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Author: Drew Carey
Publisher: Hyperion
Published: 1997-09-17
Total Pages: 0
ISBN-13: 9780786863518
DOWNLOAD EBOOKThe star of ABC-TV's hit comedy The Drew Carey Show presents a collection of vignettes based on the people and places he encountered on the way to fame and speaks back to his show's critics.
Author: Drew Carey
Publisher:
Published: 1998
Total Pages: 277
ISBN-13: 9780733801921
DOWNLOAD EBOOKWe all know Drew Carey from his award-winning stand-up career and his hit television show, but do we really know Drew Carey, the person? In his first book, the bawdy and irreverent DIRTY JOKES AND BEER: STORIES OF THE UNREFINED, find out about all the many sides to this misunderstood Hollywood star.The Health-Conscious Drew:THEY SAY THAT EXERCISE AND PROPER DIET ARE THE KEYS TO A LONGER HEALTHIER LIFE. OH WELL... WATCH FOR MY NEXT BOOK, HOW I DIED WHILE JOGGING.Drew the Lover:I READ FROM "FORUM" LETTERS IN PENTHOUSE THINKING THAT I COULD LEARN FROM THEM. I REMEMBER THINKING SOMETIMES WHEN I WAS HAVING SEX, "LET'S SEE NOW. HOW DID 'SURPRISED IN CINCINNATI' DO IT?"... IF A PLAYBOY PLAYMATE SAID IN HER QUESTIONNAIRE THAT SHE LIKE A GUY IN TIGHT PANTS, I WOULD GO OUT AND BUY SOME TIGHT PANTS. IF SHE SAID SHE LIKE WELL-ENDOWED MEN WITH BIG MUSCLES AND HAIRY CHESTS, I WOULD CRY.And Drew's formula that took him from a lonely teenager to a successful mega-star:...AVOID CHEAP COLOGNE AND CHEESY BIKINI UNDERWEAR. DON'T EXPECT SEX ON THE FIRST DATE, AND NEVER PAY MORE THAN TWENTY DOLLARS FOR A LAP DANCE.Plus there's a "secret chapter" with punch lines like these: IT HAS CASTERS. IT VVOTES. HENRY AARON USED IT TO HIT HIS 750TH HOME RUN.We've let Drew Carey write this book entirely by himself, without the aid of a professional ghostwriter, even though Drew has never written a book before and was kicked out of college twice.
Author: Garrison Keillor
Publisher: Blackstone Publishing
Published: 2021-08-10
Total Pages:
ISBN-13:
DOWNLOAD EBOOKOver 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.
Author: Jackie Martling
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Published: 1998-10-07
Total Pages: 210
ISBN-13: 1439136912
DOWNLOAD EBOOKThe head writer for The Howard Stern Show lives "down" to his raunchy reputation with this hilarious collection of the very best jokes, stories, songs, and one-liners-from the naughty to the irreverent to the politically incorrect. Here are the gems from the private files from the man infamous for knowing every joke there ever was. In comedy clubs from coast to coast since 1979, “The Joke Man” has dared audiences to start a joke he couldn’t finish. Now he takes no prisoners, spares no ethnic or social group, and exhibits not one ounce of good taste in this wildly offensive, outrageously funny collection of dirty jokes.
Author: Emily Henry
Publisher: Penguin
Published: 2021-05-25
Total Pages: 354
ISBN-13: 0593336127
DOWNLOAD EBOOKTHE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER FROM THE #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF PEOPLE WE MEET ON VACATION! "Original, sparkling bright, and layered with feeling."--Sally Thorne, author of The Hating Game A romance writer who no longer believes in love and a literary writer stuck in a rut engage in a summer-long challenge that may just upend everything they believe about happily ever afters. Augustus Everett is an acclaimed author of literary fiction. January Andrews writes bestselling romance. When she pens a happily ever after, he kills off his entire cast. They're polar opposites. In fact, the only thing they have in common is that for the next three months, they're living in neighboring beach houses, broke, and bogged down with writer's block. Until, one hazy evening, one thing leads to another and they strike a deal designed to force them out of their creative ruts: Augustus will spend the summer writing something happy, and January will pen the next Great American Novel. She'll take him on field trips worthy of any rom-com montage, and he'll take her to interview surviving members of a backwoods death cult (obviously). Everyone will finish a book and no one will fall in love. Really.
Author: Tucker Max
Publisher: Citadel
Published: 2012-03-01
Total Pages: 537
ISBN-13: 0806535938
DOWNLOAD EBOOKThe “highly entertaining and thoroughly reprehensible” #1 New York Times bestseller—now with sixteen pages of photos and a new introduction (The New York Times). My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. --from the Introduction Actual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don’t believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I’ll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You’re an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you."
Author: Rudy A. Swale
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Published: 2008-05-28
Total Pages: 432
ISBN-13: 1569759456
DOWNLOAD EBOOKTHE BIGGEST, BADDEST, BADASSEST BOOK OF LEWD, CRUDE AND FUNNY-AS-$#!+ JOKES •What did the two lesbian frogs say to each other? We do taste like chicken! •What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive? Her ankles. •The journalist asked the politician, “Your assistant said publicly that you have a small penis. Would you like to comment? “Yes, I would,” said the politician. “The truth is my assistant has a big mouth.” •A guy walks in on his wife having sex with another man and says, “what the hell are you two doing?” His wife turns to her lover and says, “I told you he was stupid.” •How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an altar boy. If you think no joke is too raw as long as it’s funny—this is the book for you! This massive collection of laugh-out-loud and totally politically incorrect jokes is sure to have you and your friends rolling in hysterics.
Author: Mad Comedy
Publisher:
Published: 2020-06-23
Total Pages: 244
ISBN-13:
DOWNLOAD EBOOKEvery family has a dirty uncle. In my family, it was Uncle Dan. Pour a couple beers in him, and he'd start telling inappropriate jokes in front of the whole disapproving family. "A girl only has one heart, so playing with her heart is wrong," Uncle Dan advised. "Play with her boobs instead -- she's got two of those." "I'm feeling a bit depressed today: I just noticed I've got a gray pubic hair," he said. "I didn't freak out too much when I found it, but the people in the elevator with me looked horrified." Uncle Dan shook his head sadly and said, "Some people say there are no rules when it comes to love. Unfortunately for me, the judge disagreed." "They say one in every four men is gay, so there must be one in my group of friends," Uncle Dan said as he swigged his beer. "I hope it's Michael - he's super cute." "My girlfriend recently became a world-famous porn star," Uncle Dan said proudly. "She's gonna be really angry when she finds out." "How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?" Uncle Dan asked my young cousin, who looked up, confused. "Only one," he said, "but it takes two paramedics to get it back out." This book contains years of Uncle Dan's cringey, pervy, inappropriate jokes that ruined many family Thanksgivings, birthday parties, summer barbecues, and Christmases. Don't say you weren't warned!
Author: various authors
Publisher: Editions Asap
Published:
Total Pages: 47
ISBN-13: 2359322966
DOWNLOAD EBOOKAuthor: Sid Finch
Publisher: Hachette UK
Published: 2015-11-12
Total Pages: 96
ISBN-13: 1783726741
DOWNLOAD EBOOKWhat do you call a cheap circumcision? A rip-off! Filled with more filth than three-week old underwear, this little collection of obscene one-liners, smutty shenanigans and graphic gags will have you blushing like a freshly spanked bottom and sniggering like a naughty school kid.
