Don't Poop in the Tub

Don't Poop in the Tub

Author: Colin Fabian Murphy

Publisher:

Published: 2021-04-14

Total Pages: 26

ISBN-13:

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When my bubble bath for one becomes a bubble bath for two, it's time to lay down some rules of what pirates do and don't do! Come join our adventure across the wide soap sea, I know you'll love it too, just you wait and see.


You Don't Look Sick: Quick and Dirty Tips for Surviving Ulcerative Colitis

You Don't Look Sick: Quick and Dirty Tips for Surviving Ulcerative Colitis

Author: AW Cross

Publisher: Glory Box Press

Published: 2016-05-27

Total Pages: 102

ISBN-13: 0995099103

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You’ve just been diagnosed with ulcerative colitis. Now what? Being diagnosed with ulcerative colitis can be overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. In You Don't Look Sick: Quick and Dirty Tips for Surviving Ulcerative Colitis, author and ulcerative colitis veteran AW Cross gives you a first-hand, non-medical perspective about what to expect from your illness and how to get through it with your sanity (and your favorite underwear) intact. Through a unique blend of practicality and humor, you’ll learn how to: •Cope with the physical consequences and emotional impact of ulcerative colitis •Pack a survival kit and leave your bathroom with confidence •Dress, eat, and have sex •Deal with healthcare professionals and enjoy your stays in the hospital •Endure poop jokes and use social media responsibly •Put on your big boy/girl pants and deal with it Whether you’ve just been diagnosed or struggled with UC for years, if you’re determined not to let your illness define you, this book is for you. If you’d rather wallow in self-pity, have no sense of humor about your illness, and hate kittens and babies, DON’T BUY THIS BOOK!


The Slip

The Slip

Author: Mark Sampson

Publisher: Dundurn

Published: 2017-05-20

Total Pages: 272

ISBN-13: 1459735773

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In this wickedly funny novel, one bad afternoon and two regrettable comments make the inimitable Philip Sharpe go viral for all the worst reasons. Dr. Philip Sharpe, absent-minded professor extraordinaire, teaches philosophy at the University of Toronto and is one of Canada’s most combative public intellectuals. But when a live TV debate with his fiercest rival goes horribly off the rails, an oblivious Philip says some things to her that he really shouldn’t have. As a clip of Philip’s “slip” goes viral, it soon reveals all the cracks and fissures in his marriage with his young, stay-at-home wife, Grace. And while the two of them try to get on the same side of the situation, things quickly spiral out of control. Can Philip make amends and save his marriage? Is there any hope of salvaging his reputation? To do so, he’ll need to take a hard look at his on-air comments, and to conscript a band of misfits in a scheme to set things right.


The Real Body Manual

The Real Body Manual

Author: Nancy Redd

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2024-10-22

Total Pages: 289

ISBN-13: 0593541405

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A revolutionary health resource for young adults of all genders to understand, appreciate, and take care of their bodies, with color photos throughout How can the savviest and most connected generation in history have no photographic guide to puberty? Until now! The Real Body Manual is a comprehensive health and wellness guidebook for all genders—from the author of the ALA Quick Pick for Reluctant Young Adult Readers and instant New York Times and USA Today bestseller Body Drama. Inspired by her own kids entering the tween and teen years, Nancy Redd has crafted a uniquely inclusive book that offers a factual and candid approach to the complex and often confusing body issues that all young people face. This go-to resource or all types of developing bodies contains medically vetted, relatable advice alongside full-color photographic references. The Real Body Manual is for curious readers from puberty and beyond and is a conversation starter for parents, caregivers, uncles and aunts, older siblings, counselors, teachers, and health professionals—essentially anyone who would like to more fully understand and effectively relate to the body-image and self-discovery challenges faced by the young people in their life. Created with today's open-minded and diverse kids in mind, this book tackles acne, body odor, constipation and diarrhea, chests and breasts, dandruff, sleep hygiene, sexual health, self-care, and so much more in a judgement-free and gender-neutral way. The Real Body Manual is the encouraging book that modern young adults are waiting for—and an eye-opening book their parents are likely to learn from, too!


Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe

Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe

Author: Jeremy Greenberg

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

Published: 2011-10-11

Total Pages: 69

ISBN-13: 1449407897

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A light and lively companion to Sorry I Peed on You, Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe is a hilarious collection of full-color photos and letters of apologies and suggestions from dogs to the people who love them—no matter what bad thing they’ve done! Inside Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe, writer and comedian Jeremy Greenberg presents a collection of 50 laugh-out-loud letters and accompanying full-color photographs that explain Fido's love of funky smells, why a ball needs to be thrown again, and practically every other lovably loony canine characteristic. From an impassioned plea to stop the silly nicknames, to an attempt to skip a bath, to explanations for stolen shoes and swiped sandwiches, Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe offers a pooch's perspective on common canine vs. human cohabitation conundrums. Sorry I Pooped in Your Shoe is the perfect gift for dog lovers and anyone who appreciates hilarious (and so true!) insights into dog--and human--nature.


