2. What is a Sex and Love Addiction? Definition of Addiction, The High, Tolerance, Dependence, Craving, Withdrawal, Obsession, Compulsion, Secrecy, Personality Change, Getting It All Together: Diagnostic Criteria. 3. The Disease Concept of Addictions: Competing Theories of Addictions, The Disease Model of Addiction, The Disease of Sex and Love Addiction, Severity of Sex and Love Addictions. 4. Short-Term Treatment and Recovery: Twelve-Step Programs - H.O.W., Bottom Lines and Triggers, Secrecy, Why Me?, Masks and Attitudes, Relapse and Relapse Prevention. 5. Long-Term Treatment and Recovery: Self-Affirmation, Support Systems, Families, Boundaries, Nurturing and Discipline, PTSD, Healthy Intimacy.
In Love and Addiction, published 40 years ago and sold as a mass-market paperback on love, Stanton Peele and Archie Brodsky laid out every major issue confronting the addiction field today. This pioneering classic, which was excerpted in Cosmopolitan and spawned the codependence movement, is the first-and still the definitive-book on addictive love. But it is much more than that; it is the book that explains why addiction is not what we think it is. Love and Addiction focuses on dependent love relationships to explore what both love and addiction really are-psychologically, socially, and culturally. Addiction is an overgrown, dependent, destructive relationship. Love is the opposite, a sharing, growth-inspiring one. The authors' analysis makes clear that an addiction is an experience that takes on meaning and power in light of a person's needs, desires, beliefs, expectations, and fears. By showing how addiction grows out of ordinary human experience, Peele and Brodsky offer a liberating understanding of all addictions-to alcohol, drugs, tobacco, food, gambling, shopping, electronic media, sex, or love. In 1975, Love and Addiction boldly proposed ideas whose truth is only now being recognized: Addiction is not limited to drugs, and drugs are not necessarily addictive. AA's 12 steps are not the last word in addiction treatment. On the contrary, practically oriented addiction treatments are more effective. The goal of addiction treatment and recovery is not abstinence to the exclusion of all else, but to build a life that rules out addiction. Love is the opposite of the self-protective constriction of addiction; it is the expansion of your spirit with another human being. Remarkably, all of these issues-the widespread application of the addiction diagnosis, the limited value of AA and its disease theory, the possibility that people can continue using but still eliminate addiction (harm reduction)-are as hotly debated today as when Peele and Brodsky first analyzed addiction forty years ago. Most remarkably of all, the answers Peele and Brodsky arrived at in Love and Addiction are only now being embraced by progressive thinkers in the field. "Destined to become a classic " Psychology Today proclaimed in 1975. Rereading Love and Addiction 35 years later, addiction researcher Rowdy Yates wrote that the book "still reads absolutely true as an understanding of addictive behavior." Reading today this clairvoyant analysis of the most challenging issues we face in the twenty-first century-the meaning of love and the cure for addiction-you will recognize both the current relevance and enduring value of Love and Addiction, now reissued with a new (2015) Authors' Preface, the Authors' Preface written for the 1991 paperback reissue, and a brief new introduction to each chapter. Otherwise, nothing has been changed in the original book.
Addicted to Love is a roadmap to recovery and healthy relationships for female sex and love addicts. It’s hard to imagine love without the pain. Women who live with love addiction are a unique breed having learned to cope in a sex-driven world by finding their worth in sexuality and being wanted. The human need for lasting, meaningful relationships is constantly sabotaged by these women’s own behaviors on top of events outside their control. In Addicted to Love, Lacy A. Bentley—a woman who has been there—introduces her own recovery journey with courageous honesty to guide other women on their paths to recovery. Each chapter focuses on a different trait of emotional health and teaches women to integrate that trait in a workbook-style format. Lacy shows them how to secure their romantic heart, love like they were meant to, and break free from compulsive patterns, while presenting new ways of seeing day-to-day patterns. Every word guides brave women into the relationships they truly want and deserve—without excuses, compulsions, or addiction in the recovery roadmap of the future.
