The only collection of the most offensive, politically incorrect and often disgusting (but hilarious) dirty jokes that the hottest comics in the worldwill only tell each other! No-one is spared: ranging from the silly to the sick, the sadistic to the sublime, these are the jokes comedians share only among themselves, finally compiled in one place for the first time ever.
A treasury of irreverent, politically incorrect, and wholly distasteful jokes represents top-selected submissions to the b3ta.com Web site, in a volume that is complemented by equally biting illustrations. Original.
From Andrew Dice Clay, the “Undisputed Heavyweight Comedy King,” comes the unapologetic and uncensored autobiography fans have been waiting for. Andrew Dice Clay’s raw and uncensored stand-up comedy has shocked and entertained audiences for decades and continues to do so to this day. When he released his debut album, Dice, in 1989, the parental advisory label simply read “Warning: This album is offensive.” His material stretched the boundaries of decency and good taste to their breaking point, and in turn he became the biggest stand-up comic in the world. But Dice’s meteoric rise and spectacular fame brought on a furious backlash from the media and critics. By the mid-nineties, though still playing to packed audiences, the turmoil in his personal life, plus attacks from every activist group imaginable, led him to make the decision to step out of the spotlight and put the focus on raising his boys. The Diceman was knocked down, but not out. Taking inspiration from what Frank Sinatra once told him—“You work for your fans, not the media. The media gets their tickets for free”—Dice has bounced back with critically acclaimed roles and is once again playing to sold-out audiences. Filled with no-holds-barred humor and honesty, The Filthy Truth sets the record straight and gives fans plenty of never-before-shared stories from his career and his friendships with Howard Stern, Sam Kinison, Mickey Rourke, Sylvester Stallone, Axl Rose, and countless others.
Millions of viewers know and love Bob Saget from his role as the sweetly neurotic father on the smash hit Full House, and as the charming wisecracking host of America's Funniest Home Videos. And then there are the legions of fans who can't get enough of his scatological, out-of-his-mind stand-up routines, comedy specials, and outrageously profane performances in such shows as HBO's Entourage and the hit documentary The Aristocrats. In his bold and wildly entertaining publishing debut, he continues to embrace his dark side and gives readers the book they have long been waiting for—hilarious and often dirty. Bob believes there's a time and a place for filth. From his never-before-heard stories of what really went on behind the scenes of two of the most successful family shows of all times, with co-stars like John Stamos and Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, to his tales of legendary friends and colleagues like Rodney Dangerfield, Richard Pryor, Don Rickles, and other show business legends, Saget opens up about some of his personal experiences with life and death, his career, and his reputation for sick humor—all with his highly original blend of silliness, vulgarity, humor and heart, and all framed by a man who loves being funny above all else.
Featured in the New York Times 2017 "Holiday Gift Guide for Hardcover Fans" Get an insider's oral history of the World's most iconic comedy club, featuring exclusive interviews with today's most hilarious stars recalling their time on stage (and off) at the Improv. In 1963, 30-year-old Budd Friedman—who had recently quit his job as a Boston advertising executive and returned to New York to become a theatrical producer—opened a coffee house for Broadway performers called the Improvisation. Later shortened to the Improv, its first seedy West 44th Street location initially attracted the likes of Judy Garland, Liza Minnelli, Albert Finney, and Jason Robards, as well as a couple of then-unknowns named Dustin Hoffman and Bette Midler. While it drew near-capacity crowds almost from day one, it wasn't until comedians began dropping by to try out new material that the Improv truly hit its stride. The club became the first venue to present live stand-up in a continuous format, and in the process reinvented the art form and created the template for all other comedy clubs that followed. From the microphone to the iconic brick wall, the Improv has been the launching pad for practically every major name in American comedy over the last five-plus decades. Now, in The Improv, Friedman, along with a Who's Who of his most famous alumni—including Jay Leno, Jerry Seinfeld, Jimmy Fallon, Larry David, Billy Crystal, Lily Tomlin, Judd Apatow, Al Franken, Paul Reiser, Howie Mandel, Bob Saget, Drew Carey, and many more—tell it like it was in the first-ever oral history of how this game-changing comedy club came to be. The Improv gives readers an exclusive look at what really happened onstage and off-mic at one of America's most venerable institutions.
A book of truly obscene and offensive insults, sex terms, and pop culture phrases translated into American Sign Language-from the YouTube sensation with more than 2 million views and counting Have you ever been in a noisy bar and wanted to insult or pick up someone? Now you can say: - Douche canoe - Cum dumpster - I lost my virginity, can I have yours? - There's a party in my pants, and you're invited - Do you spit or swallow? - Does the carpet match the curtains? - Gargle my balls - Was that a queef? - You cum-guzzling ass-pirate! - Sperm burper - Let's play leap-frog naked! There are plenty of books and Websites that teach you basic sign language phrases like "Hello," "I love you," and some even cross the line into crass with "fuck you," "asshole," or "bite me," but Super Smutty Sign Language is the only book that delivers truly obscene and offensive insults, sex terms, and pop culture phrases including "Suck a bag of dicks," "Bitch, please!" "You motorboating son of a bitch!" and "Blumpkin". Kristin Henson, creator of the YouTube channel Dirty Signs with Kristin, presents over 200 dirty, vulgar, foul, and disgusting words and phrases guaranteed to make you blush.
Once in a lifetime a venue comes along that changes show business dramatically, that fosters growth and camaraderie, experimentation and freedom. The Comic Strip is one of those places, and Make ’Em Laugh is an inside look at how it all happened, straight from the mouths of the stars who built their careers on its stage. Owner Richie Tienken and a wealth of comics open their hearts and souls to share their most intimate memories, the laughs and tears, the good times and the bad, in order to paint an all-encompassing, behind-the-scenes history of this iconic club. Interviews include famous comedians, such as: • Jerry Seinfeld • Gilbert Gottfried • Paul Reiser • Lisa Lampanelli • George Wallace • Billy Crystal • Jim Breuer • Susie Essman • Lewis Black • Ray Romano • And many more! Relive the excitement as these comics explain how they came to belong to the Comic Strip family, and how they went on to enjoy huge careers, bringing laughter to millions of people all over the world. This book is a must for any comedian or comedy lover’s library!
Once in a lifetime a venue comes along that changes show business dramatically, that fosters growth and camaraderie, experimentation and freedom. The Comic Strip is one of those places, and Laughing Legends is an inside look at how it all happened, straight from the mouths of the stars who built their careers on its stage. Owner Richie Tienken and a wealth of comics open their hearts and souls to share their most intimate memories, the laughs and tears, the good times and the bad, in order to paint an all-encompassing, behind-the-scenes history of this iconic club. Interviews include famous comedians, such as: Jerry Seinfeld Gilbert Gottfried Paul Reiser Lisa Lampanelli George Wallace Billy Crystal Jim Breuer Susie Essman Lewis Black Ray Romano And many more! Relive the excitement as these comics explain how they came to belong to the Comic Strip family, and how they went on to enjoy huge careers, bringing laughter to millions of people all over the world. This book is a must for any comedian or comedy lover's library!