A wiser and seasoned Smedes offers hope and direction for all those seeking to understand and practice forgiveness. With compassion, insight, and illuminating example, he explains the three stages of forgiveness, shows why we should forgive and whom we should forgive, explains how faith can help us find the strength to forgive, and demonstrates the steps we must take in order to forgive.
Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Nobel Peace Prize winner, Chair of The Elders, and Chair of South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, along with his daughter, the Reverend Mpho Tutu, offer a manual on the art of forgiveness—helping us to realize that we are all capable of healing and transformation. Tutu's role as the Chair of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission taught him much about forgiveness. If you asked anyone what they thought was going to happen to South Africa after apartheid, almost universally it was predicted that the country would be devastated by a comprehensive bloodbath. Yet, instead of revenge and retribution, this new nation chose to tread the difficult path of confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation. Each of us has a deep need to forgive and to be forgiven. After much reflection on the process of forgiveness, Tutu has seen that there are four important steps to healing: Admitting the wrong and acknowledging the harm; Telling one's story and witnessing the anguish; Asking for forgiveness and granting forgiveness; and renewing or releasing the relationship. Forgiveness is hard work. Sometimes it even feels like an impossible task. But it is only through walking this fourfold path that Tutu says we can free ourselves of the endless and unyielding cycle of pain and retribution. The Book of Forgiving is both a touchstone and a tool, offering Tutu's wise advice and showing the way to experience forgiveness. Ultimately, forgiving is the only means we have to heal ourselves and our aching world.
For all of us who have been wounded by another and struggled to understand and move beyond our feelings of hurt and anger, Lewis Smedes's classic book on forgiveness shows that it is possible to heal our pain and find room in our hearts to forgive. Breaking down the process of healing into four stages and offering stories of real people's experience throughout, this wise book provides hope and solace for all who long for the peace that comes with forgiveness.
The Templeton Foundation, whose board members include Desmond Tutu, Jimmy Carter, Robert Coles, and others, has already funded more than $5 million and supported 58 studies to show that it's possible to teach people to forgive faster, more thoroughly, and with longer-lasting results. The core of Everett Worthington's own research is his revolutionary five-step Reach program for forgiveness: R = Recall the hurt (define your feelings and expectations)E = Empathize with the one who hurt you (put yourself in the victimizer's shoes)A = Give the Altruistic gift of forgiveness (commit to a selfless act)C = Commit to forgive (make your act a public one)H = Hold onto forgiveness (learn how not to slide back into thoughts of revenge and retaliation)The author lays out the research results that demonstrate that people who forgive are healthier and happier. It offers a new definition of forgiveness: it's not an act of will, but rather a change in understanding.This revolutionary book provides readers with a new road out of the pain of victimization.
Winner of the Christianity Today Book Award in Christianity and Culture How should we remember atrocities? Should we ever forgive abusers? Can we not hope for final reconciliation, even if it means redeemed victims and perpetrators spending eternity together? We live in an age that insists that past wrongs—genocides, terrorist attacks, bald personal injustices—should never be forgotten. But Miroslav Volf here proposes the radical idea that letting go of such memories—after a certain point and under certain conditions—may actually be a gift of grace we should embrace. Volf’s personal stories of persecution and interrogation frame his search for theological resources to make memories a wellspring of healing rather than a source of deepening pain and animosity. Controversial, thoughtful, and incisively reasoned, The End of Memory begins a conversation that we avoid to our great detriment. This second edition includes an appendix on the memories of perpetrators as well as victims, a response to critics, and a James K. A. Smith interview with Volf about the nature and function of memory in the Christian life.
We are at our human best when we give and forgive. But we live in a world in which it makes little sense to do either one. In our increasingly graceless culture, where can we find the motivation to give? And how do we learn to forgive when forgiving seems counterintuitive or even futile? A deeply personal yet profoundly thoughtful book, Free of Charge explores these questions--and the further questions to which they give rise--in light of God's generosity and Christ's sacrifice for us. Miroslav Volf draws from popular culture as well as from a wealth of literary and theological sources, weaving his rich reflections around the sturdy frame of Paul's vision of God's grace and Martin Luther's interpretation of that vision. Blending the best of theology and spirituality, he encourages us to echo in our own lives God's generous giving and forgiving. A fresh examination of two practices at the heart of the Christian faith--giving and forgiving--the Archbishop of Canterbury's Lenten study book for 2006 is at the same time an introduction to Christianity. Even more, it is a compelling invitation to Christian faith as a way of life. "Miroslav Volf, one of the most celebrated theologians of our day, offers us a unique interweaving of intense reflection, vivid and painfully personal stories and sheer celebration of the giving God . . . I cannot remember having read a better account of what it means to say that Jesus suffered for us in our place." -- Dr. Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury
What if you could revolutionize your life from top to bottom by altering your mindset in just one way? Art costello has the answer and it's quite simple: mastering your expectations. Through improved understanding of expectations and their bearing on every facte of life, you can expect: -increased creativity and productivity -boosted confidence -improved human interaction -the ability to steer the course of your future! Costello speaks conversationally and candidly about his own experiences and how they inspired him to pioneer the original concepts in this book. He explains that expectations are not just a word, but a framework for living. When you operate through faith and not fear, you create higher expectations and create self-fulfilling prophesies for the life you have always wanted. It's simple but life changing!
Everyone knows that forgiveness is a virtue and a key to emotional, spiritual and even physical well-being. But learning how to actually forgive-or to accept forgiveness, as the case may be-is a sacred art few of us have mastered.
#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER You deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you. Have you ever felt stuck in a cycle of unresolved pain, playing offenses over and over in your mind? You know you can't go on like this, but you don't know what to do next. Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled through this journey. But in surprising ways, she’s discovered how to let go of bound-up resentment and overcome the resistance to forgiving people who aren’t willing to make things right. With deep empathy, therapeutic insight, and rich Bible teaching coming out of more than 1,000 hours of theological study, Lysa will help you: Learn how to move on when the other person refuses to change and never says they're sorry. Walk through a step-by-step process to free yourself from the hurt of your past and feel less offended today. Discover what the Bible really says about forgiveness and the peace that comes from living it out right now. Identify what's stealing trust and vulnerability from your relationships so you can believe there is still good ahead. Disempower the triggers hijacking your emotions by embracing the two necessary parts of forgiveness. Look for additional biblically based resources and devotionals from Lysa: Good Boundaries and Goodbyes It's Not Supposed to Be This Way Uninvited You're Going to Make It Embraced Seeing Beautiful Again
There is a need in both public and professional sectors for a deeper, and more complete understanding of forgiveness, as we are - in the author's own words - "on the threshold of an age of forgiveness and reconciliation." And yet despite continued interest and development in the field, researchers, clinicians, practitioners, and academics have long been without a comprehensive resource on which to base their work. The Handbook of Forgiveness summarizes the state of the science in the research, practice, and teaching of forgiveness. Chapters approach forgiveness and reconciliation from a variety of perspectives, drawing on related work in fields such as biology, personality, social psychology, clinical psychology, developmental psychology, philosophy, neuroscience, and international/political implications. The Handbook provides comprehensive treatments of the topic, integrating theoretical considerations, methodological discussions, and practical interventions strategies in order to appeal to researchers, clinicians, and practitioners. This volume is the most up-to-date and authoritative resource on the understanding of the science of forgiveness. The Handbook of Forgiveness has been chosen as a Book of Distinction by Templeton Press.
