Before I Do

Before I Do

Author: Elizabeth F. Schwartz

Publisher: New Press, The

Published: 2012-10-02

Total Pages: 198

ISBN-13: 1620971550

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A comprehensive guide to marriage—perks, consequences, and everything in between—aimed at the LGBTQ+ community, from a leading gay rights lawyer. Not long ago, same-sex couples had to jump through endless hoops to make their relationships even close to legal. Happily, those days are over. But here’s the rub: many gay and lesbian couples, accustomed to living off-grid, are so thrilled to have the benefits of marriage that they jump into it without fully considering the consequences. In Before I Do, leading gay rights attorney Elizabeth F. Schwartz spells out the range of practical considerations any couple should address before tying the knot. She explains the rights married couples have—and those they do not. With cameos from some of the most prominent LGBTQ+ professionals, Schwartz explores all of the implications of marriage from name changes and getting a license to taxes, insurance, Social Security, and much more. Chapters on estate planning, pre- and post-nuptial agreements, and organizing finances make Before I Do a crucial handbook for anyone considering marriage—because, as Schwartz explains, just because you can get married does not mean you should. “During my thirty years of covering the gay beat for the Miami Herald, never did I imagine the need for a marriage guide for LGBT couples. Yet today nothing is more urgent. Before I Do guides all couples, gay and otherwise, about the responsibilities of marriage. Ignore it at your peril.” —Steve Rothaus, The Miami Herald


Gay Couple's Guide to Wedding Planning

Gay Couple's Guide to Wedding Planning

Author: David Toussaint

Publisher: Sellers Publishing

Published: 2012

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781416208495

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The go-to guide for a kick-ass wedding! Before you say, I do, you've got a lot to do! This book reveals everything you need to know about planning the perfect wedding, from telling the folks to budgeting to writing vows that express what's in your heart. The Gay Couple's Guide to Wedding Planning is the perfect book for male couples who want to understand how to take the stress out of every stage of putting together a memorable ceremony and reception. In his lively, witty style, Toussaint reveals how to deal with relatives who may not be accepting of your lifestyle, how to search for gay-friendly vendors, and what grooms need to know about grooming. There are also fitness tips to keep guys in great shape. Featuring more than 100 color photos, this user-friendly, 12-month guide walks you through all the essentials. There's practical advice on booking a site, hiring a band or DJ (or a drag queen), registering for flowers, and deciding just how gay you want your honeymoon to be. There are tips on other considerations: do you throw two bachelor parties or one?; who proposes to whom?; do you need two best men?; and is it still okay to throw the bouquet? Toussaint includes advice for every budget with money-saving cheap tricks that will help you celebrate without breaking the bank. Inspiring true stories of gay couples who found wedded bliss are included throughout. The Gay Couple's Guide to Wedding Planning is an indispensable resource for creating the ceremony of your dreams!


The Gay Man's Guide to Open and Monogamous Marriage

The Gay Man's Guide to Open and Monogamous Marriage

Author: Michael Dale Kimmel

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield

Published: 2017-06-09

Total Pages: 300

ISBN-13: 1442268026

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Legal gay marriage is still a relatively new phenomenon. As gay men who are now able to get married, we find ourselves in a bit of a quandary: for many male couples, sex is a lot more important for us than it is for heterosexuals. Two married men often have a stronger desire for sex - wanting more of it and with a wider variety of partners - than married opposite-sex couples. How does this work within the structure of a monogamous marriage? Is an open relationship a better structure for gay marriage? Assuming that gay marriages will emulate heterosexual marriages is neither a valid nor a helpful assumption. But, as gay men, where does that leave us? There are currently no “rule books” for how a marriage between two men could or should work. While there are lots of books about how to plan your gay wedding, there are virtually none that address what to do after the honeymoon is over (literally and figuratively). This book fills that void. It offers married gay couples (and gay men considering marriage) an easy-to-follow, practical framework that they can use to help create, adjust and structure their marriages. Using helpful examples and first-hand quotes throughout, Openly-gay psychotherapist Michael Dale Kimmel offers a roadmap for gay men who want to be married but have questions and concerns about monogamy and monotony.


