The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.
We know you want to go out and pretend things are normal, but they aren't. Read this little missive as a daily reminder that things aren't normal right now, but that if you're careful, you will be around when they are normal again. Stay The Fuck At Home is funny without being preachy and puts a unique spin on social distancing. Read it to your kids, they mine as well hear all of the dirty words from you than anyone else. Be safe, be well, let's kick Corona Virus in the butt. See you on the flip flop.
When a global crisis has got you down, brighten your day with a sh*tload of color! Save humanity and your sanity by coloring through a collection of incredible works of art. When you’re tempted to come into contact with other humans, rewash your hands, retreat to your creativity cave, and color the sh*t out of these illustrations instead! Enjoy the tranquility of staying six feet away from loved ones while getting up close and personal with your imagination. Let your social distancing shine and channel your inner introvert with Stay the F*ck Home and Color! · Flatten the curve and boost your mood with more than 35 soothing illustrations · Sanitize your colored pencils and gel pens and get your coloring on! · Do your part and comingle with nobody but art!
It turns out that two is a million more kids than one. Adam Mansbach famously gave voice to two of parenting's primal struggles in Go the Fuck to Sleep and You Have to Fucking Eat. Now Fuck, Now There Are Two of You tackles a new addition to the family and all the fears and frustrations attendant to the simple, math-defying fact that two is a million more kids than one. As you probably know by now, you shouldn't read it to a child.
From the author of the international best seller GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP comes a book about the other great parental frustration: getting your little angel to eat something that even vaguely resembles a normal meal. Profane, loving and deeply cathartic, You Have to Fucking Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving mums and dads new, old, grand- and expectant a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem. You probably shouldn't read it to your children.
From the New York Times bestselling author of A Million Little Pieces and Bright Shiny Morning comes Katerina, James Frey’s highly anticipated new novel set in 1992 Paris and contemporary Los Angeles. A kiss, a touch. A smile and a beating heart. Love and sex and dreams, art and drugs and the madness of youth. Betrayal and heartbreak, regret and pain, the melancholy of age. Katerina, the explosive new novel by America’s most controversial writer, is a sweeping love story alternating between 1992 Paris and Los Angeles in 2018. At its center are a young writer and a young model on the verge of fame, both reckless, impulsive, addicted, and deeply in love. Twenty-five years later, the writer is rich, famous, and numb, and he wants to drive his car into a tree, when he receives an anonymous message that draws him back to the life, and possibly the love, he abandoned years prior. Written in the same percussive, propulsive, dazzling, breathtaking style as A Million Little Pieces, Katerina echoes and complements that most controversial of memoirs, and plays with the same issues of fiction and reality that created, nearly destroyed, and then recreated James Frey in the American imagination.
From New York Times bestselling author, J. Daniels, comes an all new second chance romance. Luke Evans is a heartbreaker. I didn’t want to give mine to him. Not when he kept me out. He gave me enough, just enough to make me fall in love with him. I say this to convince myself. But I know the truth. I would’ve fallen in love with him at a distance. Handing my heart over to Luke was the easiest thing I’ve ever done. I was naive when I wished for more, when I hoped he wanted the same things I did. I try to hate him. I try to forget him. But it’s not that easy. Love is a ruthless bitch, and I’m her latest victim. ~*~ Tessa Kelly is a man-eater. When she sets her sights on you, she doesn’t just consume your heart, she goes for your soul. What we had was perfect, real, and all I would ever want. But she destroyed it. She destroyed us. I try to hate her. I try to forget her. But it’s not that easy. Love is for people who have hope, and I have none.
