What would you do if both parents were diagnosed with Alzheimer's?At the time of their diagnosis, Ed Church struggles to his feet, yelling, "How dare you use the A. word with me," while Ibby wags her finger at the doctor scolding, "Shame on you."They protect each other, Ibby by asserting, "We're not leaving our home," and Ed reassuring, "We're just fine."About his driving Ed defends, "I'm an excellent driver, I've never had an accident." When their daughter, Rosie, finds dings in Ed's car, he dismisses, "Someone must have bumped into me."After Rosie moves them to assisted living, convinced they are on a second honeymoon, they break the news, "We've decided not to have more children."In the late stages, they politely shake Rosie's hand, inquiring, "Now, who are you?"In ALZHEIMER'S DAUGHTER readers journey with Rosie Church from her first suspicions that something is awry to nearly a decade later as she is honored to hold Ed and Ibby's hands when they draw their final breaths.
It is painfully difficult to watch a loved one decline as dementia ravages their mind, destroying memories, rational thinking, and judgment. In her touching memoir, I Will Never Forget, Elaine Pereira shares the heartbreaking and humorous story of her mother’s incredible journey through dementia. Pereira begins with entertaining glimpses into her own childhood and feisty teenage years, demonstrating her mother’s strength of character. Years later, as Betty Ward started to exhibit bizarre behaviors and paranoia, Pereira was mystified by her mom’s amazing ability to mask the truth. Not until a revealing incident over an innocuous drapery rod did Pereira recognize the extent of her mother’s Alzheimer’s. As their roles shifted and a new paradigm emerged, Pereira transformed into a caregiver blindly navigating dementia’s unpredictable haze. But before Betty’s passing, she orchestrated a stunning rally to control her own destiny via a masterful, Houdini-like escape. I Will Never Forget is a powerful heartwarming story that helps others know that they are not alone in their journey. “Poignant, shocking, and honest … far more than just words on paper. If you or someone you know is living through the hell of dementia, you need this book!” —Ionia Martin, developer of Readful Things Reviews and Alzheimer’s caregiver
One in 8 people over age 65 has Alzheimer's disease, and nearly fifty percent of those over age 85. With the passion of a committed daughter and the fervor of a tireless reporter, Martha Stettinius weaves a compelling story of her long journey caregiving for her demented mother with a broad exploration of the causes of dementia, means of treating it, and hopes for preventing it. Her greatest gift to readers is that of optimism that caregiving can deepen love, that dementia can be fought, and that families can be strengthened. Her book is appealing, enlightening, and inspiring. Includes appendices on dementia research; source notes; resources for caregivers; and an index.
"Imagine the heart-wrenching devastation that is experienced by a family when a parent is diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease! Author Diane Currie shares her candid and personal reflections about her mother's struggle with this disease as she copes with the reality of the present but always honors the memory of her past. Through a series of moving vignettes, she remains connected with her mother in a creative way as the strong bond between them slowly dissolves as the disease progresses. From the first moment of her mother's diagnosis, Currie conveys in a captivating manner the intense feelings of loss and hopelessness one experiences when dealing with this dreadful disease. She is able to protray the subtle changes in her mother's behavior and personality throughout her decline, all in a deeply human way. While Before My Eyes describes one family's touching and painful journey, in essence Currie's reflective account may typify the Alzheimer's experience, while offering support and validation to all those who walk its arduous path"--Page 4 of cover.
