No Country for Old Gnomes

No Country for Old Gnomes

Author: Kevin Hearne

Publisher: Del Rey

Published: 2019-04-16

Total Pages: 435

ISBN-13: 1524797782

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Go big or go gnome. The New York Times bestselling authors of Kill the Farm Boy welcome you to the world of Pell, the irreverent fantasy universe that recalls Monty Python and Terry Pratchett. “A complete delight, as fluffy and fun as The Lego Movie and as heartfelt as Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.”—Locus War is coming, and it’s gonna be Pell. On one side stand the gnomes: smol, cheerful, possessing tidy cardigans and no taste for cruelty. On the other side sit the halflings, proudly astride their war alpacas, carrying bags of grenades and hungry for a fight. And pretty much anything else. It takes only one halfling bomb and Offi Numminen’s world is turned upside down—or downside up, really, since he lives in a hole in the ground. His goth cardigans and aggressive melancholy set him apart from the other gnomes, as does his decision to fight back against their halfling oppressors. Suddenly Offi is the leader of a band of lovable misfits and outcasts—from a gryphon who would literally kill for omelets to a young dwarf herbalist who is better with bees than with his cudgel to an assertive and cheerful teen witch with a beard as long as her book of curses—all on a journey to the Toot Towers to confront the dastardly villain intent on tearing Pell asunder. These adventurers never fit in anywhere else, but as they become friends, fight mermaids, and get really angry at this one raccoon, they learn that there’s nothing more heroic than being yourself. In No Country for Old Gnomes, Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Hearne lovingly tweak the tropes of fantasy and fairy tales. Here you’ll find goofy jokes and whimsical puns, but you’ll also find a diverse, feminist, and lighthearted approach to fantasy that will bring a smile to your face and many fine cheeses to your plate.


I'm a Gnome!

I'm a Gnome!

Author: Jessica Peill-Meininghaus

Publisher: Crown Books for Young Readers

Published: 2019-08-13

Total Pages: 21

ISBN-13: 1524719862

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Fans of Mo Willems and Dev Petty's I Don't Want to Be a Frog will love this humorous tale about one gnome's journey to prove he is unlike the other magical creatures in the forest. Join Gnome (that's spelled G-N-O-M-E--don't ask why the G is silent!) as he travels through the magical forest to attend the annual Gnome Festival. Along the way he encounters elves, dwarves, trolls, and fairies. But don't be mistaken. He is NOTHING like those magical creatures. Well, maybe he is . . . but only a little bit! When Gnome finally arrives at the festival, he realizes that all the traits he thought made gnomes different from the others actually made them alike--and that's just fine.


Quilted Gnomes for Your Home

Quilted Gnomes for Your Home

Author: , Annie's

Publisher: Annie's Wholesale

Published: 2021-12-03

Total Pages: 140

ISBN-13: 1640254722

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Bring some good luck along with a little bit of whimsy to your home or that of a loved one with these fun projects featuring gnomes. Find playful designs for all rooms of the house including projects for the kitchen, sewing room, holidays, or a special gift.


The Fairy Tale Art of John Bauer

The Fairy Tale Art of John Bauer

Author: John Bauer

Publisher: Redcrest Publishing

Published: 2018-04-13

Total Pages: 82

ISBN-13: 9781999667702

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Born in 1882 John Albert Bauer was a Swedish painter and illustrator. He studied at the Royal Swedish Academy of Arts and in 1904 he illustrated his first book, 'Lappland'. He is best known for his illustrations in early editions of 'Bland tomtar och troll' (Among Gnomes and Trolls), featuring stories of Swedish folklore and fairy tales. Bauer's troll illustrations were of a grotesque style but with a touch of humour, appealing to both children and adults alike. Most of his works are watercolours usually in muted colours over pen and ink line work. This enchanting compilation features 83 of Bauer's best works mostly from various editions of 'Bland tomtar och troll'. This superb collection is certain to delight lovers of fairy tale illustration and also Bauer admirers.


