For almost a century the concept of guilt, as embedded in drive theory, has dominated psychoanalytic thought. Increasingly, however, investigators are focusing on shame as a key aspect of human behavior. This volume captures a range of compelling viewpoints on the role of shame in psychological development, psychopathology, and the therapeutic process. Donald Nathanson has assembled internationally prominent authorities, engaging them in extensive dialogue about their areas of expertise. Concise introductions to each chapter place the authors both historically and theoretically, and outline their emphases and contributions to our understanding of shame. Including many illustrative clinical examples, the book covers such topics as the relationship between shame and narcissism, shame's central place in affect theory, psychosis and shame, and shame in the literature of French psychoanalysis and philosophy.
The richest, most fulfilling love of your life is yet to come! "The Authentic Heart offers practical, wise, and compassionate guidance for midlife love."--Jack Kornfield, author of A Path with Heart and After the Ecstasy, the Laundry "The Authentic Heart is a groundbreaking, insightful, warmly written book that I highly recommend to anyone wanting more loving, joyful relationships. John Amodeo addresses with great clarity, wisdom, and practicality the key steps that are necessary for building authentic, mature, loving connections--not only with others, but also with oneself."--John Bradshaw, New York Times bestselling author of Healing the Shame that Binds You "Just what millions want to know--not only how to make love last but how to make lasting love new again and again. This warmhearted and clearheaded book is full of practical wisdom."--Gay Hendricks, Ph.D., and Kathlyn Hendricks, Ph.D., authors of Conscious Loving and The Conscious Heart As you enter midlife, you may feel that something you've always longed for has never happened. Frustrated, you may give up on love or cling to young images of romantic love, hoping that another person will furnish happiness. You may experience a growing sense of depression, anxiety, or cynicism. But as psychotherapist and relationship expert Dr. John Amodeo explains, authentic love takes time and maturity. At midlife, you hold the extraordinary potential to become more fully awake and alive in your relationships than ever before. In this groundbreaking book, Dr. Amodeo helps you rediscover love at its best. You'll learn how to overcome the psychological obstacles that have kept you from developing satisfying relationships. And you'll learn the eight enriching steps that release your authentic self for the fullness of genuine connection. Whether you're seeking true love for the first time or wish to deepen the joy and meaning in your current relationship, The Authentic Heart guides you along the path to a more vibrant partnership in the prime of your life.
"It is my feeling that debilitating shame and guilt are at the root of all dysfunctions in families,” says Jane Middelton-Moz. A few common characteristics of adults shamed in childhood: You may suffer extreme shyness, embarrassment and feelings of being inferior to others. You don’t believe you make mistakes, you believe you are a mistake. You feel controlled from the outside and from within. You feel that normal spontaneous expression is blocked. You may suffer from debilitating guilt; you apologize constantly. You have little sense of emotional boundaries; you feel constantly violated by others; you frequently build false boundaries. If you see yourself in any of these characteristics, you can learn how shame keeps you from being the person you were born to be and how to change that. Shame And Guilt describes how debilitating shame is created and fostered in childhood and how it manifests itself in adulthood and in intimate relationships. Through the use of myths and fairytales to portray different shaming environments, Dr. Middelton-Moz allows you to reach the shamed child within you and to add clarity to what could be difficult concepts. Read Shame and Guilt — you’re worth it.