Do you think the world is going to shit? And that manners are being thrown out the window? And that common sense and common courtesy are becoming uncommon? And that you are now dealing with idiots that bit too often? You are not alone. We are all collectively treating each other worse than ever before. We talk to each other like dickheads. We drive like wankers. We leave piss on the toilet seat. We shake hands as if they’ve turned into floppy fish. We treat money as the be-all and end-all. Yann thinks this is down to us slowly losing touch with our own humanity. In other words, we care more about ourselves than the person next to us. Sure, capitalism and technology are partly to blame. But at the end of the day, if we don’t start treating each other a little better, we’re all truly fucked. There’s no way in hell we’ll be able to work together long enough to resolve the catastrophic problems coming our way. To that end, ‘don’t be stupid, idiot’ is chock full of 120+ hilarious, sweary, sarcastic, hard-hitting rants about everyday things that everyday idiots do, with quasi-serious, tongue in cheek exercises to help idiots be less idiotic. Each rant also has a QR code or link to share with that idiot of a friend who needs to read it! Rants include: Queue cutting Cancel culture Buying rounds Splitting the bill Holding the door open Ignoring reserved seating Treating pets as humans Tailgating Reclining plane seats Taking the mick Conspiracy theorists & many more! No one is innocent of being an idiot, including you. It is impossible to read this book and not realise at least one or two ways in which you’ve started to not give a shit about your fellow human. Yann hopes that, instead of being a little bitch about it, you’ll use all the reality checks you’ll receive to become a better person who is more aware of how their actions affect others. Entertainment: Guaranteed Fucks Given: Zero Legitimate Reviews “Brilliant!! But it can’t go on our best seller’s list because most of our readers are idiots” – Some shit newspaper “Bought for my idiot friend. Was a prick, still is but at least he knows it now!!” – An idiot “The perfect stupid gift for my boyfriend/husband/dad/brother!! They can be a right wanker!” – Wanker-loving idiot Get the book now, you muppet. Yann doesn’t care whether you buy it as a Secret Santa piss-take for colleagues, a really stupid gift for Christmas, a birthday present for people you don't like, for bloody Mother’s and Father’s day, or just because you like books taking the mick. Just buy the thing and start your journey towards being less of a prick. Still don’t know if ‘don’t be stupid, idiot’ is for you? If you enjoyed Mark Manson’s, ‘The subtle art of not giving a f*ck’, Laura Clery’s, ‘Idiots’, Thomas Erikson’s, ‘Surrounded by idiots’ or Karl Pilkington’s, ‘An idiot abroad’, you’ll love this! You’ll also feel right at home if you relate to the logic and pull no punches style of outspoken people like Ricky Gervais, Jeremy Clarkson, Piers Morgan and James Haskell.
In Bitch, Get Your Shit Right!, the book takes a bold approach and gets in the face of todays women. Women are not a minority but a majority! They have become so out of control that they are no longer recognized as ladies. This is a groundbreaking approach at addressing the problems relating to women with bad behavior. You will find Bitch, Get Your Shit Right! a hurtful yet truthful empowering eye-opener! With love, Blaque Rudy
Available for the first time together in one volume, the final two stories in the Brown and De Luca series from New York Times bestselling author Maggie Shayne. Innocent Prey Self-help superstar Rachel de Luca and Detective Mason Brown have finally given in to their overwhelming attraction to each other, but neither of them is ready to let physical passion turn into full-blown romance. When a judge’s daughter disappears, Mason has a terrible sense that it’s connected to the most recent case they solved together. The discovery of a string of missing women—all young, all troubled—seems like a promising lead. But there’s no clear connection between the missing girls. He realizes that once again he’ll have to rely on his own well-honed instincts and Rachel’s uncanny capacity to see through people’s lies in order to catch a predator and rescue his captives. But can they do it before Rachel becomes his next victim? Deadly Obsession Rachel de Luca has a bad feeling about the new woman in Detective Mason Brown’s life, the nurse taking care of him after he’s injured in the line of duty. She’d like to think it’s just jealousy, but intuition tells her it’s something more, maybe something dangerous. Mason knows Rachel’s wary of commitment, and asking her to stay when he’s in this condition would be the worst thing for their relationship. Then they receive chilling news: Mason’s psychotic sister-in-law has escaped from custody, and her sons—the nephews Mason is raising—are missing and the clock is ticking. As Mason and Rachel try to find the boys, she senses a new and unexpected danger stalking them. Soon, everyone close to Mason is in deadly peril—Rachel more than anyone….
