An urgent, illuminating exploration of the social nature of shame and of how it might be used to promote large-scale political change and social reform. “[Jacquet] exposes the ways shame plays into collective ideas of punishment and reward, and the social mechanisms that dictate the ways we dictate our behavior.” —The Boston Globe Examining how we can retrofit the art of shaming for the age of social media, Jennifer Jacquet shows that we can challenge corporations and even governments to change policies and behaviors that are detrimental to the environment. Urgent and illuminating, Is Shame Necessary? offers an entirely new understanding of how shame, when applied in the right way and at the right time, has the capacity to keep us from failing our planet and, ultimately, from failing ourselves.
Now a New York Times bestseller and from the author of The Psychopath Test, a captivating and brilliant exploration of one of our world's most underappreciated forces: shame. 'It's about the terror, isn't it?' 'The terror of what?' I said. 'The terror of being found out.' For the past three years, Jon Ronson has travelled the world meeting recipients of high-profile public shamings. The shamed are people like us - people who, say, made a joke on social media that came out badly, or made a mistake at work. Once their transgression is revealed, collective outrage circles with the force of a hurricane and the next thing they know they're being torn apart by an angry mob, jeered at, demonized, sometimes even fired from their job. A great renaissance of public shaming is sweeping our land. Justice has been democratized. The silent majority are getting a voice. But what are we doing with our voice? We are mercilessly finding people's faults. We are defining the boundaries of normality by ruining the lives of those outside it. We are using shame as a form of social control. Simultaneously powerful and hilarious in the way only Jon Ronson can be, So You've Been Publicly Shamed is a deeply honest book about modern life, full of eye-opening truths about the escalating war on human flaws - and the very scary part we all play in it.
This volume combines empirical research-based and theoretical perspectives on shame in cultural contexts and from socio-culturally different perspectives, providing new insights and a more comprehensive cultural base for contemporary research and practice in the context of shame. It examines shame from a positive psychology perspective, from the angle of defining the concept as a psychological and cultural construct, and with regard to practical perspectives on shame across cultures. The volume provides sound foundations for researchers and practitioners to develop new models, therapies and counseling practices to redefine and re-frame shame in a way that leads to strength, resilience and empowerment of the individual.
Can a better understanding of shame lead us to see its positive contribution to human life? For many people, shame really is a destructive and health-disrupting force. Too often it cripples and silences victims of other people's shameful behavior, and research has demonstrated clearly the damaging effects of shame on our emotional wellbeing. To combat this, a mini-industry of resources and popular therapies has emerged to help people free themselves from shame. And yet, shame can contribute to a healthy emotional and moral experience. Some behavior is shameful, and sometimes we ought to be ashamed by wrongs we've committed. Eastern and Western cultures alike have long seen a social benefit to shame, and it can rightly cultivate virtues both public and personal. So what are we to make of shame? Philosopher and author Gregg Ten Elshof examines this potent emotion carefully, defining it with more clarity, distinguishing it from embarrassment and guilt, and carefully tracing the positive role shame has played historically in contributing to a well-ordered society. While casting off unhealthy shame is always a positive, For Shame demonstrates the surprising, sometimes unacknowledged ways in which healthy shame is as needed as ever. On the other side of good shame, lie virtues such as decency, self-respect, and dignity—virtues we desire but may not realize shame can grant.
Whether we realize it or not, shame affects every aspect of our lives. But God is telling a different story. Curt Thompson unpacks the soul of shame, revealing its ubiquitous nature and neurobiological roots while providing the theological and practical tools necessary to dismantle shame. Embrace healing and wholeness as you find freedom from the negative messages that bind you.
An intimate look at the full spectrum of shame—often masked by addiction, promiscuity, perfectionism, self-loathing, or narcissism—that offers a new, positive route forward Encounters with embarrassment, guilt, self-consciousness, remorse, etc. are an unavoidable part of everyday life, and they sometimes have lessons to teach us—about our goals and values, about the person we expect ourselves to be. In contrast to the prevailing cultural view of shame as a uniformly toxic influence, Shame is a book that approaches the subject of shame as an entire family of emotions which share a “painful awareness of self.” Challenging widely-accepted views within the self-esteem movement, author Joseph Burgo argues that self-esteem does NOT thrive in the soil of non-stop praise and encouragement, but rather depends upon setting and meeting goals, living up to the expectations we hold for ourselves, and finally sharing our joy in achievement with the people who matter most to us. Along the way, listening to and learning from our encounters with shame will go further than affirmations and positive self-talk in helping us to build authentic self-esteem. Richly illustrated with clinical stories from Burgo's 35 years in private practice, Shame also describes the myriad ways that unacknowledged shame often hides behind a broad spectrum of mental disorders including social anxiety, narcissism, addiction, and masochism.
