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Author: Adam Rex
Publisher: Harper Collins
Published: 2010
Total Pages: 340
ISBN-13: 0061970301
DOWNLOAD EBOOKAfter being bitten by a vampire, not only is fifteen-year-old Doug doomed eternally to be fat, but now he must also save himself from the desperate host of a public-access-cable vampire-hunting television show that is on the verge of cancellation.
Author: Andrew Fox
Publisher: Ballantine Books
Published: 2003-07-01
Total Pages: 354
ISBN-13: 0345464443
DOWNLOAD EBOOKHe’s undead, overweight, and can’t get a date Vampire, nosferatu, creature of the night—whatever you call him—Jules Duchon has lived (so to speak) in New Orleans far longer than there have been drunk coeds on Bourbon Street. Weighing in at a whopping four hundred and fifty pounds, swelled up on the sweet, rich blood of people who consume the fattiest diet in the world, Jules is thankful he can’t see his reflection in a mirror. When he turns into a bat, he can’t get his big ol’ butt off the ground. What’s worse, after more than a century of being undead, he’s watched his neighborhood truly go to hell—and now, a new vampire is looking to drive him out altogether. See, Jules had always been an equal opportunity kind of vampire. And while he would admit that the blood of a black woman is sweeter than the blood of a white man, Jules never drank more than his fair share of either. Enter Malice X . Young, cocky, and black, Malice warns Jules that his days of feasting on sisters and brothers are over. He tells Jules he’d better confine himself to white victims—or else face the consequences. And then, just to prove he isn’t kidding, Malice burns Jules’s house to the ground. With the help of Maureen, the morbidly obese, stripper-vampire who made him, and Doodlebug, an undead cross-dresser who (literally) flies in from the coast—Jules must find a way to contend with the hurdles that life throws at him . . . without getting a stake through the heart. It’s enough to give a man the blues.
Author: Johnny B Truant
Publisher:
Published: 2024-04-29
Total Pages: 0
ISBN-13: 9781964578002
DOWNLOAD EBOOKWhen overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin meets a vampire, he wakes to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever created ... doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.
Author: Johnny B. Truant
Publisher: Johnny B. Truant
Published: 2024-05-01
Total Pages: 160
ISBN-13:
DOWNLOAD EBOOKImmortality Has Met Its Match... Ever since the Ring of Fire, the world's vampires have seen their mortality. They won’t live forever after all — not if the angels who created them decide to snuff them like candles. What do the angels want? What did their command to “restore balance” truly mean? For most, the angels’ decrees mean mass murder and mass turnings … but the humans aren’t sheep, and won’t just lie down and take it forever. As Deacon Maurice tries to maintain order with Reginald by his side, panic consumes the Vampire Nation. The center begins to fall apart and chaos grows like cancer. But as war between vampires and humans threatens, Reginald begins to discover strange new abilities within him: to navigate through blood history like no other vampire before him. To glamour those who can’t be glamoured. And seemingly, to stop time itself. Fear has reached its tipping point. War is close. Reginald might hold the key to the angels’ mystery … but whatever could help him intervene just might be too late.
Author: Andrew Fox
Publisher: Ballantine Books
Published: 2004-08-03
Total Pages: 450
ISBN-13: 0345478614
DOWNLOAD EBOOKAfter morphing into 187 very large white rats in the name of self-preservation, Jules Duchon is back to his portly self, a member of that secret class of New Orleans citizens known as the undead. Though he would like nothing better than to spend his nights raising hell and biting flesh in his beloved French Quarter, duty calls when an exclusive club of blue blood vampires demands that the 450-pound cabbie find out who is attacking its young and beautiful members. Adding insult to injury, he has to enlist the help of a former foe: a black vampire named Preston. What’s a vampire to do? Without the love of a woman to ease his pain, Jules isn’t convinced that his undead life is worth living. He doesn’t desire Doodlebug (she may be a woman now but Jules knew her back when she was just a boy) any more than he longs for Daphne, a rat catcher who nourishes a crush the size of Jules. No, only Maureen will do. Once a beautiful stripper with nothing but curve after curve to her bodacious body, now she is mere dust in a jar. But Jules will move heaven and earth to get her back . . . even if it means pulling her back from the dead.
