"What is a gentleman, and why should every man aspire to be one? Does the ideal still have any value in the age of feminism, 'toxic masculinity,' and 'Men Going Their Own Way?' Traditional books on manners and gentlemanly behavior have always claimed that manhood is defined by certain universal principles. But these norms have now changed so radically that the standard advice, tried and true as much of it remains, requires new formulation to be useful to the modern man" -- back cover.
Manly Manners: Lifestyle & Modern Etiquette for the Young Man of the 21st Century is the first volume of a three-volume treatise on modern mens manners by fashion designer, lawyer, former senator Wayne James. Elegant, sophisticated, and immensely informativeyet edgy, sexy, witty, and even irreverent at timesthe trilogy is poised to become the definitive lifestyle guide for the modern man. Is there a difference in the way one holds a glass of red wine versus a glass of white? How should a young man conduct himself in a gay sauna? What are the rules for Shopping While Ethnic? Ever heard of a tabarro? How does a gentleman correctly wear one? What should a young man do (and not do) if detained by law enforcement officers? And whats the best way to survive prisonunraped? How should a gentleman comport himself when invited to coffee in Ethiopia or a funeral in Japan? Is there gloryhole etiquette? Who enters a revolving door first: The man or the woman? What about when entering and exiting restaurants? How should transgender people conduct themselves in gender-specific public restrooms? Ladies are taught how to sit, stand, and walk correctly. But whats the comportment for their male counterparts? Is there a way to politely suggest an enema to a sex-partner before engaging in anal sex? And what are the new and emerging rules for planning a same-sex wedding? How should a corn-fed, red-blooded, young man apologize to his tellak for getting a raging erection while being massaged on the gbektasi? Roll over and play dead? When conducting business in China or in the Arab World, what are the faux pas that can kill a multi-million-dollar deal? Is there a difference between a blazer and a sport coat? And whats the history of penny loafers or mens underwear? Such topics, and many moresome as mundane as how to correctly use a bidet, others as arcane as how to conduct oneself during an Audience with the popeare addressed in the more than 800 pages of Manly Manners: Lifestyle & Modern Etiquette for the Young Man of the 21st Century. Manners is a mans job; and Manly Manners is the new manual.
Gentlemen might be in short supply today, but this little book of wisdom could be a cure. If you're a young man who cares about the quality of his mark on the world -- or if you know such a young man -- the aphorisms of "The Gentleman's Handbook" may prove a helpful guide. ///////////////////////////////////////////////// Aaron Shepard is an author, photographer, publisher, and aspiring gentleman. He lives with his wife and fellow author, Anne L. Watson, in Bellingham, Washington. ///////////////////////////////////////////////// CONTENTS A Gentleman in Love A Gentleman in Speech A Gentleman in Society A Gentleman in Life ///////////////////////////////////////////////// SAMPLES A gentleman always finds a compliment for a lady he loves. A gentleman never compares one lady to another. A gentleman understands that every lady is a flower, and that love will make her bloom. ---------------------------- A gentleman listens carefully to others and takes pains to remember what he hears. A gentleman never smirks. A gentleman knows that words should be weighed, not counted. ---------------------------- A gentleman understands that the value of any person goes far beyond their usefulness to him. A gentleman does not leave messes for others to clean up. A gentleman knows he cannot help others if he does not stand on firm ground himself. ---------------------------- A gentleman knows that what he does is less important than how he does it. A gentleman does not avoid what should be resolved. A gentleman knows that his worth is measured not by what he collects but by what he contributes.
Essential Manners for Men helps men make the right decisions about what to do and say in every situation that counts. Peter Post, great-grandson of Emily Post, distills the essential information men need for all the important roles they play in life. Organized into three parts -- "Daily Life," "Social Life," and "On the Job" -- Essential Manners for Men resolves situations that can stump even the savviest. Peter Post's advice is sharp-witted and sensible, with tips, boxes, and candid anecdotes about his own etiquette blunders. Topics include: The most important behaviors to avoid and emulate at the gym, at work, on the golf course, at home, out with friends, at a business social event, and a child's ball game Tipping, driver's "ed-iquette," introductions, sportsmanship, and parenting Successfully sharing living spaces with a roommate, significant other, or spouse -- from the toilet seat to the remote control to the kitchen sink How to throw a great party or be the perfect guest How to successfully navigate the business dinner Things men do wrong that make women wince, and things men do right that women love The five-step process to resolve any situation where there is no etiquette "rule" Short and shoot-from-the-hip honest, Essential Manners for Men is a book no man can afford to be without.
America's #1 bible of business manners is rewritten for the '90s and includes such issues as sexual harrassment, non-discriminatory managing, substance abuse, disabled workers, and other timely topics. Every business person, from entry-level to CEO, needs this guide to the behavior that spells success.
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In preparing a book of etiquette for ladies, I would lay down as the first rule, "Do unto others as you would others should do to you." You can never be rude if you bear the rule always in mind, for what lady likes to be treated rudely? True Christian politeness will always be the result of an unselfish regard for the feelings of others, and though you may err in the ceremonious points of etiquette, you will never be impolite. Politeness, founded upon such a rule, becomes the expression, in graceful manner, of social virtues. The spirit of politeness consists in a certain attention to forms and ceremonies, which are meant both to please others and ourselves, and to make others pleased with us; a still clearer definition may be given by saying that politeness is goodness of heart put into daily practice; there can be no _true_ politeness without kindness, purity, singleness of heart, and sensibility.
On any given day, a man is faced with situations that demand a response. He runs into a friend who was recently fired . . . His date can’t seem to pry herself away from a texting conversation during dinner . . . Someone at his gym routinely monopolizes the equipment . . . He finds himself in a nearly unintelligible conversation with a client who has a thick foreign accent. In each of these scenarios, there are distinct responses that can determine the outcome—for better or worse. Knowing what to say is essential, because regardless of how many doors he opens or how often he remembers to bring a bottle of wine for the hostess, a gentleman’s reputation is often established on his ability to communicate. In this updated version of As a Gentleman Would Say, John Bridges and Bryan Curtis offer simple reminders and new ideas for any man who is eager to navigate the obstacle course of his own words.
