationships, decision-making research in general and special research methods. Numerous results of psychological, sociological, economic and consumer behaviour studies are summarised and integrated into a model of household decision-making. This book will be primarily of interest to students and researchers in social psychology and economic psychology, but its interdisciplinary and applied nature will also make it of relevance to professionals working in the fields of family therapy and consumer behaviour.

Anxious in Love
Anxious in Love

Author: Carolyn Daitch

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2012-12-01

Total Pages: 142

ISBN-13: 1608822338

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

Healthy relationships require trust, intimacy, effective communication, and understanding. However, if you suffer from chronic anxiety you may have trouble dealing with everyday conflicts and tensions that can arise in relationships. No matter how committed you are, anxiety can leave you feeling distanced from your partner. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to overcome the anxiety-fueled reactions that keep you from achieving true closeness in your relationship. Written by two experts on anxiety disorders, Anxious in Love offers easy-to-use techniques for calming anxieties and strengthening communication in your relationship. With this book, you will learn to stay centered when faced with conflict, understand your partner’s perspective, and become more independent. By changing the way you react to triggers and stress, you will be able to focus on enjoying time with the one you love, without anxiety getting in the way.

Vertical Marriage
Vertical Marriage

Author: Dave Wilson

Publisher: Zondervan

Published: 2019-01-29

Total Pages: 241

ISBN-13: 0310352177

DOWNLOAD EBOOK

For anyone who is married, preparing for marriage, or desperate to save a relationship teetering on the brink of divorce, marriage coaches Dave and Ann Wilson offer hope and strategies gleaned from personal experience and Scripture that really work. Vertical Marriage will give you the insight, applications, and inspiration to transform your marriage into everything you hoped it would be. Honest to the core and laugh-out-loud funny, Dave and Ann Wilson share the one secret that brought them from the brink of divorce to a healthy and vibrant relationship. If you had asked Dave how their marriage was doing on the night of their tenth wedding anniversary, Dave would have rated it a 9.8 out of 10, and he would have even guaranteed that Ann would say the same. But instead of giving him a celebratory kiss, Ann whispered, "I've lost my feelings for you." Divorce seemed inevitable for the Wilsons, but starting that night, God began to reveal to Dave and Ann the most overlooked secret of getting the marriage we are looking for: a horizontal marriage relationship just doesn't work until your vertical relationship with Christ is first. As founders of a multi-campus church and marriage coaches with 30 years of experience, Dave and Ann share the hard-earned but easy-to-apply biblical principles that ensure a strong marriage. Written in a highly relatable dialogue between both husband and wife, Vertical Marriage will guide you toward building a vibrant relationship at every level, giving you the tools you need to embrace: Effective communication Fair conflict True romance A deeper connection Through their unique perspectives, Dave and Ann share an intimate, sometimes hilarious, and at times deeply poignant narrative of one couple's journey to reconnecting with God and discovering the joy and power of a vertical marriage.