Mary Ellen Geist decided to leave her job as a CBS Radio anchor to return home to Michigan when her father's Alzheimer's got to be too much for her mother to shoulder alone. She chose to live her life by a different set of priorities: to be guided by her heart, not by outside accomplishment and recognition. The New York Times wrote a front page story on Mary Ellen on Thanksgiving 2005. It was one of the most e-mailed stories for the month. Through her own story and through interviews with doctors and other women who've followed the "Daughter Track"--leaving a job to care for an aging parent--Geist offers emotional insights on how to encourage interaction with the loved one you're caring for; how to determine daily tasks that are achievable and rewarding; how the personality of the patient affects the caregiving and the progression of the diseases; as well as invaluable advice about how caregivers can take care of themselves while accomplishing the Herculean task of constantly caring for others. Geist's years in journalism allow her to report on Boomers' caretaking dilemmas with professional objectivity, and her warm voice brings compassion and insight to one of the most difficult stituations a son or daughter may face during his or her life.
Just before World War II, “Lil” escaped a miserable marriage in Cleveland, Ohio, took back her maiden name, left her young daughter Elinor behind, and launched what became an international business career. Rejoining Lil at the age of ten, Elinor watched as her mother gave fabulous parties, sold automotive parts in South America, Asia, and the Middle East, and “in any given room, took up all the air there was.” With her stunning looks, high intelligence, and drive for adventure, Lil was more a figure to admire than a mother to love. Making an Exit is the account of what happened after Lil was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. As the disease progresses, Elinor becomes her mother’s mother, caring for her with growing compassion. Lil changes, too: filled with new warmth, the word “love” now regularly crosses her lips. And despite the disintegration of Lil’s mind and language, mother and daughter make a surprising new start. “In this moving memoir of mother-daughter love only strengthened by Alzheimer’s, Elinor Fuchs brilliantly pulls off the nearly impossible feat of reproducing on the page the living voice of dementia, a masterly achievement.” — Alix Kates Shulman, author of A Good Enough Daughter and To Love What Is “How many dementia caregivers find themselves laughing and crying at the same time? This is the book for us. Making an Exit is Elinor Fuchs's sparkling gift basket to those who help, or may someday help, someone with severe cognitive impairment. A theater professor and drama critic, Fuchs describes the strange, heroic ten-year ‘Emergency’ of caring for her single mom, Lil-- a glamorously eccentric businesswoman--with irrepressible vitality, generosity, forthrightness, and love.” —Margaret Morganroth Gullette, author of Aged by Culture and Agewise “Unflinchingly honest, open-hearted, and funny, this is a work of passionate intelligence and deep humanity.” — Joyce Antler, author of The Journey Home: How Jewish Women Shaped Modern America and You Never Call, You Never Write! A History of the Jewish Mother “Fuchs celebrates the richness and folly of life and language in this loving and often funny tribute to her nonconformist mother... Never mawkish, this is a tender tale of an idiosyncratic, independent woman and her daughter’s reluctant love.” — Publishers Weekly “This book was a joy to read. It felt as if I were reading a well-written script, part drama and part comedy” — Daniel Kuhn, American Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease and Other Dementias “Making an Exit makes you cry and laugh and think. It takes you into deep disturbances of memory and history and brings you back with compassion and love. No other memoir of dementia combines the trials of caregiving and the painful, yet necessary growth of self knowledge.” — Thomas R. Cole, author of The Journey of Life: A Cultural History of Aging in America “In Making an Exit Elinor Fuchs leaves readers with an understanding of growing older in America today, where filial generosity, enduring resilience, heartfelt ambivalence, and undiminished humor shine through the most vulnerable experiences of decline.” —Stephen Katz, author of Cultural Aging: Life Course, Lifestyle, and Senior Worlds and Professor of Sociology, Trent University, Canada “For millions of sufferers and their families, Alzheimer’s is a bleak and arduous experience. Yet Fuchs’s unsentimental and often wry memoir should help them by showing that though there are certainly dark and precipitous times near the end, a life examined with totality and compassion can make that eventual end an experience not only of tragedy but dignified