How Love Actually Ruined Christmas
How Love Actually Ruined Christmas

Author: Gary Raymond

Publisher: Parthian Books

Published: 2020-11-30

Total Pages: 160

ISBN-13: 1913640221

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RARELY HAS THE POWER OF CINEMA BEEN FELT BY SO MANY, IN SUCH OPPOSING WAYS... 'Love Actually dulls the critical senses, making those susceptible to its hallucinogenic powers think they've seen a funny, warm-hearted, romantic film about the many complex manifestations of love. Colourful Narcotics. A perfect description of a bafflingly popular film.' By any reasonable measurement, Love Actually is a bad movie. There are plenty of bad movies out there, but what gets under Gary Raymond's skin here is that it seems to have tricked so many people into thinking it's a good movie. In this hilarious, scene-by-scene analysis of the Christmas monolith that is Love Actually, Gary Raymond takes us through a suffocating quagmire of badly drawn characters, nonsensical plotlines, and open bigotry, to a climax of ill-conceived schmaltz. How Love Actually Ruined Christmas (or Colourful Narcotics) is the definitive case against a terrible movie.

Hyperbole and a Half
Hyperbole and a Half

Author: Allie Brosh

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2013-10-29

Total Pages: 384

ISBN-13: 1451666187

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#1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!

How to Ruin the Holidays
How to Ruin the Holidays

Author: Becky Monson

Publisher: Independently Published

Published: 2021-11-15

Total Pages: 238

ISBN-13:

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After a disastrous family Thanksgiving, all I wanted was to avoid anything holly and jolly this year, so an unexpected business trip seemed like the perfect escape plan . . . until I landed smack dab in the middle of a freaking winter wonderland, otherwise known as Carole Cove, Montana. It's merrier and brighter than the North Pole. The town even comes with its own Mr. Holiday-Noel Holiday, that is. Not only is he holly and jolly but he's hotter than the lattes he sells at his café. And for some reason he would love nothing more than to share the magic of the season with me. Unfortunately, this little trip of mine isn't exactly filled with good cheer. But Noel's kisses have a way of making me believe in Christmas miracles. And a miracle might be exactly what it takes to keep the holidays from being ruined forever. "Merry Christmas to me! I'm still swooning! Five beautiful stars!" -Jennifer Peel, USA Today Bestselling Author

Chasing Redbird
Chasing Redbird

Author: Sharon Creech

Publisher: Harper Collins

Published: 2012-04-24

Total Pages: 158

ISBN-13: 0061961310

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“Intriguing, delightful, and touching.” —School Library Journal (starred review) “Creech’s best yet.” —Publishers Weekly (starred review) It started out as an ordinary summer. But the minute thirteen-year-old Zinny discovered the old, overgrown trail that ran through the woods behind her family’s house, she realized that things were about to change. It was her chance to finally make people notice her, and to have a place she could call her very own. But more than that, Zinny knew that the trail somehow held the key to all kinds of questions. And that the only way to understand her family, her Aunt Jessie’s death, and herself, was to find out where it went. From Newbery Medal-winning author Sharon Creech comes a story of love, loss, and understanding, an intricately woven tale of a young girl who sets out in search of her place in the world—and discovers it in her own backyard. An ALA Best Book for Young Adults

How the Hitman Stole Christmas
How the Hitman Stole Christmas

Author: Sam Mariano

Publisher:

Published: 2020-12-31

Total Pages: 306

ISBN-13:

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JASPERI didn't plan to kidnap her. I was just doing a good deed. I saw a car stranded on the side of the road in the middle of a snowstorm and decided to help-didn't expect to get anything out of it.Even criminals can do nice things every once in a while. When I approached the driver, my motives were as pure as the snowflakes clinging to the silky strands of her long, dark hair. Her tire had popped and she didn't know how to change it. Clearly, the damsel was in distress. Unfortunately for her, I'm no white knight. Now, I'm a decisive man. Once I make a decision, it's pretty much a done deal-and it didn't take me long to decide Autumn was going home with me for the holidays, whether she wanted to or not. I was prepared for stealing Autumn to change my plans, but I wasn't prepared for her to be such a quick study. I may be the one who stole a girlfriend for Christmas, but if I'm not careful, this pretty little snowflake just might steal my heart.**How the Hitman Stole Christmas is a full-length, standalone novel.Note: this holiday romance features a bad guy hero. He's certainly not my worst, but he is a professional criminal, so if you aren't a fan of antiheroes, you may not enjoy this tale. This is not your mama's clean, wholesome Hallmark Christmas love story. There's plenty of lightness to be found between the pages (especially if you can embrace the crazy like I can), but there will be dark themes that may agitate some. There are plenty of sweet, pure-as-the-driven-snow romances available to those who want them around the holidays; this one is for those of us who like their love stories a little edgier, even at Christmastime.: )