Love addiction manifests in many forms, from Fatal Attraction-type obsessive lust to less extreme but nonetheless psychologically and emotionally harmful forms. The most common of these is staying in a bad relationship because of a fear of being alone-the "I hate you but don't leave me" relationship. In ADDICTION TO LOVE, recovering love addict Susan Peabody explains the variety of ways this disorder plays out, from the obsessively doting love addict to the addict who can't disentangle from an unfulfilling, dead-end relationship. Peabody provides an in-depth and easy-to-follow recovery program for those suffering from this unhealthy and often dangerous addiction and explains how to create a loving, safe, and fulfilling relationship. • A seminal work on unhealthy and obsessive behaviors in love, and how to change behavior to have a positive relationship. This third edition includes a new introduction and revisions to the text throughout. • Some symptoms of love addiction include love at first sight, excessive fantasizing, abnormal jealousy, nagging, and accepting dishonesty. • Even relationships with parents, children, siblings, or friends may be addictive-dependency is not always related to romantic love. • Previous editions have sold more than 40,000 copies. "Love addiction is a three-headed serpent that Susan Peabody adeptly slays. This is the quintessential book for any love addict or counselor needing to fully understand this highly prevalent and complex disorder. Susan detects and dissects aspects of this condition not comprehended in other books of its kind. Recovery is possible. This book makes it possible to take the succinct steps necessary toward a loving and reciprocal long-term intimate relationship." —Sudi Scull, M.F.T., C.N., psychotherapist and nutritionist
Like other psychiatric disorders, sexual addiction is a condition that affects peoples' relationships with others as much as it affects their own mental state. Individuals suffering from sexual addiction typically pursue sex through any means possible and often engage in risky forms of sexual activity such as exhibitionism, promiscuous sex with multiple partners, online sex, etc. It's easy to see how a couple's relationship may be challenged by the manifestations and reality of a disorder like this one. A Couple's Guide to Sexual Addiction discusses common relationship issues within the context of sexual addiction and provides the reader with exercises, information, and advice on the following topics: Trust Communication Healthy sexuality & sexual behaviors Family By understanding the reality of sexual addiction and what it means for a relationship, couples will be able to better relate to each other and plan for a successful future.
"Addiction can wreak havoc on relationships, destroying trust and damaging bonds with family, friends, and colleagues. Substance use both causes these interpersonal problems and becomes a method of trying to cope with them. Psychologist and addictions expert Kelly Green has learned through working with hundreds of clients that maintaining healthy relationships is key to the recovery process. In this compassionate, judgment-free guide, Dr. Green shares powerful tools for setting and maintaining boundaries, communicating feelings and needs, ending harmful relationships respectfully, and reestablishing emotional intimacy. With inspiring narratives, downloadable self-assessment worksheets, and exercises, this book lights the way to a life untethered from addiction--and filled with positive connections"--
A good relationship is supposed to feel loving, happy and safe. Recovering addicts have often experienced intimate relationships that were distorted in major ways by their addiction. In recovery from addiction a new world opens up-one in which love is no longer fraught with conflict, drama, fear and disappointment. A recovering addict often feels frightened at the prospect of looking for a new relationship or repairing an existing one. But the fact is that all the necessary tools, skills and strengths that were gained in recovery can be adapted to this new area. Assuming you have done a lot of the internal work of addiction recovery, you are now ready to go out into the world in order to find a more rewarding and lasting relationship. Here you will find some simple ways to plan and think about the challenges that you will face and the decisions you will need to make. Why not enjoy the fruits of recovery to the fullest?
Recovering addicts are faced with many challenges, and these challenges can often extend to their romantic partners. During the recovery period, couples often struggle with overcoming feelings of betrayal and frustration, and may have a hard time rebuilding trust and closeness. While there are many resources available to recovering addicts, there are limited resources for the people who love them. In Loving Someone in Recovery, therapist Beverly Berg offers powerful tools for the partners of recovering addicts. Based in mindfulness, attachment theory, and neurobiology, this book will help readers sustain emotional stability in their relationships, increase effective communication, establish boundaries, and take real steps toward reigniting intimacy. The material in this book is drawn from the author’s successful Conscious Couples Recovery Workshop. With more than 25 years in the field, she has developed a unique set of exercises that address the issues faced by couples in recovery. This book addresses the roles that both partners play in recovery, and aims to help readers develop a new appreciation for one another and improve self-confidence and acceptance. The road to recovery is never an easy one, but by building a strong support system, the chances of success are exponentially greater. For more information on Berg’s work, visit consciouscouplesrecovery.com
A brilliant new guide to understanding the origins of codependence and the path to recovery by a nationally recognized authority on dependency and addiction. In this fresh new look at codependence, Pia Mellody traces the origins of this illness back to childhood, describing a whole range of emotional, spiritual, intellectual, physical, and sexual abuses. Because of these earlier experiences, codependent adults often lack the skills necessary to lead mature lives and have satisfying relationships. Recovery from codependence comes from clearing up the toxic feelings left over from childhood and learning to reparent oneself by intervening on the adult symptoms of codependence. Central to Mellody's concept is the idea of the "precious child" that needs healing within each adult. She creates a framework for identifying codependent behavior and describes an effective approach to recovery that includes both therapy and self-help processes. Designed to be used with her new workbook for codependents, Breaking Free, this is a powerful tool for understanding the nature of codependence.