There are two kinds of shame. Legitimate shame is a tool in the hands of a forgiving God; we feel it when we recognize our sin and turn to Him. False shame, on the other hand, is a tool in the hands of the enemy; Satan uses it to convince believers that they are not worthy of God's love and acceptance, and to turn them away from fellowship with Him. In From Shame to Beauty, readers will discover how to arm themselves against false shame and live confidently in the knowledge of God's love. This interactive study, ideal for individuals or small groups, guides readers through a process of healing from false shame that has plagued their lives and relationships. From Shame to Beauty includes eight weeks of study. Topics include ''Characteristics of Shame, '' ''Cause of Shame, '' ''Contagion of Shame, '' ''Cure for Shame'' and much more. Each week's study examines how false shame threatens the lives of believers, digs into Scripture to find out what God's Word has to say about it, offers readers the opportunity to reflect on their own struggle with shame and suggests practical action steps to help readers apply what they have learn
From the FOREWORD by Dan G. Blazer, M.D., Ph.D. Professor of Psychiatry, Duke University Medical Center "Occasionally, a writer on psychology and biblical faith comes along who can work 'from the center.' J. Christopher Garrison is such a writer. Let me explain what I mean by working from the center. No person who is thoroughly committed to his or her religious faith can really put that faith aside and work with scientific objectivity in blending the essence of that faith with the subject matter of empirical science. Even if someone could, I doubt that the project would be of great interest. Such a person would not be someone I would define as working from the center. A person who can work from the center in blending psychology and biblical faith is a person who can work not so much from the center of extremes as from the center of their being-from their spirit if you will. This ability shows itself when one has opened his or her innermost being to the Spirit of God and his or her mind and reason to modern psychology and truly grasped as a result the principles and concepts of what psychology is really about. This is what Garrison has achieved. In Garrison's Psychology of the Spirit, psychology is not so much integrated as it is enriched. Reading the end product deepens one's faith and one's understanding. Such a psychology is not the mere providing of formulas for meeting daily life crises. It is instead the total unfolding and renewal of one's inner being."
We know shame can be a morally valuable emotion that helps us to realize when we fail to be the kinds of people we aspire to be. We feel shame when we fail to live up to the norms, standards, and ideals that we value as part of a virtuous life. But the lived reality of shame is far more complex and far darker than this -- the gut-level experience of shame that has little to do with failing to reach our ideals. We feel shame viscerally about nudity, sex, our bodies, and weaknesses or flaws that we can't control. Shame can cause self-destructive and violent behavior, and chronic shame can cause painful psychological damage. Is shame a valuable moral emotion, or would we be better off without it? In Naked, Krista K. Thomason takes a hard look at the reality of shame. The experience of it, she argues, involves a tension between identity and self-conception: namely, what causes me shame both overshadows me (my self-conception) and yet is me (my identity). We are liable to feelings of shame because we are not always who we take ourselves to be. Thomason extends her thought-provoking analysis to our current social and political landscape: shaming has increased dramatically because of the proliferation of social media platforms. And although these online shaming practices can be used in harmful ways, they can also root out those who express racist and sexist views, and enable marginalized groups to confront oppression. Is more and continued shaming therefore better, and is there moral promise in using shame in this way? Thomason grapples with these and numerous other questions. Her account of shame makes sense of its good and bad features, its numerous gradations and complexity, and ultimately of its essential place in our moral lives.
This volume reports on the growing body of knowledge on shame and guilt, integrating findings from the authors' original research program with other data emerging from social, clinical, personality, and developmental psychology. Evidence is presented to demonstrate that these universally experienced affective phenomena have significant implications for many aspects of human functioning, with particular relevance for interpersonal relationships. --From publisher's description.
An intimate look at the full spectrum of shame—often masked by addiction, promiscuity, perfectionism, self-loathing, or narcissism—that offers a new, positive route forward Encounters with embarrassment, guilt, self-consciousness, remorse, etc. are an unavoidable part of everyday life, and they sometimes have lessons to teach us—about our goals and values, about the person we expect ourselves to be. In contrast to the prevailing cultural view of shame as a uniformly toxic influence, Shame is a book that approaches the subject of shame as an entire family of emotions which share a “painful awareness of self.” Challenging widely-accepted views within the self-esteem movement, author Joseph Burgo argues that self-esteem does NOT thrive in the soil of non-stop praise and encouragement, but rather depends upon setting and meeting goals, living up to the expectations we hold for ourselves, and finally sharing our joy in achievement with the people who matter most to us. Along the way, listening to and learning from our encounters with shame will go further than affirmations and positive self-talk in helping us to build authentic self-esteem. Richly illustrated with clinical stories from Burgo's 35 years in private practice, Shame also describes the myriad ways that unacknowledged shame often hides behind a broad spectrum of mental disorders including social anxiety, narcissism, addiction, and masochism.
The female body, with its history as an object of social control, expectation, and manipulation, is central to understanding the gendered construction of shame. Through the study of 20th-century literary texts, The Female Face of Shame explores the nexus of femininity, female sexuality, the female body, and shame. It demonstrates how shame structures relationships and shapes women's identities. Examining works by women authors from around the world, these essays provide an interdisciplinary and transnational perspective on the representations, theories, and powerful articulations of women's shame.
This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author. "I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw,"to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed." Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.