fulfillment.” — Michael Standaert, Los Angeles Times “Making an Exit is a rare and wonderful rollercoaster of a book, tender and touching, hilarious and high-spirited - a moving portrait of a daughter and mother that is fiercely intelligent, ineffably sad, and, finally, transcendent.” — Kathleen Woodward, author of Aging and its Discontents “Fuchs’s mother is larger than life in both her salad days and in her days of word salad. Making an Exit overflows with life — its sorrows and surprises, its follies and joys.” — Anne Basting, author of Forget Memory and editor of Playing Penelope: An Arts-Based Odyssey to Change Long-Term Care “Tremendous... A book filled with unexpected glimmers of hope, wisdom, and joy... Fuchs possesses a delightfully wicked sense of humor and a sharp eye for the quirky detail. Fuchs [employs] a deft and efficient prose style, one akin to Augusten Burroughs, David Sedaris, and Anne Lamott.” — Greg Changnon, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution “Elinor’s mother Lil is a larger than life character who needs her daughter’s help to make an exit from life’s stage. While Elinor is burdened by her mother’s dementia, she is also uplifted by its possibilities for a late-blooming relationship. Dementia is ripe for social reconstruction, and Fuchs gives us hope with stories that reframe the challenge of cognitive loss in terms of loving relationship. Read this book, find deep humanity, and enrich yours.” — Peter Whitehouse, M.D., author of The Myth of Alzheimer’s and Professor of Neurology, Case Western Reserve University
Gentle narration and easy-to-understand explanations follow Daniel and his family as they experience the gradual, debilitating effects of his grandfather's Alzheimer's Disease. Simultaneous.
When her mother, Rosa, begins to show signs of dementia, Caterina Edwards embarks on what turns out to be a search for the meaning of the past and of home. During the four years she cares for her mother, Edwards must navigate between conflicting responsibilities while dealing with her mother's troubled mind and her own exhaustion. This frank memoir tells a complex story of two women in crisis, one struggling to maintain a sense of self, the other seeking to understand and accept both her past and her present.
With the heartfelt prose of a loving daughter, Patti Davis provides a life raft for the caregivers of Alzheimer’s patients. “For the decade of my father’s illness, I felt as if I was floating in the deep end, tossed by waves, carried by currents, but not drowning,” writes Patti Davis in this searingly honest and deeply moving account of the challenges involved in taking care of someone stricken with Alzheimer’s. When her father, the fortieth president of the United States, announced his Alzheimer’s diagnosis in an address to the American public in 1994, the world had not yet begun speaking about this cruel, mysterious disease. Yet overnight, Ronald Reagan and his immediate family became the face of Alzheimer’s, and Davis, once content to keep her family at arm’s length, quickly moved across the country to be present during “the journey that would take [him] into the sunset of [his] life.” Empowered by all she learned from caring for her father—about the nature of the illness, but also about the loss of a parent—Davis founded a support group for the family members and friends of Alzheimer’s patients. Along with a medically trained cofacilitator, she met with hundreds of exhausted and devastated attendees to talk through their pain and confusion. While Davis was aware that her own circumstances were uniquely fortunate, she knew there were universal truths about dementia, and even surprising gifts to be found in a long goodbye. With Floating in the Deep End, Davis draws on a welter of experiences to provide a singular account of battling Alzheimer’s. Eloquently woven with personal anecdotes and helpful advice tailored specifically for the overlooked caregiver, this essential guide covers every potential stage of the disease from the initial diagnosis through the ultimate passing and beyond. Including such tips as how to keep a loved one hygienic, and careful responses for when they drift to a time gone by, Davis always stresses the emotional milestones that come with slow-burning grief. Along the way, Davis shares how her own fractured family came together. With unflinching candor, she recalls when her mother, Nancy, who for decades could not show her children compassion or vulnerability, suddenly broke down in her arms. Davis also offers tender moments in which her father, a fabled movie star whom she always longed to know better, revealed his true self—always kind, even when he couldn’t recognize his own daughter. An inherently wise work that promises to become a classic, Floating in the Deep End ultimately provides hope to struggling families while elegantly illuminating the fragile human condition.
