Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don’t have a text messaging plan. I paid 25 cents to get fired. Your girlfriend dumped you, your car broke down, your boss passed you up for the big promotion. Life’s not fair, but there is one sure-fire way to ease your pain–laughing at someone else who had an even worse day than you did. Enter the devastatingly funny world of F My Life, where calamity is comedy. Covering every disastrous pratfall in love, work, family-life, and more, F My Life proffers other people’s ruinous, real-life happenings to brighten your gloomiest day: someone getting dumped through a greeting card, ignored at their birthday party, or insulted by their own grandmother. Spanning everything from ironic twists of fate to down-right shameful moments, F My Life’s squirm-inducing stories are schadenfreude at its finest. So today, take solace in knowing that at least you’re not that guy. There now, don’t you feel better? Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. Today, my mom walked in on me looking at a 1978 Playboy. She asked if I found it in the basement. I said yes. Then I realized she was the centerfold. Today, I got in line at the grocery store. The woman in front of me looked right at me, turned to her friend, and said “That reminds me, I forgot to get acne cream.”
Painfully awkward. Hilariously honest. Best of all, it happened to someone else. It’s a fact of life: No matter how lame, embarrassing, or downright crappy your day has been, someone else, somewhere on earth, has had it worse. F My Life World Tour collects the best of life’s most horrible moments, shared by people around the globe on the phenomenally popular FMyLife.com, which now gets more than 2 million hits per day, from Italy to Indonesia and Pakistan to Peru. If you’ve ever said “F my life,” get ready to feel a little better—at someone else’s expense. Includes never-before-seen entries submitted to FMyLife.com
In life, the choices we make determine our levels of success or regret. Ultra successful people (the superrich) rarely take a look back at the lessons of the past. That privilege is often reserved for the regretful, and whether we show it or not, many of us have our secret regrets. What if you realized that you were a regretful success? But that doesn’t make sense, does it? Who would regret their success? Who would want to struggle? What if those struggles were needed to help in revealing your character and what you thought of as weaknesses turned out to be your greatest strengths? How would you function knowing you had to struggle to get to where you wanted to go? Would you do it? Could you do it? There are so many questions, and over time I’ve realized that asking questions will not only get you answers but will also lead to more questions. If you don’t know when to stop asking questions, then the answers cease to be of use, and when the answers aren’t useful, you stop asking questions and so on and so forth. But how can you fix a system if you’re not a part of it? According to developmental psychology, there are certain keystone events that should happen over the average lifetime. What happens when that order changes? Does that mean that the rules don’t apply? That doesn’t sound like a normal train of thought, does it? But what is normal anyway? I’ve never been normal or average. I’m a mystery, a conundrum, a 1,000-piece puzzle with a single piece missing. The missing piece used to change every day, but over time, it became clear that my missing piece was indeed a “missing peace” and that I would need the God’s help and plenty of heart to ‑ fight my way through numerous battles, facing more than my fair share of adversities. After God sat me down to talk over something, I told him, “Thank you.” But then I also said, “That’s f**ked up, God.”
Answering the Existential Question of What the F*@# to Do with Your Life with Spot-On Humor (and Profanity) If you've tried and failed to find your purpose in life, you're going to need expert help. From the author of What the F*@# Should I Make For Dinner?, this laugh-out-loud career guide will set you straight. Take a brief career quiz to find your perfect match, and get the inside scoop on a wide variety of crappy careers, plus tips on breaking in, leaving you with no excuse not to embark on a fulfilling vocation as: Electrician Therapist T-Shirt Cannon Operator Dental Hygienist Mortician Lobbyist . . . And more. And don't worry: if that perfect career eludes or you fail at everything else, you can always be a realtor.
In his first ever book, The IF in Life: How to Get Off Life’s Sidelines and Become Your Best Self, NFL running back and Dancing with the Stars champion Rashad Jennings shares his inspiring story and experiences, imparts practical advice, and encourages readers to follow their dreams. As a kid, Rashad Jennings dreamed of one day playing in the NFL, but the odds were stacked against him—he was an overweight kid with glasses, asthma, and a 0.6 GPA. Today, Rashad is a record-setting running back who has played with the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Oakland Raiders, and the New York Giants. In The IF in Life, Rashad writes about the decisions that shaped his life. From overcoming injuries and setbacks to reaching goals and everything in between, Rashad’s transparency about his journey will encourage readers to hold on to faith in the midst of uncertainty and win big in life. Perfect for football fans of all ages, this book also features photos from Rashad’s childhood, college years, and professional career.