Finlay Donovan Jumps the Gun

Finlay Donovan Jumps the Gun

Author: Elle Cosimano

Publisher: Minotaur Books

Published: 2023-01-31

Total Pages: 300

ISBN-13: 1250846021

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AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER! From USA Today bestseller and Edgar Award nominee Elle Cosimano, comes Finlay Donovan Jumps the Gun—the hilarious and heart-pounding next installment in the beloved Finlay Donovan series. "Fresh, heartfelt and witty, Finlay Donovan Jumps the Gun is a twisty page-turner, and its relatable heroine Finlay Donovan is irresistible!" —Janet Evanovich, #1 New York Times bestselling author of the Stephanie Plum series Dating. Diapers. And dodging bullets. Who said single moms can't have fun? Finlay Donovan has been in messes before—after all, she's an author and single mom who’s a pro at getting out bloodstains for rather unexpected reasons—but none quite like this. She and her nanny/partner-in-crime Vero accidentally destroyed a luxury car that they “borrowed” in the process of saving Finlay’s ex-husband. The Russian mob handled her debt, but that means Finlay now owes them. Still running the show from behind bars, mob boss Feliks has a task for Finlay: find a contract killer before the cops do. Problem is, the killer might be an officer. Luckily, hot cop Nick has started up a citizen’s police academy, so Finlay has the perfect cover-up to sleuth out the real criminal as she does some “research” for her new novel. Nick is more than happy to get close to Finlay, but he’s also getting dangerously close to the truth. As Finlay and Vero dodge potential spies and juggle the daily trials of parenting, they can only hope they find the crooked cop before Feliks catches up with them—not to mention revealing Vero’s mysterious past, Nick’s growing interest in Finlay, and the threat of her looming book deadline.


SmotherhoodTM

SmotherhoodTM

Author: Amanda Lamb

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield

Published: 2007-08-01

Total Pages: 227

ISBN-13: 1599216310

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A raw, funny, and irreverent collection of stories on parenting in the twenty-first century.


What I've Learned

What I've Learned

Author: Christopher T. Heist

Publisher: Outskirts Press

Published: 2014-09-26

Total Pages: 790

ISBN-13: 1478742488

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What I’ve Learned - An Encyclopedia of Perpetual Bullshit covers topics that affect us every single day, as seen through the eyes of Chris Heist. Just like you, he’s a nobody that wants to be a somebody. So he set out to write this book; losing two jobs, an apartment, and a marriage along the way. In this book you’ll learn how to properly reject etiquette, how to legally stare into your neighbor’s windows, how to properly support suicide, how to make sense out of idiotic laws, how to insult people’s mothers, how to piss off religious people, how to write a screenplay, how to use taboo words without getting your ass kicked, how to play drinking games, how to handle holidays, how to use the bible to avoid paying child support, how to spot a scumbag boss, how to disgust hotel staff, how to behave online, how to deal with addiction, how to properly be patriotic, how to skip high school, how to say impolite things in German, how to choose heroes, and how to enjoy what you have with the time you have to enjoy it. In his small circle of friends, he is both a legend and an asshole. But now, Christopher T. Heist can invade the lives of complete strangers as he shares his twisted perspective of everything he’s been exposed to. And yes, nothing is sacred. As a self-proclaimed actor, activist, poet, porn star, comedian, screenwriter, atheist, author, body-builder, recovered addict, part-time alcoholic, part-time racist, leader, winner, loser, counselor, ex-soldier, runner, bicyclist, laborer, prisoner, freethinker, singer, rapper, boxer, criminal, pimp, victim, street fighter, dirty fighter, dealer, director, graduate, guardian, sucker puncher, lover, photographer, model, artist, father, inventor, slave to the system, and all around survivalist; you may find yourself nodding in agreement to some of the crazy shit he hammers out in this book.


Silence is a Scary Sound

Silence is a Scary Sound

Author: Clint Edwards

Publisher: Page Street Publishing

Published: 2019-11-05

Total Pages: 201

ISBN-13: 1624148549

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I’d gone to college. I’d written for the New York Times. I had a solid credit score. How did I end up here? After his breakout hit book I’m Sorry . . . Love, Your Husband, Clint Edwards has more laugh-out-loud tales, this time from the “terrible twos” and “threenager” phases each of his kids went through. His relatable toddler stories leave parents and caregivers cackling, and remind us all that no one is the perfect parent. In fact, sometimes the only thing that gets Clint through the day is thinking about when his kids grow up . . . and all the ways he can finally exact his revenge. Like leaving a leaky sippy cup full of milk to rot under the back seat of his daughter’s car, or waking up at 4 a.m. to incessantly ask his son for a cheese stick. With essays like Locking Doors Is Hilarious Until the Fire Department Arrives, Poop Doesn’t Go Easily Down a Tub Drain, Dad’s Never the Favorite, and Face It—You’ll Never Pee Alone, Clint knows exactly what’s “terrible” about the twos . . . and threes.