What does it mean to be poor in Britain and America? For decades the primary narrative about poverty in both countries is that it has been caused by personal flaws or ‘bad life decisions’ rather than policy choices or economic inequality. This misleading account has become deeply embedded in the public consciousness with serious ramifications for how financially vulnerable people are seen, spoken about and treated. Drawing on a two-year multi-platform initiative, this book by award-winning journalist and author Mary O’Hara, asks how we can overturn this portrayal once and for all. Crucially, she turns to the real experts to try to find answers – the people who live it.
This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author. "I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw,"to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed." Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.
Read the book that's getting conversion therapy banned in Canada Winner of the Independent Book Publisher Award, Finalist for the Randy Shilts Award for Gay Nonfiction and the Saints and Sinners Emerging Writer Award. "Unforgettable... This book is appallingly appropriate in these times." — FOREWORD REVIEWS This resonant and acclaimed memoir recounts the six years that the author spent in a bizarre form of conversion therapy that attempted to "cure" him of his homosexuality, and the inspiring story of how he cast out shame and reclaimed his life. Kept with other patients in a cult-like home in British Columbia, Canada, Peter Gajdics was under the authority of a dominating, rogue psychiatrist who controlled his patients, in part, by creating and exploiting a false sense of family. Juxtaposed against his parents' tormented past–his mother's incarceration and escape from a communist concentration camp in post-World War II Yugoslavia, and his father's upbringing as an orphan in war-torn Hungary, The Inheritance of Shame explores the universal themes of childhood trauma, oppression, and intergenerational pain. “DEEPLY MOVING." — THE ADVOCATE “RAW AND UNFLINCHING" — KIRKUS REVIEWS “A HERO’S JOURNEY IN WHICH ANY READER, GAY OR STRAIGHT, CAN FIND INSPIRATION.” — LAMBDA LITERARY FOUNDATION All over the United States and Canada, districts, cities and states are banning conversion, ex-gay and reparative therapies. A powerful example of "healing through memoir," this book offers the most complete and compelling reason for those bans to date. A groundbreaking memoir, The Inheritance of Shame offers insights into overcoming all kinds of shame, especially that which has trickled down from previous generations, and into the complicated but all-too-worthwhile process of forgiveness.
In this ambitious new work, Frank Broucek explores the affect of shame--its functions, and its relationship to sexuality, self, and others. With a special focus on the relationship between shame and self-objectification, he proposes an innovative new theory that links shame to our sense of self from early development through maturity. In exploring this theme, Broucek--a psychoanalytically trained psychiatrist--breaks new ground in understanding the development of the self, establishing a perspective on narcissism that differs markedly from traditional psychoanalytic concepts. An illuminating overview of the modern literature precedes a provocative analysis of the role of shame in the formation of the self. Here, Broucek identifies the three major sources of shame: the infant's experiences of interpersonal inefficacy; self-objectification resulting in a kind of self-alienation or primary dissociation; and the experience of being unloved, rejected, or scapegoated by important others. In the course of development, these vectors cause the self's overinvestment in the idealized self-image and a devaluation of the actual self, an event explored in depth in the chapter on narcissism. Broucek also addresses the role of shame in psychoanalysis and in society. The neglect of this emotion in psychoanalytic theory and technique, the author contends, results from a critical lack of understanding of shame and its effect--potentially adverse--on the practice of psychotherapy. Finally, Broucek's analysis of widespread shamelessness in modern times logically extends the ideas presented earlier. Maintaining a critical balance in its coverage and interpretation, SHAME AND THE SELF marks a significant contribution to the understanding of the nature of shame and its role in our psychic life. As such, it is essential reading for all practicing psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, and other mental health practitioners.
