In this groundbreaking book, Dr. David Schnarch, one of the foremost experts on sexuality and relationships, explains why normal healthy couples in long-term relationships have sexual desire problems, regardless of how much they love each other or how well they communicate. In-depth examples of couples he has counselled reveal his unique understanding of common-but-difficult sexual desire problems that affect couples of all ages. Combining compassion and clinical wisdom, Dr. Schnarch explains how to use his revolutionary Four Points of Balance approach to resolve low desire, mismatched desire, sexual boredom, and the emotional gridlock that accompanies these problems. Intimacy and Desire provides a roadmap for how couples can transform common sexual desire problems into self-exploration and personal development that leads to psychological and spiritual growth, stronger relationships, and more powerful and meaningful desire for each other. It provides time-proven comprehensive solutions that help couples reconnect with each other sexually, and take their intimacy and passion to new, previously unexplored heights.
In this groundbreaking book, Dr David Schnarch, one of the foremost experts on sexuality and relationships, explains why normal healthy couples in long-term relationships have sexual-desire problems, regardless of how much they love each other or how well they communicate. In-depth examples of couples he has counselled reveal his unique understanding of common but difficult sexual-desire problems that affect couples of all ages. Combining compassion and clinical wisdom, Dr Schnarch explains how to use his revolutionary Four Points of Balance approach to resolve low desire, mismatched desire, sexual boredom, and the emotional gridlock that accompanies these problems. Intimacy & Desire provides a roadmap for how couples can transform common sexual-desire problems into self-exploration and personal development that leads to psychological and spiritual growth, stronger relationships, and more powerful and meaningful desire for each other. It provides time-proven, comprehensive solutions that help couples reconnect with each other sexually, and take their intimacy and passion to new, previously unexplored heights.
A practical step‑by‑step methodology for nurturing and sustaining our intimate relationships through first focusing on self, extending to partners, and the world We can apply the law of attraction, love languages, and every hack in the world. We can do all the yoga, spa days, workshops, and retreats we can make time for. But without an underpinning of intimacy, our experience of ourselves is soft and dreamy and lacks the kind of specificity necessary to truly know ourselves through and through. With intimacy as the foundational principle of our existence, we can build a life based on what we truly need, not what have been told we need, think we need, or what we think we should need. No matter who you are and who you like to have sex with, my intention is to arm you with a new toolkit and consciousness for cultivating the deeply connected relationships you desire and the life you deserve. Zoe Kors draws on her experience as an intimacy coach, workshop leader and sex and relationships writer, sharing her powerful--and practical--step‑by‑step methodology for nurturing and sustaining our intimate relationships over time. It addresses the essential truth that is almost universally missed in discussions of sex and intimacy: We can meet each other only to the extent that we can meet ourselves. Kors guides the reader on a five‑part journey through nine areas of opportunity for deepening intimacy with themselves, their partner, and their world, inviting them to embrace emotional, physical, and energetic self‑mastery, which is required to skillfully relate with others. Voice-driven, accessible--with the right amount of tough love--Radical Intimacy rewrites the rules (and The Rules) by: Introducing the concept of "Energetic Intimacy" as a real thing. I talk about concepts like presence and energy, in a way that is accessible and makes sense to the mainstream market (not woo-woo!) Defining and busting "The Attachment Myth"--my term for the rampant and erroneous belief that women emotionally attach to their sexual partners--rewriting the common narrative, giving women freedom and agency to own their embodied sexuality without guilt or shame. Shifting the vocabulary around sex and intimacy to feel real, organic, and unapologetic by speaking with ease and confidence about sex and sexuality--no euphemisms, no air quotes, no beating around the bush (so to speak). Telling the truth that sex is not effortless. Great sex is cultivated over time through practice. Evangelizing intimacy as an ongoing and life-altering practice that happens not just between two people, but on an individual level first. Dismantling porn-culture's stronghold on the misperception of women's bodies and sexuality so that we may respect, revere, and fall love with women (and ourselves) for the magical and varied creatures we are.