She was the girl who seemed to have it all, and then she lost it all.Raised by wealthy French parents, she married her first love, fresh out of college in Miami Beach. She followed her handsome jewish husband back to his native New York, where she thrived in the fashion industry, and quickly became the "it girl" of Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week. She faced her share of challenges: the tragic death of her doting father, an oppressive marriage with a husband increasingly obsessed with orthodox judaism, and her first born diagnosed on the spectrum of autism.And then her world turned upside downWhen federal agents knocked on her door one tragic day, her life changed forever. Accused of internet fraud for selling jeans online, De La Mare-Kenny found herself serving a lengthy sentence in a medium - high security federal prison. She ended up doing time that didn't seemingly fit the crime. With no way out, she faced the heart wrenching separation from her three small children, the youngest, then just a baby and her oldest facing the debilitating regression of his mental disability.She tells the story of a mother's life-long fight and sacrifice for her children. The agony and the guilt of being ripped away from them, when they needed her the most. Her personal triumph both over the unjust system that imprisoned her and the many tragedies that marred her life. This is a must-read, riveting tale of the harsh life behind bars, where one woman who was unlikely to survive had to dig deep within herself, to find the strength to make her way back to her children. And, against all odds, used her adversities to succeed and propel herself from shackles, to living a charmed life in dreamy Monte-Carlo.-Rev. Tracy L. Clark, Motivational Speaker and Author of GOD WHERE ARE YOU? IT'S ME."I call Ingrid my rags to riches story and I am not just talking wealth. When I met Ingrid, she was on the verge of losing everything. From her home, to her work to her toxic relationship. Ingrid's gift has always been her children. She will protect them at all costs. She truly loves and honors them like no other. In my humble opinion, she knows very well they saved her life on many levels!What makes a soul successful in life is realizing they need to let go of the past emotionally and, embrace the lessons. INGRID DID THIS! A hard day turned into a new beginning. A struggle turned into a gift. A spark of inspiration and creation turned into a passion. She never took no for an answer.-Dara Kaplan, Partner and Co-Founder of the Manhattan and Miami based, Wunderlich Kaplan Communications. Dara has been featured on Forbes, CNN, Fox News, NYPost, Huffington Post, Daily Mail, Inc.com, Elite Daily and more."It has been truly an honor to watch Ingrid own her truth, rise from ashes, write her destiny, create a brand from the ground up and come to dominate the wellness space. As a branding expert, watching Ingrid so expertly build a tribe of women that have coalesced around and have continuously championed has been nothing short of brilliant and beautiful. She is a true trailblazer and cunning marketer in the digital brand building space. To know Ingrid is to know the personification of perseverance and walking in ones truth."*"Ingrid De La Mare-Kenny truly changed my life for the better. I was immediately intrigued by her charisma, warmth, unapologetic attitude. She has helped me and continues to be such a mentor to me. Not only is she one of my best friends, she also has a huge community full of women who TRUST her. This industry needs her- her book is an absolute gem. Ingrid's adversity has given her depth & relatability which the reader will feel throughout the book. Anyone who reads it will be immediately inspired while feeling her warmth .- Lauryn Evarts Bosstick, Author of The Skinny Confidential: A Babe's Sexy Sexy, Sassy Fitness and Lifestyle Guide and Co-Host of entrepreneurial podcast, The Skinny Confidential HIM & HER featured in SHAPE, Women's Health
#1 New York Times Bestseller Over 10 million copies sold In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.
Family constellations work has broadened and developed in many different fields as a method of counseling and therapy. In addition to constellations in organizations and schools, applying this approach to working with illness and disease has expanded the potential for healing effects in the field of medicine as well. A view of transgenerational entanglements and family dynamics casts a new light on health and disease, and the insights gained from constellations with illness and health problems have led to a more holistic view of those who are ill. In Even if it Costs me my Life, Stephan Hausner aims to provide a picture of the healing potential of systemic constellations, entering into the reciprocal effects of family dynamics and illness. Extensive use of case studies demonstrates this technique in action, revealing how existing illnesses and pathologies are rooted within the family dynamic, and setting up healing postures to facilitate growth, development, and direction.
The Charles F. Stanley Life Principles Bible, with over a million sold to date, is designed to lead believers into a life-changing relationship with Jesus Christ, and to help them experience the Good News about God’s mighty kindness and love. The updated second edition is the best way to experience this bestselling classic—with a completely new design featuring our easy-to-read Comfort Print typeface, 100 specially designed maps and charts that bring Biblical places and themes to life, and over 43,000 cross references to enrich your study of the Word. Features include: 30 Life Principles articles highlight Dr. Stanley’s essentials for Christian living More than 2,500 Life Lessons verse notes bring to life the practical and personal nature of God’s Word to us A listing of over 300 verses revealing God’s promises throughout the Bible that encourage, strengthen, and bring hope Answers to Life's Questions and What the Bible Says About articles bring scriptural insight to bear on topics of special importance to every believer Topical indexes give immediate access to hundreds of life-giving principles and promises throughout the Old and New Testaments Book introductions provide an overview of the themes and literary structure of each book and alert readers to important principles they’ll encounter as they read New for the 2nd Edition, 100 maps and charts that help important Biblical places and themes come alive and over 43,000 cross references to enrich your study