Kill the Farm Boy

Kill the Farm Boy

Author: Kevin Hearne

Publisher: Del Rey

Published: 2018-07-17

Total Pages: 411

ISBN-13: 1524797758

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In an irreverent series in the tradition of Monty Python, the bestselling authors of the Iron Druid Chronicles and Star Wars: Phasma reinvent fantasy, fairy tales, and floridly written feast scenes. “Ranks among the best of Christopher Moore and Terry Pratchett.”—Chuck Wendig “When you put two authors of this high caliber together, expect fireworks. Or at least laughs. What a hoot!”—Terry Brooks Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom, a hero, the Chosen One, was born . . . and so begins every fairy tale ever told. This is not that fairy tale. There is a Chosen One, but he is unlike any One who has ever been Chosened. And there is a faraway kingdom, but you have never been to a magical world quite like the land of Pell. There, a plucky farm boy will find more than he’s bargained for on his quest to awaken the sleeping princess in her cursed tower. First there’s the Dark Lord, who wishes for the boy’s untimely death . . . and also very fine cheese. Then there’s a bard without a song in her heart but with a very adorable and fuzzy tail, an assassin who fears not the night but is terrified of chickens, and a mighty fighter more frightened of her sword than of her chain-mail bikini. This journey will lead to sinister umlauts, a trash-talking goat, the Dread Necromancer Steve, and a strange and wondrous journey to the most peculiar “happily ever after” that ever once-upon-a-timed. Praise for Kill the Farm Boy “A rollicking fantasy adventure that upends numerous genre tropes in audacious style . . . a laugh-out-loud-funny fusion of Monty Python–esque humor and whimsy à la Terry Pratchett’s Discworld.”—Kirkus Reviews “Dawson and Hearne’s reimagining of a traditional fairy tale is reminiscent of William Goldman’s The Princess Bride and William Steig’s Shrek! Irreverent, funny, and full of entertaining wordplay, this will keep readers guessing until the end.”—Library Journal “Will have you laughing out loud until strangers begin to look at you oddly.”—SyFy “A smart comedy . . . nuanced, complicated, and human.”—Tordotcom “[Delilah Dawson and Kevin Hearne] make fun of the typical ‘white male power fantasies,’ and in that, they succeed, with their heroes all characters of color and/or falling somewhere under the LGBTQ umbrella.”—Publishers Weekly


The Zombie Gnome Defense Guide

The Zombie Gnome Defense Guide

Author: Shaenon K. Garrity

Publisher: Running Press Adult

Published: 2018-08-28

Total Pages: 160

ISBN-13: 076249154X

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Compiled from the notes of three zombie gnome experts (among them a Van Helsing-like zombie gnome hunter, a horticulture student, and a gardening columnist), this guide includes a detailed study of zombie gnome habits, hiding places, and offensive tactics, as well as an intimate history of the zombie gnome rise and eventual war with humanity. Empty-eyed, shambling, and hungry for human ankles, the zombie gnome population is on the rise, infesting the backyards of suburbia and attacking innocent lawn ornaments everywhere. While chances of human survival are minimal, readers can arm themselves with The Zombie Gnome Defense Guide to combat their tiny, undead enemies. Offering strategies for defense against a zombie gnome invasion, the book provides an extensive list of essential weapons and DIY home-fortification tips. Rare illustrations of zombie gnomes in their natural habitat and a priceless collection of never-before-seen photos (housed in an envelope in the back of the book) make this the go-to guide for survivalists in a zombie gnome-infested world.