For over a decade Rekindling Desire has helped to restore and restructure sexuality in thousands of lives. This expanded edition continues the exploration of inhibited sexual desire and no-sex relationships by the author, who brings decades of knowledge and the expertise that comes from having treated almost 3,000 couples for sexual problems. Contained within are suggested strategies and exercises that help develop communication and sexual skills, as well as interesting case studies that open the doors to couples’ sexual frustrations. The shame, embarrassment, and hesitancy that individuals feel with themselves, and the resentment and blame they can feel towards their sexual partners, are explored and put into context. Whether you are married, cohabitating, or dating, or if you are 25, 45, or 75, reading this book will help renew your sexual desire and put you on the path towards healthy, pleasure-oriented sexuality.
One of the world’s most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home. Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.
In this remarkable sexual health and wellness book, Dr. David Schnarch, world-renowned sex and marital therapist and author of Passionate Marriage, offers a groundbreaking approach to resolving sexual difficulties and the relationship problems they cause. By showing couples how they can turn their worst sex and relationship disasters into personal growth and spiritual connection, Dr. Schnarch offers couples the best sex of their lives. In addition to taking an unflinchingly honest, realistic, and erotic approach to sex, Dr. Schnarch reveals the complicated emotional interactions hidden within couples' most private moments. Resurrecting Sex speaks of compassion, partnership, generosity, and integrity in adult sexual relationships, offering hope to millions of people who are struggling with sexual difficulties. Uplifting, provocative, and heartfelt, the book is organized into four sections: A crash course in sex Explanation of how sexual relationships really work Medical options and bionic solutions Vignettes of couples changing their sexual relationships Resurrecting Sex addresses all major sexual issues, including male erection problems such as rapid orgasm and delayed orgasm; women's problems with arousal and lubrication, difficulty reaching orgasm, and low desire; full coverage of Viagra (for both men and women); and other sex-enhancing drugs and medical options. Rather than dwelling on sexual techniques, this sympathetic book shows how to cure the rejection, hostility, and emotional alienation that often accompany sexual problems. Its unique method helps couples develop the love, affection, and commitment that prevent divorce and strengthen families.
Winner of the 2011 AASECT Book Award! Co-authors of Men’s Sexual Health, Michael Metz and Barry McCarthy have come together to inspire and motivate readers in their newest book, Enduring Desire. Real-life examples and clear, helpful individual and couple exercises allow readers to reach for realistic and high quality sexual satisfaction as a couple. Throughout the book, the authors promote positive, realistic sexual expectations without commercialism and the hyped, exotic promises that only set people up for disappointment. The message is down-to-earth and full of joy for all couples from their 20s to their 80s. The authors advocate the variable, flexible "Good Enough Sex" (GES) model, which validates the inherent variability and flexibility of couple sexuality and examines the biopsychosocial, multidimensional, and comprehensive roles, functions and meanings of couple sexuality.
This book challenges the fundamental paradigms in sexual-marital therapies, and provides a fresh look at the nature of intimacy and the diverse barriers to eroticism in many marriages. By integrating individual, sexual and marital therapies, this study attempts to provide a fresh look at the nature of intimacy and the diverse barriers to eroticism in marriage. The author refutes the common focus on sexual technique, calling instead for an emphasis on sexual potential.
"There is nothing more alienating than having your pleasures disputed by someone with a theory," writes Lauren Berlant. Yet the ways in which we live sexuality and intimacy have been profoundly shaped by theories - especially psychoanalytic ones, which have helped to place sexuality and desire at the center of the modern story about what a person is and how her history should be read. At the same time, other modes of explanation have been offered by popular and mass culture. In these domains, sexual desire is not deemed the core story of life; it is mixed up with romance, a particular version of the story of love. In this small theoretical novella-cum-dictionary entry, Lauren Berlant engages love and desire in separate entries. In the first entry, Desire mainly describes the feeling one person has for something else: it is organized by psychoanalytic accounts of attachment, and tells briefly the history of their importance in critical theory and practice. The second entry, on Love, begins with an excursion into fantasy, moving away from the parent-child structure so central to psychoanalysis and looking instead at the centrality of context, environment, and history. The entry on Love describes some workings of romance across personal life and commodity culture, the place where subjects start to think about fantasy on behalf of their actual lives. Whether viewed psychoanalytically, institutionally, or ideologically, love is deemed always an outcome of fantasy. Without fantasy, there would be no love. Desire/Love takes us on a tour of all of the things that sentence might mean.
