Those who have had a narcissistic parent can testify to how damaging it can be to one's psyche. Narcissistic parents lack empathy, show a severe sense of entitlement to micromanage the lives of their children and often subject their children to neglect, as well as emotional, psychological and physical abuse. From the unique challenges daughters of narcissistic fathers face to the ways in which adverse childhood experiences affect our brains, Shahida Arabi's insightful essays resonate deeply with those who have been raised by narcissistic parents. In this new essay collection, Arabi explores how narcissistic abuse in childhood can set us up for trauma repetition in adulthood, affecting how we navigate relationships, the self, and the world. She pinpoints the toxic traits and behaviors of narcissistic mothers and fathers, exposing how covert abuse insidiously plays out in these specific dynamics. She offers the essential tools, skill sets and healing modalities for survivors who have undergone a lifetime's worth of abuse, helping them to break the cycle once and for all for future generations.
In this compelling book, Elan Golomb identifies the crux of the emotional and psychological problems of millions of adults. Simply put, the children of narcissist—offspring of parents whose interest always towered above the most basic needs of their sons and daughters—share a common belief: They believe they do not have the right to exist. The difficulties experienced by adult children of narcissists can manifest themselves in many ways: for examples, physical self-loathing that takes form of overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; a self-destructive streak that causes poor job performance and rocky personal relationships; or a struggle with the self that is perpetuated in the adult's interaction with his or her own children. These dilemmas are both common and correctable, Dr. Golomb tells us. With an empathic blend of scholarship and case studies, along with her own personal narrative of her fight for self, Dr. Golomb plumbs the depths of this problem, revealing its mysterious hold on the affairs of otherwise bright, aware, motivated, and worthy people. Trapped in the Mirror explores. the nature of the paralysis and lack of motivation so many adults feel stress and its role in exacerbating childhood wrongs why do many of our relationships seem to be "reruns" of the past how one's body image can be formed by faulty parenting how anger must be acknowledge to be overcome and, most important, how even the most traumatized self can be healed. Rooted in a profoundly humanist traditional approach, and suffused with the benefit of the latest knowledge about intrafamily relationships, Trapped in the Mirror offers more than the average self-help book; it is truly the first self-heal book for millions.
The first book specifically for daughters suffering from the emotional abuse of selfish, self-involved mothers,Will I Ever Be Good Enough?provides the expert assistance you need in order to overcome this debilitating history and reclaim your life for yourself. Drawing on over two decades of experience as a therapist specializing in women's psychology and health, psychotherapist Dr. Karyl McBride helpsyou recognize the widespread effects of this maternal emotional abuse and guides you as you create an individualized program for self-protection, resolution, and complete recovery.An estimated 1.5 million American women have narcissistic personality disorder, which makes them so insecure and overbearing, insensitive and domineering that they can psychologically damage their daughters for life. Daughters of narcissistic mothers learn that maternal love is not unconditional, and that it is given only when they behave in accordance with their mothers' often unreasonable expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters consequently have difficulty overcoming their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, sadness, and emotional emptiness. They may also have a terrible fear of abandonment that leads them to form unhealthy love relationships, as well as a tendency to perfectionism and unrelenting self-criticism, or to self-sabotage and frustration.Herself the recovering daughter of a narcissistic mother, Dr. McBride includes her personal struggle, which adds a profound level of authority to her work, along with the perspectives of the hundreds of suffering daughters she's interviewed over the years. Their stories of how maternal abuse has manifested in their lives -- as well as how they have successfully overcome its effects -- show you that you're not alone and that you can take back your life and have the controlyouwant.Dr. McBride's step-by-step program will enable you to:(1) Recognize your own experience with maternal narcissism and its effects on all aspects of your life (2) Discover how you have internalized verbal and nonverbal messages from your mother and how these have translated into a strong desire to overachieve or a tendency to self-sabotage (3) Construct a step-by-step program to reclaim your life and enhance your sense of self, a process that includes creating a psychological separation from your mother and breaking the legacy of abuse. You will also learn how not to repeat your mother's mistakes with your own daughter.Warm and sympathetic, filled with the examples of women who have established healthy boundaries with their hurtful mothers,Will I Ever Be Good Enough?encourages and inspires you as it aids your recovery.
Being a parent is usually all about giving of yourself to foster your child's growth and development. But what happens when this isn't the case? Some parents dismiss the needs of their children, asserting their own instead, demanding attention and reassurance from even very young children. This may especially be the case when a parent has narcissistic tendencies or narcissistic personality disorder. From the author of Working with the Self-Absorbed and Loving the Self-Absorbed, this major revision of a self-help classic offers a step-by-step approach to resolving conflict and building a meaningful relationship with a narcissistic parent. Children of the Self-Absorbed offers clear definitions of narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder to help you identify the extent of your parent's problem. You'll learn the different types of destructive narcissism and how to recognize their effects on relationships. With the aid of proven techniques, you'll discover that you're not helpless against your parent's behavior and that you needn't consider giving up on the relationship. Instead, realistic strategies and steps are suggested for learning to set mutually agreed upon behaviors that can help you fulfill your needs and expectations.