Author: Mo O'Hara
Publisher: Square Fish
Published: 2019-02-26
Total Pages: 224
ISBN-13: 1250294126
DOWNLOAD EBOOKMy FANGtastically Evil Vampire Pet, the epic spin-off of Mo O'Hara's New York Times bestselling My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish series features an aspiring evil scientist, paranormal pets, and plenty of hilarious summer camp shenanigans. Welcome to Camp Mwhaaa-haa-ha-a-watha! This summer is going to be epic. Epically evil, that is. ‘Cause I’m going to Evil Scientist Summer Camp! No annoying little brothers. No annoying zombie goldfish. Just me, my best friend Sanj, our notebook of evil plans, and my truly evil (and totally forbidden) vampire kitten Fang. We’ve got it all planned out. Okay, so maybe I didn’t expect for the totally not-evil Geeky Girl to show up, or for Sanj to find a new partner to work with, but there’s no way I’m going to let them ruin my summer. Evil Emperor of the Camp, here I come! Signed, The Great and Powerful Mark
Author: Zoraida Córdova
Publisher: Imprint
Published: 2020-09-22
Total Pages: 282
ISBN-13: 1250230004
DOWNLOAD EBOOKEleven fresh vampire stories from young adult fiction’s leading voices fill this bestselling anthology—including V.E. Schwab's First Kill, now a major Netflix adaptation! "Boundary-pushing... Stories that stake a new claim on old tropes." —Publishers Weekly, starred review In this delicious new collection, you’ll find stories about lurking vampires of social media, rebellious vampires hungry for more than just blood, eager vampires coming out—and going out for their first kill—and other bold, breathtaking, dangerous, dreamy, eerie, iconic, powerful creatures of the night. Welcome to the evolution of the vampire—and a revolution on the page. Vampires Never Get Old includes stories by authors both bestselling and acclaimed, including Samira Ahmed, Dhonielle Clayton, Zoraida Córdova and Natalie C. Parker, Tessa Gratton, Heidi Heilig, Julie Murphy, Mark Oshiro, Rebecca Roanhorse, Laura Ruby, Victoria “V. E.” Schwab, and Kayla Whaley. An Imprint Book "Vampire fans, sink your teeth into this satisfying collection." —Kirkus Reviews
Author: Johnny B. Truant
Publisher: Johnny B. Truant
Published:
Total Pages: 782
ISBN-13:
DOWNLOAD EBOOKThis 250,000-word "full saga" collection includes ALL NINE BOOKS in the Unicorn Western Series! Cast out from the magical kingdom of The Realm and into the dying desert of the Sands beyond, Marshal Clint Gulliver and his unicorn Edward have finally found peace in the small and dusty town of Solace. But when both the fracturing worlds and Clint’s bride-to-be are thrust into peril by an old foe, the gunslinger must come out of retirement and aim his seven-shooters at the dark magic and those who bring it. An epic quest hurls marshal and unicorn across the endless desert in pursuit of the dark rider Dharma Kold and his unicorn of a different color, where they must battle their way back toward The Realm to uncover the truth...and mayhap save the worlds that hang in the balance. From the creators of Yesterday’s Gone (Platt) and Fat Vampire (Truant) comes this reinvention of both the western genre and unicorn lore. Written for children and teens — but complex and awesome enough for adult readers — Unicorn Western is “Harry Potter without wizards but with gunslings, talking unicorns, epic fights, and more turkey pie.”
Author: Greg Crites
Publisher: greg crites
Published: 2006-03
Total Pages: 177
ISBN-13: 9781411682436
DOWNLOAD EBOOKWhat could possibly bring together a 450 pound vampire slayer, a drunken, acid-tongued detective, a good natured carpenter, bureaucratic vampires, giant anacondas, mutant vampire bats, Ho Ho's, Twinkies and 'more one-liners than a night at the comedy club'? Dunkin, the vampire slayer blends all this discordance and more into a hilarious adventure that moves from the muggy heat of Florida to the muggier heat of the Amazon.....If Carl Hiaasson, Tim Dorsey and Dave Barry collaborated on a vampire story, it may have turned out like this absurd romp.... This is part one of a trilogy. Dunkin II will begin shipping April 3rd.
Author: Raven Hart
Publisher: Random House Digital, Inc.
Published: 2007
Total Pages: 333
ISBN-13: 0345498569
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