Man Talk

Man Talk

Author: Neil Kaminsky

Publisher: Routledge

Published: 2013-04-03

Total Pages: 188

ISBN-13: 1136575235

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Learn to recognize and resolve communication problems common to gay male relationships Man Talk presents effective techniques to help gay couples communicate better on the way to enjoying a fulfilling relationship. This practical guide from the author of Affirmative Gay Relationships examines common problems that create communication difficulties and offers straightforward, easy-to-use strategies for understanding feelings, resolving arguments, expressing anger, understanding nonverbal communication, improving listening skills, expressing love and appreciation, and dealing with issues specific to interracial and intercultural relationships. Man Talk explores areas very well known to gay men, such as competition, the need to “win” arguments, and uncertainty about how to handle anger. Written by a licensed clinical social worker, this unique book avoids clinical jargon in presenting the thoughts of gay men in multiple, detailed vignettes that illustrate effective—and ineffective—communication. This practical guide provides proven methods of avoiding communication “destroyers,” hidden agendas, the need to be “right,” and disagreements that become “courtroom” battles, and offers effective ways of saying what you really mean, listening to your partner, dealing with uncomfortable subjects (like sex and money), and recognizing that there are many levels of communication (body movement, silence, voice inflection, etc.) that will significantly impact the quality of interaction between two men. Topics examined in Man Talk include: understanding what effective communication is—and why it’s so important how major misunderstandings can develop—and how to avoid them how communication can be destroyed—and how to prevent it from happening understanding the nature of anger and learning how to manage it understanding male socialization that teaches men to be “in control” learning how to relinquish the need to be in control all of the time how men can “let go” and become aware of, accept, and communicate their feelings learning how to listen—and not preach how to identify and deal with a relationship that’s in trouble how to communicate appreciation, care and love and much more! Man Talk is a must-read for all gay men interested in relationships—past, present, and future. It’s also an essential professional guide for therapists who work with gay men and for concerned friends of gay men who want to help.


Happy Together

Happy Together

Author: Sharon Scales Rostosky

Publisher: American Psychological Association

Published: 2015-03-16

Total Pages: 332

ISBN-13: 1433819546

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Many same-sex couples are stigmatized because of their relationship and experience significant stress. In every life context—family, work, neighborhood, religious communities, and in social and legal contexts—same-sex couples have to make decisions about disclosure, how to respond to prejudice, and how to cope with negative feelings about themselves and their experiences. This book helps couples work together to identify, develop, and use their strengths and skills to successfully navigate these issues and flourish. Tough tasks like confronting prejudice will never be easy, but thanks to the stories, tools, and resources presented in this book, readers will learn to manage such situations in a positive way. Learning activities in each chapter guide couples to become more aware of the causes of stress in their relationship, and to take positive actions to strengthen their commitment. Readers will learn how to cultivate the strengths of their LGBTQ identities, assert appropriate boundaries, create supportive relationships with others, and contribute authentically to their families and communities.


Handbook of LGBT-Affirmative Couple and Family Therapy

Handbook of LGBT-Affirmative Couple and Family Therapy

Author: Jerry J. Bigner

Publisher: Routledge

Published: 2012-05-04

Total Pages: 510

ISBN-13: 1136340327

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The editors and contributors of this comprehensive text provide a unique and important contribution to LGBT clinical literature. Spanning 30 chapters, they discuss the diverse and complex issues involved in LGBT couple and family therapy. In almost 15 years, this book provides the first in-depth overview of the best practices for therapists and those in training who wish to work effectively with LGBT clients, couples, and families need to know, and is only the second of its kind in the history of the field. The clinical issues discussed include • raising LGBT children • coming out • elderly LGBT issues • sex therapy • ethical and training issues Because of the breadth of the book, its specificity, and the expertise of the contributing authors and editors, it is the definitive handbook on LGBT couple and family therapy.


Handbook of LGBTQ-Affirmative Couple and Family Therapy

Handbook of LGBTQ-Affirmative Couple and Family Therapy

Author: Rebecca Harvey

Publisher: Routledge

Published: 2021-11-29

Total Pages: 689

ISBN-13: 1000479099

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This comprehensive second edition inspires therapists to utilize clinical work to pragmatically address intersectional oppressions, lessen the burden of minority stress, and implement effective LGBTQ affirmative therapy. A unique and important contribution to LGBTQ literature, this handbook includes both new and updated chapters reflecting cutting-edge intersectional themes like race, ethnicity, polyamory, and monosexual normativity. A host of expert contributors outline the best practices in affirmative therapy, inspiring therapists to guide LGBTQ clients into deconstructing the heteronormative power imbalances that undermine LGBTQ relationships and families. There is also an increased focus on clinical application, with fresh vignettes included throughout to highlight effective treatment strategies. Couple and family therapists and clinicians working with LGBTQ clients, and those interested in implementing affirmative therapy in their practice, will find this updated handbook essential.


Keeping Mr. Right

Keeping Mr. Right

Author: Dr. Kenneth D. George

Publisher:

Published: 2004

Total Pages: 212

ISBN-13:

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In this comprehensive follow-up to his bestselling Mr. Right is Out There, Kenneth George offers, in the same warm and wise manner, guidelines for gay men on forming successful male couples. Known for his commonsense and honest approach to relationships, Dr. George explores the issues facing gay couples and offers advice on working through them rather than letting them become insurmountable. Included in the book are tips on: negotioating changes rather tham living with annoying differences; defining your relationship with a 'job description'; and having great sex!


When Your Gay Or Lesbian Child Marries

When Your Gay Or Lesbian Child Marries

Author: Deborah M. Merrill

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield Publishers

Published: 2016-01-14

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781442254183

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As more and more same-sex couples marry, their parents may need to learn new strategies for continuing healthy relationships with their children and their partners. This book offers a guide to understanding same-sex marriage and, through firsthand accounts, how natal family relationships change, yet can be loving and supportive.