Whill of Agora

Whill of Agora

Author: Michael James Ploof

Publisher: CreateSpace

Published: 2012-05

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781466249684

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Every so often, an epic adventure emerges that makes the blood surge, the spine tingle, and the heart smile page after exhilarating page. Such is Whill of Agora, Michael James Ploof's action-packed fantasy that visits strange new lands as it unveils how one exceptional young man named Whill makes full use of fierce wits, superior skills, and relentless will to help defend the land of Agora from the monstrous Draggard. With plenty of drama and action packed battle scenes, Whill of Agora will enthrall anyone on the quest for great adventure, good times, and an infectiously optimistic outlook on even the darkest and most dangerous of days. It is the year 5170 in the land Agora, where humans, dwarves, and elves have existed in peace for centuries. Now, however, the human King Addakon has invaded and waged war on neighboring Isladon. The once peaceful Kingdoms of Agora are on the brink of continental war. The Dark Elf Eadon, Addakon's master, and his army of Dragon-Elf crossbreeds, the Draggard, threaten to conquer all kingdoms. The final hour has arrived. Enter young Whill, a nineteen-year-old ranger with battle savvy and untapped abilities. Having spent years roaming Agora and training with his mentor Abram, Whill has become a bright intellectual and a master of combat. What he seeks most, however, is the identity of his birth parents. Instead, he finds a tumultuous terrain and a prophecy placing him in the center of the struggle. Along the way, Whill encounters an equally inspired group of companions that are matched in skill and mission. These include Rhunis the Dragon Slayer, the young Tarren, the fearless Dwarf Roakore, the beguiling warrior Elf Avriel, and the powerful Zerafin. As Whill joins forces, he forges bonds far mightier than their escalating travails. With high adventure and fierce friendship, Whill of Agora will capture your imagination and grip your heart during every super-charged escapade that Agora's bold and grinning brotherhood embraces.


The Gnome Project

The Gnome Project

Author: Jessica Peill-Meininghaus

Publisher: National Geographic Books

Published: 2015-05-05

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 1581572867

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What do you do when life is too chaotic? How about felting a gnome? Or 365 of them, one for each day of the year. Artist and wool crafter Jessica Peill-Meininghaus decided that she needed a project to teach herself follow-through in life. She settled on making one of her popular felted-wool gnomes every day for a year. With pipe cleaners and wool roving, amidst the chaos of raising four children and moving cross-country, Peill-Meininghaus felted her way through hundreds of charming, pointy-hatted, often bearded characters. Lavishly decorated with photos of each charming creation, The Gnome Project is the surprising and magical story of what happens when we commit to something small. (Hint: It's something very big, as in making life more meaningful.) Here is her inspirational tale, complete with gnome-making instructions.


The House in the Cerulean Sea

The House in the Cerulean Sea

Author: TJ Klune

Publisher: Tor Books

Published: 2020-03-17

Total Pages: 338

ISBN-13: 1250217326

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A NEW YORK TIMES, USA TODAY, and WASHINGTON POST BESTSELLER! A 2021 Alex Award winner! The 2021 RUSA Reading List: Fantasy Winner! An Indie Next Pick! One of Publishers Weekly's "Most Anticipated Books of Spring 2020" One of Book Riot’s “20 Must-Read Feel-Good Fantasies” Lambda Literary Award-winning author TJ Klune’s bestselling, breakout contemporary fantasy that's "1984 meets The Umbrella Academy with a pinch of Douglas Adams thrown in." (Gail Carriger) Linus Baker is a by-the-book case worker in the Department in Charge of Magical Youth. He's tasked with determining whether six dangerous magical children are likely to bring about the end of the world. Arthur Parnassus is the master of the orphanage. He would do anything to keep the children safe, even if it means the world will burn. And his secrets will come to light. The House in the Cerulean Sea is an enchanting love story, masterfully told, about the profound experience of discovering an unlikely family in an unexpected place—and realizing that family is yours. "1984 meets The Umbrella Academy with a pinch of Douglas Adams thrown in." —Gail Carriger, New York Times bestselling author of Soulless At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.


Garden Gnomes Have Issues

Garden Gnomes Have Issues

Author: Greg Stones

Publisher: Chronicle Books

Published: 2016-03-15

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781452144757

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Garden gnomes may be small, but their problems are often very big. They have issues with snowmen, magnets, bubblegum, and mimes. They really enjoy romance, skinny-dipping, and paper airplanes, but they have major issues with watermelons, mousetraps, trampolines, and teddy bears—and through it all they especially love one special thing. Artist Greg Stones turns his popular, playful illustration style to the tiny troubles of these beloved characters, presenting their inner lives with a warm and witty sense of the absurd.