The Worst Book in the Whole Entire World
The Worst Book in the Whole Entire World

Author: Joey Acker

Publisher:

Published: 2019-03-15

Total Pages:

ISBN-13: 9781951046095

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OH NO!!! You found The Worst Book in the Whole Entire World! Well, since you're already here I may as well tell you about it... Poor Nameless tries to explain to the reader why this book is simply the WORST book in the whole entire world. Will he succeed in his noble quest? Is he the reason this book is the worst?? Will it have a happy ending or the worst ending ever??? The Worst Book in the Whole Entire World is a humorous and witty tale for young and seasoned readers. Whatever you do though, don't read it out loud! You may catch wind of these words: toot, stinky, booger, and booty. You've been warned, but you'll still want to see what happens next!

Christmas He Loved Her
Christmas He Loved Her

Author: Juliana Stone

Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.

Published: 2013-09-24

Total Pages: 353

ISBN-13: 1402274858

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"Will appeal to readers of Cathie Linz and Susan Elizabeth Phillips."—Booklist All he wants this Christmas is her... In the small town of Crystal Lake, Christmas is a time for sledding, hot chocolate, and cozying up to the fire with those you love. For Jake Edwards, it's also time to come home and face the music. He thought there would never be anything harder than losing his brother. Turns out there is: falling in love with his brother's widow, Raine. Ever since they were little, Jesse was the Edwards brother who was always there for her, and Jake was the one who knew just how to push her buttons. Raine can't imagine a life without them, which is why it was doubly decimating when Jake left town after his brother's sudden death. Now he's back and she doesn't know whether to be mad or thrilled. Maybe both. Or maybe it will be the perfect chance for both of them to finally find happiness again.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas
How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Author: Dr. Seuss

Publisher: RH Childrens Books

Published: 2013-10-22

Total Pages: 33

ISBN-13: 0385372035

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Get in on the Christmas cheer with Dr. Seuss’s iconic holiday classic starring the Grinch and Cindy-Lou Who—guaranteed to grow your heart three sizes! Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot...but the Grinch, who lived just north of Who-ville, did NOT! Not since “’Twas the night before Christmas” has the beginning of a Christmas tale been so instantly recognizable. From the Grinch and his dog, Max, to Cindy-Lou and all the residents of Who-ville, this heartwarming story about the effects of the Christmas spirit will warm even the coldest and smallest of hearts. Like mistletoe, candy canes, and caroling, the Grinch is a mainstay of the holidays, and his story is perfect for readers young and old.

Sometimes I Lie
Sometimes I Lie

Author: Alice Feeney

Publisher: Flatiron Books

Published: 2018-03-13

Total Pages: 272

ISBN-13: 1250144833

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ALICE FEENEYS NEW YORK TIMES AND INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER “Boldly plotted, tightly knotted—a provocative true-or-false thriller that deepens and darkens to its ink-black finale. Marvelous.” —AJ Finn, author of The Woman in the Window My name is Amber Reynolds. There are three things you should know about me: 1. I’m in a coma. 2. My husband doesn’t love me anymore. 3. Sometimes I lie. Amber wakes up in a hospital. She can’t move. She can’t speak. She can’t open her eyes. She can hear everyone around her, but they have no idea. Amber doesn’t remember what happened, but she has a suspicion her husband had something to do with it. Alternating between her paralyzed present, the week before her accident, and a series of childhood diaries from twenty years ago, this brilliant psychological thriller asks: Is something really a lie if you believe it's the truth?

The Holiday Ex-Files
The Holiday Ex-Files

Author: Jennifer Peel

Publisher: Independently Published

Published: 2021-10-19

Total Pages: 280

ISBN-13:

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Once upon a time people called me the holiday queen. But catching my husband under the Christmas tree with another woman kind of did something to me. Like make me digitally crop him out of all our wedding photos and post them online. Who knew that post would go viral? Thanks to all the requests I received to do the same for other jilted partners, I started a new business called, the Holiday Ex-Files. And I couldn't be happier. Well . . . at least I'm not unhappy. Then along comes my ex-husband's best friend, Noah Cullen. Yep, like the vampires. He's extremely gorgeous like them too. He has a plan to help me believe in the magic of holidays again. But the more I'm around him, I begin to think he's the magical one, and that perhaps I picked the wrong best friend to begin with. Maybe, just maybe, it will be a very merry Christmas after all. Get ready for a laugh-out-loud, heartwarming holiday rom-com, perfect for any season, by USA Today bestselling author Jennifer Peel.