Now a New York Times bestseller! If you grew up with an emotionally immature, unavailable, or selfish parent, you may have lingering feelings of anger, loneliness, betrayal, or abandonment. You may recall your childhood as a time when your emotional needs were not met, when your feelings were dismissed, or when you took on adult levels of responsibility in an effort to compensate for your parent’s behavior. These wounds can be healed, and you can move forward in your life. In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect, and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents’ emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you’ll learn how to create positive, new relationships so you can build a better life. Discover the four types of difficult parents: The emotional parent instills feelings of instability and anxiety The driven parent stays busy trying to perfect everything and everyone The passive parent avoids dealing with anything upsetting The rejecting parent is withdrawn, dismissive, and derogatory
This is a workbook designed to help adult children of covertly narcissistic parents understand their family dynamics, how growing up in a narcissistic system has influenced their present lives, and finally how to heal and move on. This is not a book about understanding the narcissistic parent, that focus just continues the dysfunctional behavior learned in early childhood. This workbook is designed to help those who find themselves stuck in a loop of people pleasing, and codependency finally come out of the mirror and into their own wonderful true selves. There is little understanding of narcissism and even less around the subject of children who are raised in narcissistic families. Much research has gone into this project, but the field is still new and many clinicians still dismiss it as a diagnosis. However, for those who have problems of codependency but neither parent was an alcoholic or drug addict, finding qualified help can be quite difficult. Many therapists don't know that there even is such a thing as covert narcissism! Take your time with the workbook, join with some friends or even start a small group. This would also be a wonderful resource for therapists to use with their clients.
Are you an adult child of a narcissistic mother? Do you suspect your mother has Narcissistic Personality Disorder? Caroline Foster, an experienced life coach, will lead you into a painful path of awareness, but she will also give you concrete advice on how to handle your toxic mother and change your life for the better. If you read this book: You will discover all the reasons why your childhood was so traumatic. You will learn how to handle your narcissistic mother. You will discover all of the dysfunctional beliefs and habits that you developed during your childhood. You will learn how to contrast Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms. The issue of toxic mothers undeniably challenges the status quo in various ways, but most certainly needs to be addressed. Adult children of narcissistic parents are often plagued with such an abundance of guilt and sense of deep obligation and shame that it causes them to feel duty-bound to keep whatever happened in the family secret, even when it is destroying their lives. It's really difficult to share your experience in this case, because narcissists, and especially a narcissistic mother, can be very good at creating the perfect family image for outsiders looking in. The solution is not forgiving or forgetting. You should understand your situation and work on your self-development in order to take back control of your life. Book Contents RECOGNIZING THE PROBLEM What is Pathological Narcissism Inside the Mind of a Narcissist Types of Narcissism Overt Grandiose Narcissism Covert Narcissism Narcissistic Strategies of Manipulation How the narcissist controls you Pathological Narcissists as Parents Signs of Narcissistic Parenting THE NARCISSISTIC MOTHER Enablers (enabler father) The Narcissistic Mother and The Roles She Chooses for Her Children Types of Narcissistic Mothers Narcissistic Mothers and Their Sons Narcissistic Mothers and their Daughters Effects of narcissistic abuse on Adult Children SOLUTIONS Protect Yourself from Narcissistic Mother How to Handle a Narcissistic Mother If You Live with Her No Contact with Narcissistic Mother Taking Back Your Power Move Out from Toxic Environment: Practical Tips Caring for Aging Narcissistic Mother HEALING Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) Emotional flashbacks Toxic Shame Self-abandonment Inner critic Social anxiety Self-healing Tips Even if you were born in the wrong place, and you grew up dealing with a narcissistic mother, you can leave the past behind and build a better future. It's never too late, let's start now!
Growing up with a parent who is self-absorbed is difficult, and they may become more difficult to deal with as they age. This essential book shows how to cope with your aging parent's narcissistic behavior, and provides tips to help protect yourself and your children from their self-absorbed, destructive actions. As your self-absorbed parent grows older and becomes more dependent on you, hurtful relationships may resurface and become further strained. In the tradition of Children of the Self-Absorbed, author Nina Brown offers the first book for adult children of aging narcissistic or self-absorbed parents. You will learn practical, powerful strategies for navigating the intense negative feelings that your parents can incite, as well as tips to protect your children from the criticism, blame, or hostility that may exist between you and their grandparent. In this book, you will gain greater awareness of how and why your parent's self-absorbed behaviors and attitudes get worse, and develop strategies to manage the negative feelings that can arise as a result. You'll also learn to reduce the shame and guilt that may be felt when you feel like you don't want to be a caretaker. Finally, you'll learn to set limits with your parent so you can stay sane during this difficult time. Having an aging parent can be stressful enough, but dealing with an aging narcissistic or self-absorbed parent is especially challenging. This essential guide will help you through.
